The Man She Can't Forget

Chapter FIVE


APPROACHING THE REGENCY-STYLE oak desk in a room that was imbued with the familiar scent of Havana cigars, Gabriel stared down at the cream vellum envelope with his name on it that sat atop the green baize blotter and unconsciously clenched his fists. Recognising the imposing inked script with the letter ‘G’ curled with an exaggerated flourish as his uncle’s hand immediately made him shudder.

He’d been instructed by his uncle’s solicitor that a letter would be waiting for him back at the house and had been asked to read and digest its contents as soon as possible in order to help make up his mind about the unexpected demand in the codicil.

Having already had that document meticulously outlined to him by the solicitor, Gabriel was in no mood to read what would in all likelihood be another disagreeable demand. He’d quickly learned that inheriting the manor was not going to be the straightforward formality that he wanted it to be. But at the end of the day he was an astute businessman as well as a banker, and it just wasn’t in him to relinquish the desire to add to his already considerable fortune if the opportunity presented itself, no matter how testing the task would be.

Having seen the house and its extensive grounds again, he was already certain that he would put it on the market and sell it as quickly as he could before returning to New York. He certainly didn’t want to take up residence here for six months in order to decide what he was going to do with the place, as the codicil stipulated he would have to if he wanted to inherit.

Had his uncle seriously thought that he would? He was sick and tired of being tied to the unhappy childhood memories that dogged his adult life. The sooner he was rid of the house the better. At any rate, Gabriel knew he could hire the best damn lawyer in the business to help him get round that particular complication. And he personally knew of at least two property developers who would all but rip off his arm to get their hands on the place as soon as they got wind that he was selling it.

He didn’t feel an ounce of loyalty either to his uncle or to his forebears when it came to making a profit from the sale. After all, what had his esteemed so-called family done for him?

Feeling impatient, because he’d much rather be spending time with Lara, Gabriel tore open the envelope, unfolded the enclosed letter and hurriedly scanned it.

His heart was thumping hard in shocked disbelief before he even got to the end of the first paragraph.





Dear Gabriel



If you are reading this letter then it must be because I am no longer here. Knowing that must be the case, it behoves me to finally tell you the truth about your mother, Angela. She did not wilfully abandon you, as I once told you. That is the first important thing for you to know. The second is the tragic fact that my beloved sister took her own life.



She had a serious depressive illness that there was no known cure for, and shortly after you were born it became apparent that she was unable to take care of you by herself. She herself needed round-the-clock care and supervision because her illness drove her sometimes to harm herself and her pregnancy exacerbated the tendency.



I lived in fear that she would harm you, too, Gabriel, although with hindsight I should have known that she adored you and would have protected you from harm with her life.



It was a wretched disease that she endured, and I told you that she abandoned you because she begged me to do so should anything happen to her. She was convinced it would be better if you believed that rather than knew that she was sick. She feared that you would get it into your mind that you might have inherited the affliction and that it would stop you from having the successful and happy future that she envisaged for you.




As for your father—I honestly don’t know who he was, Gabriel, because Angela would never say. She did tell me once that she loved him, and that he was good to her, but also that he was married. When she knew that she was carrying you she broke off all contact with the man, and I stopped asking her about him because I could see that it distressed her.



I have not been as good an adoptive father to you as I should have been, Gabriel. I know that now and I deeply regret it. But my own father was an austere and uncommunicative man who never displayed much emotion and I suppose I must have picked up the traits. Consequently I fooled myself into thinking that if I provided every material asset you would need to help you get on in life that would be enough. But the truth is because of my own emotional inadequacy I denied you the one thing that you perhaps needed the most—love and friendship.



I will never know if you can find it in your heart to forgive me for the tragic lie that I told you about your mother, Gabriel, but I hope that given time, if you do, then my beloved sister and I will rest in peace.



Look after the manor house for us, my boy, and fill it with your own dear children. One day the sadness and pain that has hurt us all beyond imagining will, I hope, be banished for good and be replaced with sunshine and laughter instead of heartache.



I did you another grave disservice, Gabriel. I once told you that money would buy you anything you wanted—even love. I was wrong. I hope you know that now and can find the woman of your dreams to make a life with. Home and family—that’s where true happiness lies.



Sincerely



Your uncle, Richard Devenish





As he finished reading, Gabriel felt numb to his very core. The sensation was quickly replaced by a sense of rage and despair the magnitude of which he had never experienced before.

With his hands shaking he watched the neatly folded letter slip out of his loosened grip and drop back onto the green baize blotter. Leaning forward to rest his arms on the desk, he dropped his head into his hands and squeezed his eyes shut tight. So many feelings, thoughts and sensations rose up inside him at the same time that he felt he would drown beneath the crushing weight of them.

Opening his eyes, he murmured, ‘Dear God—why hit me with this now, after all these years? It just doesn’t make sense. It makes no sense whatsoever!’

Unable to stay still for a moment longer, Gabriel shot to his feet, heedlessly scraping the chair against the immaculate parquet floor. Vacating it, he furiously kicked at one of the legs and it crashed to the ground and lay on its back like a floundering whale. He had no inclination to set it right again.

It was hard to breathe suddenly, and the desire to escape both the house and the shocking truth of his tragic past was strong in him—too strong to be overcome or ignored. Snatching up his uncle’s letter, he slammed out of the room and hurried downstairs.

* * *

‘Gabriel, please don’t drive so fast!’ Genuinely frightened at the speed at which her companion was taking the narrow country roads, Lara felt her spine rigid with tension. But she was even more perturbed by the furious tight-lipped expression that hadn’t left his face since he’d sought her out in the kitchen, where she’d been talking to the housekeeper, and unceremoniously declared that they were leaving right away.

‘But what about your coffee and biscuits, Mr Devenish?’ Janet Mullan had asked mournfully, clearly concerned that her new boss wouldn’t be staying for refreshments after all.

Gabriel had looked even more irritated, and his tone had been surly. ‘Don’t stress about it. I’ll be in touch again soon, to let you know what I’m doing. Just do your job and take care of the place in my absence. That’s all you need be concerned about, Mrs Mullan.’

And with that he’d grabbed Lara’s hand and urged her towards the door without pausing even once to explain why.

Lara had already guessed that he’d discovered something in his uncle’s study that had disturbed him. He must have, she thought anxiously, because although he’d been a little quiet he’d seemed more or less okay before he’d gone in there.

‘I’ll get you home safely—you don’t have to worry,’ he said now.

His classic chiselled profile was as coolly perfect as one of Rodin’s marble sculptures and he didn’t even steal a momentary glance round at her.

Twisting her hands together in her lap, Lara sucked in a breath and answered, ‘I’m not worrying so much about your driving, Gabriel, as about your state of mind.’

‘What the hell do you mean by that?’

This time he did deign to glance at her, and his crystalline blue eyes were fierce.

‘I mean I can see that you’re upset, that’s all. Why don’t we stop somewhere and talk? It’s not a good idea to drive when you’re feeling distressed.’

‘Why don’t you let me be the judge of that? And do me a favour, Lara—please don’t treat me like I’m one of your family’s infamous waifs and strays that you can pet and nurse back to health. In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m all grown up now and I can perfectly well take care of myself!’

Gabriel was indeed ‘all grown up now’, she thought privately, but that didn’t mean he had the tools to try and heal whatever had distressed him on his own. He at least needed to talk things out with someone.

Turning her head to glance out of the window at the verdant country scenes that flashed by, she hoped that perhaps later, when he’d calmed down a bit, there might be a chance of reaching him and getting him to confide what had so disturbed him when he’d gone into his uncle’s study. She could only pray that an opportunity would present itself.

Back at her parents’ house, as soon as Lara opened the door Barney leapt up at her, barking an enthusiastic greeting, his short tail furiously wagging as if she’d been gone for years instead of a mere couple of hours. As was her habit, she dropped down to make a fuss of him, tickling him behind the ears, stroking his back and talking to him as though he understood every word she said—which she didn’t doubt that he did.

‘Hello, you little scamp. Have you missed me? I know you don’t like being on your own for long, do you?’

The terrier emitted a short, sharp yap as if to agree.

Staring down at Lara’s slim back and silkily smooth bared shoulders in that far too alluring summer dress she was wearing, Gabriel couldn’t help fantasising about how easy it would be for him to unzip the garment and, using every seductive technique he had—and there were many—coax her into bed with him, rather than let her waste any more time and attention on the family’s dog.

He realised he was becoming more and more reluctant to leave the brunette’s side for even a minute. And after reading the hauntingly disturbing contents of his uncle’s letter he was in no mood to be on his own. The only thing that could possibly help ease his soul-deep distress was Lara, preferably naked and lying beneath him.

As if suddenly remembering he was there, she rose to her feet, her lips curving in a tentative smile. ‘What are your plans for the rest of the day? Are you in a hurry to leave? Only I was wondering if I could get you a cup of coffee, since we didn’t have one back at the manor house.’

Her comment couldn’t help but raise Gabriel’s hopes. ‘Are you angry with me because I didn’t stay at the manor longer with you?’


Her expression softened. ‘Of course I’m not angry. I was just concerned because I could see that you were upset.’

‘Nearly everything to do with that damn house upsets me. But that’s not your problem, Lara. I’ll make it up to you when I take you out to dinner tonight. I’ll book us a table at the Dorchester.’

‘You have nothing to make up to me, Gabriel.’

‘Yes, I do.’

‘In any case, shall we have that coffee now?’

Rubbing his hand round the back of his neck, Gabriel grimaced. ‘I need something a lot stronger than coffee. Have you got any brandy?’

Absently smoothing back the curtain of dark hair that framed her face, Lara frowned. ‘But you’re driving back to your hotel at some point, aren’t you? I won’t give you alcohol if you’re intending to drive, Gabriel.’

‘You really are a little Miss Goody Two-shoes, aren’t you? I bet you never once sat on the naughty chair at primary school, did you?’ he jibed, hating himself for sounding so disparaging when she was only displaying her natural concern for him.

But his ill-mannered retort didn’t seem to faze her. As she lifted her chin he saw her glossy brown eyes were defiant.

‘Call me what you will,’ she said, ‘but I won’t collude with any plan that might potentially harm you or get you into trouble, Gabriel—however much you insist on having your way.’

Not releasing her perturbed gaze, he deliberately stepped towards her. ‘What if I want or need some help?’

He’d knowingly pitched his voice low to engage her intimately, and Lara’s sharp inhalation of breath immediately drew Gabriel’s avid glance to her cleavage. He witnessed the provocative rise and fall of her luscious breasts in the fitted bodice of that sexy pink dress and, God help him, what was a healthy male supposed to do in such testing circumstances?

‘What kind of help?’

A corner of his lips quirked in a teasing smile. ‘I’m sure you must know the answer to that by now, Lara.’

‘You have a worryingly one-track mind—you know that? Do you really think us being intimate is going to help resolve whatever upset you earlier? Something disturbed you when you went into your uncle’s study—don’t you think it might be more help if we discussed that?’

‘No, I don’t. I’m far more interested in what’s going to help me right now, sweetheart. Not in what happened in the past. And, yes, I really do think it would help if we were intimate. The last thing I want you to do is worry about what happened earlier. That’s my problem. Can’t you stop trying to be Lady Bountiful for a minute and just be a woman for a change?’

Her pretty face was immediately stricken. It was obvious he’d touched a nerve, but although he regretted that he might have hurt her it didn’t stop him wanting to seduce her. It might not ease any of the devastation he’d felt on finally learning the truth about his mother, and the lie about her abandoning him that his uncle had colluded with, but fulfilling the intimate connection he craved with Lara would go a long way to help satisfy the burning desire that had mercilessly seized him since seeing her again.

It was a carnal hunger that made it almost impossible for him to think about anything else but being with her in the most intimate way. Had the woman put some kind of spell on him?

‘That was uncalled for, Gabriel. I’m just as much a woman as you are a man and you damn well know it.’

Hands planted firmly on her shapely hips, her dark eyes glinting with fury, Lara had no compunction in displaying her temper—and in truth right then those fulsome breasts of hers, along with her rosily flushed satin cheeks, ensured she was a sight for sore eyes.

Gabriel couldn’t help concluding that Sean’s ‘little sister’ had turned into a woman who would stir lustful longings in a stone, let alone a healthy red-blooded male. It was an honest-to-God mystery why she was still single.

‘And if your criteria for judging femininity means that a woman is only feminine if she agrees to have sex with a man when he tells her that he’s “in need” then you’re seriously deluded.’

‘Of course I don’t think that!’ Now it was his turn to feel aggrieved. ‘You make it sound like I’m some stranger off of the street, instead of someone who’s known and regarded you since you were young. Is it so hard for you to believe that I’m attracted to you, Lara?’

Gabriel was finding it increasingly hard to tamp down his growing frustration at her reticence to be closer. Perhaps he should open up to her a little bit more? Let her know that he had just as much feeling and sensitivity as she had, even though he rarely displayed it? Could he risk revealing such a thing to her?

The thought instantly made him want to retreat in order to protect himself. What if Lara laughed at his confession and concluded it to be a cynical ruse he was using in order to persuade her into bed? What if opening up more personally to her turned out to be a colossal mistake he’d come to regret? He had never yet given a woman that kind of power over him and he didn’t want to start now. If he couldn’t seduce her with his usual prowess and the skill that was innate to him, then he shouldn’t even waste his time trying.

Reaching out to push the door shut behind him, and unknowingly tantalising him with her alluring sun-kissed scent that reminded him of a garden full of honeysuckle, Lara sighed heavily.

‘I don’t want to argue with you, Gabriel, but I am going to make us some coffee. Then I really think we should sit down and talk.’

Frustratingly having to own to losing this particular little battle, but reluctant to walk away, Gabriel ruefully shook his head. ‘Okay, have it your way—at least just for now. Perhaps some coffee will help clear my head. God knows right at this moment it feels like a herd of buffalo are stampeding through it.’

‘That’s probably the jet lag. Unless you have some kind of cold or fever brewing? Let me see.’

Reaching up, Lara laid her hand against his forehead, as if to ascertain his temperature, and her silkily cool touch made Gabriel suck in a surprised and pleased breath. It renewed his hope that she would continue to play nurse should he stick around a bit longer.

‘You feel a little warm, but I don’t think it’s anything to worry about. If you start to feel any worse I’ll give you something to help take your temperature down.’

‘It won’t work.’

‘Why?’

‘Let’s go and have that coffee and maybe I’ll tell you.’

Finding a perfectly legitimate excuse to touch her, when it was becoming more and more difficult for him not to, Gabriel slid his hand beneath her elbow to lead her down the hallway and out into the kitchen.





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