Digging through my belongings, I pulled out a clean pair of black yoga pants, a purple tank top, some black underwear, and a zipped up hoodie that was black with a subtle dark gray pattern made up of skulls and crossbones. Crossing my fingers, I dug back into my bag and came up with a toothbrush, my hairbrush, and my toiletries bag full of makeup and other essentials. Rini was officially my favorite person.
Heading next door to the bathroom, I was happy to find the room open. I stepped inside, set my things down, and eyed the shower. Seeing the curtain closed had my anxiety spiking. Michael was still out there, and while I knew he wasn’t actually behind the curtain, adrenaline flooded my system as I gripped the countertop, white knuckling the hard surface. I couldn’t breathe; I hated myself for it. Get a grip, Nix.
Footsteps on the stairs let me know that someone was on their way up. Damien knocked on the door and slowly opened it, being respectful and speaking through the gap.
“Nix, are you decent? I’m coming in.”
A small squeak was all I could get out through my tight throat, and I nodded. He must have gotten my intent because he was suddenly there, standing front of me. Wrapping me in his arms gently, he pulled my head to his chest. Slowly spinning us around, he put my back to the shower curtain and gently reached out and opened it.
“You’re alright, Nix.” He repeated it softly, letting the tenor of his voice soothe away my panic until I was able to breathe. “I’m never going to let him hurt you again.” A sharp hiss broke free from his chest, and I gazed up into darkened eyes, a set of fangs protruding from his mouth. I wasn’t even freaking out, something about Damien’s Gargoyle was comforting. He was stunning and strong and… I trusted him. Damn, that was new. Why was it so easy to trust these guys?
I lifted a hand, hesitating for a split second before running a fingertip over the sharp tip of a fang. The marble statue of the man in front of me rumbled as I did so and wings sprouted from his back. Ho-ly fuck!
A small yelp flew from my lips, and I scrambled back as they took up the only available space left. He honestly needed more room as his wings were folded to fit in the confines of the bathroom.
Can I? I spoke into Damien’s head, not entirely sure how to communicate with the sexy Gargoyle-man in front of me.
You think I’m sexy? He grinned, his fangs giving his smile a feral look.
Don’t get an ego about it there big guy. I smirked as I reached out and stroked my hand down one of his wings. He groaned, loud and with clear intent. He liked it, so I repeated it.
Fuck that feels good, sweetheart. No one’s ever touched me like this before.
I circled him, running my hand over his back where his wings sprouted. I loved the smooth, leathery feel of his wings, and I trailed my fingers over them, exploring his alternate form and getting to know his Gargoyle.
Nix, he gasped. You better stop. His thoughts were husky and deep, and I caught tendrils of his pleasure.
It was so much easier to initiate touching than to be the one touched, and I made a mental note of it.
I circled back in front of him, ducking under his wing to get there. Does he have a name? I crossed my arms over my chest and looked him over.
Yes. Damien. His tone said he found my question amusing.
I scoffed, What?! You don’t name your creature? It feels like he should have his own name.
He’s me, Nix.
I don’t know… my Phoenix has her own personality, dude. And it was true. She really did.
Names, we need names. It’s totally happening. I smiled, feeling more like myself by the second. Also, this communicating telepathically thing is amazing. I think I’ve got the hang of it. Any idea why I’m suddenly in the group?
I had been wondering about that earlier, and now the curiosity was tangible.
I have some theories. He responded, but chose not to elaborate as he drew his Gargoyle back under his skin. For now, why don’t you get cleaned up? If I leave the guys to your food prep much longer, it won’t be edible. I winced. Ryder’s eggs really were terrible, but the thought had been sweet. I was starving, though, so I shoved Damien out of the bathroom and toward the stairs.
“Are you alright now, sweetheart?”
I looked back to the shower and shook my head at my ridiculousness. “I don’t know what happened. I’m fine now. Thanks, Damien.” I reached out and touched his hand. My Phoenix ruffled her wings—she loved all the touching I was doing—giving me her approval and encouragement.
“You’ve been through so much, Nix. It’s normal for you to have some PTSD. Hell, it wouldn’t be normal if you didn’t.” His voice was low and thunderous.
I narrowed my eyes at him, searching for answers. “I feel like you’re talking about more than the last few days…”
Guilt was written all over his features. Oh, fuck. I groaned.
“You were projecting your pain and memories at me since you came back to your body. You didn’t have any control, so please don’t beat yourself up over it. I’m glad to know, to hold some of that pain for you. I want to be there for you, Nix, in everything. We all do.”
“You know about…” I couldn’t keep my throat from constricting around the words that didn’t want to be voiced into the universe, “… him.” I knew they knew about Michael, but I’d never shared anything with anyone about my foster brother.
Damien stepped into me, cupping my cheek and forcing my eyes to his. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. Nothing he did to you was ever your fault. The bastard deserved far worse than the prison sentence he’s serving. You’re strong… so fucking strong. You face your demons head on, and you win. It might not always feel like it, but you do, because every day you go on living is a day they don’t get the upper hand anymore. And fuck sweetheart, I want to be there for you, Nix. Let me… let us help you.” The conviction in his voice was forceful and convincing.
I let out a shuddering breath and looked up into his eyes. The sincerity found there was startling and he wasn’t looking at me with pity in his eyes. He wasn’t looking at me like a victim. He was looking at me like I was as strong as the Gargoyle he had shown me only minutes ago. Nodding, I took a small step back. My Phoenix was begging me to move forward, drawn to his strength and the ebb and flow of magic beneath his skin, but I was all too aware of my appearance. I needed that shower, and to brush my teeth. I didn’t want my first kiss with Damien to be one where I felt like I was holding back, self-conscious. Somehow I knew kissing him would rock my world, and I wasn’t ready for it yet. Soon, but not yet.
Damien must have heard my thoughts, damn lack of a mental wall, and I smirked as I backed into the bathroom.
“Nix,” my name was a moan on his lips, tinged with the roughness of his alternate half.
“Goodbye, Damien.” I smirked and shut the door as he advanced a step. Locking it, I leaned against the wooden door, trying to process everything that had just happened.
When I do kiss you, sweetheart, it’ll be something you never forget. The images he sent me were so damn hot that my Phoenix cried for me to open the door and let him in.
Well, two could play that game. I headed to the shower and turned it on as I stripped down. I may not be ready to get naked with any of the boys, but that didn’t mean a little teasing wasn’t fun. I sent him an image of me pressing him up against the wall, going up on tiptoes, and claiming his mouth for my own. I heard his groan, loud enough to reach me through the door as it also vibrated through my thoughts. He quickly sent me a reply. His hands grabbed my ass, hauling me up and wrapping my legs around him as he turned the tables and pressed me back into that same wall. Wings sprouted from his back, and he imagined me touching them again, only this time he let his arousal press against me as I did, rocking his hips against mine.