Ever After

Chapter 7



Feeling Alive, Finally



I was feeling remarkably better now. It had been a month since the accident by the river. I now actually wanted to eat, wanted to get up in the mornings, and I wanted Will to be with me every minute of the day if possible. Will spent most of his time with me except when he was at school. He had a light class load this session so he was not very busy. The weeks were flying by since we met. We had grown close and an unspoken bond had formed between us.

I had shared my painful story with him about Todd. He knew the darkest hours of my life in detail, and it felt natural to tell him. He never got weird when I told him all the dark thoughts I had at that time. It actually made me feel better in many ways. I had been afraid he would think I was a total fruit loop, but he didn’t judge me. He only held me close and promised no one would ever harm me again. He was dead serious.

I was sitting on the couch in the living room with Will one evening. He had come over to help me study. (I was still doing correspondence classes). We started watching a movie, some crazy horror flick about vampires and zombies stalking people. I hardly noticed, but Will seemed amused. “Myths,” he laughed. I was about to ask him what he meant but he snuggled closer to me and my mind went blank. I put my head on his chest as he gently stroked my hair. I felt a tingle down my spine; his touch was electric to me. I sighed as he lifted my chin up to meet his face, his eyes on mine.

“Are you okay? This doesn’t bother you, me being so close?” I couldn’t find words. I simply smiled and shook my head no. He leaned in closer softly kissing me. I felt like I was floating. He was so gentle but I could feel he was holding himself back. I felt like my head was spinning, his kiss intoxicated me.

“Will,” I whispered. He pulled back immediately. “I didn’t scare you, did I?” I smiled.

“You could never scare me.” I had never felt more safe and more loved than in that exact moment.

I knew why he stopped. He asked if I was okay. He feared being close to him might bring back memories of Todd. I had told him not long after we met how terrified I was that night Todd attacked me. He was the only person who knew how close I had come to killing myself shortly after all of that. Will’s soulful eyes eased my fears as he stroked my cheek tenderly. He had a way of soothing me. I couldn’t explain it and really, I didn’t care how. I just knew he was what I needed to finally heal and to live again.

Will leaned in again running one finger along my throat. He moved closer, kissed my ear, and then kissed my neck deeply. I had never felt anything like it. He paused, his lips still on my neck. “You smell delicious,” he whispered seductively into my hair. He moved to the other side of my neck so swiftly I didn’t realize it until his lips were there, kissing me again. I was like a rag doll, unable and unwilling to tell him to stop. I sure as heck didn’t want him to.

“Will,” I whispered, lost in feelings I had never experienced until now. I pulled him closer if that was even possible without realizing it. I felt him pull away suddenly. I was still attached to his shirt. My eyes were closed. I was breathless.

“We have to stop,” he said as he sighed, running his hand through his hair. I could see it was taking a lot of effort on his part to say that as he clenched his jaw.

“No we don’t.” I protested.

Confusion washed over his face or was it anguish and frustration? All three if I had to guess.

“Please don’t say that. I mean let’s slow it down.” He shook his head, closing his eyes. That was pure frustration. I knew that look. He took a deep breath. “I don’t want to pressure you, and I don’t want to lose control either.” He rubbed his forehead, irritated. “You don’t need that right now. I won’t do that.”

“You didn’t hurt me or scare me Will. I’m a big girl and we aren’t kids here. I am not that fragile, okay?”

He shook his head. “Oh but you are love, very much so… in my arms anyway.” His eyes were dark and cold, not warm and loving like normal. He was extremely serious. I had to admit the way he was looking at me was scaring me a little. I scooted back from him. He wasn’t moving.

“I love you Corrine, very much it’s been centr—” He froze as if he said something bad. I patted his hand.

“Go on Will, please what’s wrong?” He seemed relieved I had just said that, why I had no idea. He didn’t say anything bad.

“It’s just … been a long time since I’ve felt like this.” He paused, thinking. “Well… actually I’ve never felt this way ever about anyone before.” He sighed again. “I don’t want to screw it all up. I can’t take that chance you need more time. You’ve been through so much. I want you to be sure, before we…” He looked at me. I saw a slight blush on his cheeks. “Get really serious.” I was in shock I guess. He was just so damn honorable and he even blushed. I had never seen a guy so unafraid of his emotions. I was speechless, he cared more about how it would affect me, when most guys would have had their clothes half off by now.

I sat back and took a deep breath myself. I wasn’t ever letting him go. He was a rare find among the normally barbaric, sex- crazed guys my age.

“Wow” I grinned at him. “You’re not like any guy I have ever met.” He frowned slightly. He muttered something under his breath. It sounded like, “If you only knew.” I ignored it though. “Most guys, well, you know.” I smiled, embarrassed now.

“Yes I know.” He laughed.

I relaxed and put my head on his shoulder again. I could see he was not as tense now.

“I’ve never been in love till now.” I whispered softly, feeling all emotional. “This is all new to me. I’ve never known the touch of a guy who truly loves me and isn’t just trying to please himself.” I looked away. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes. “I need to be close to you Will. It’s like I can’t breathe if you’re not here.” He ran his hand softly along my cheek again, wiping my tears away with his thumb.

“Then I will never leave you. I will be yours forever if you want me.” He gave me that damn smile that melted my heart every time.

“Forever it is and no exceptions, Mr. Darcy.” I curled up next to him as he put his arms around me.

“It’s agreed then.” He kissed the top of my head. “But let’s not rush into anything you’re not positively ready for.”

“Okay, but I’m getting pretty positive it won’t be very long till I am ready for a more serious relationship.” I sighed.

“That’s a very good thing.” He laughed softly. “A very very good thing.”