Chapter SEVEN
GABRIEL HAD NO IDEA how long he’d been sleeping. All he knew was that it was like the most delicious dream he could ever imagine finding himself waking up next to a softly slumbering and naked Lara.
Raising himself up onto his elbow, he gently moved the silken strands of dark hair that caressed the side of her face. She was lying on her belly, her lovely face turned to the side. At some point during the afternoon she must have pulled the purple counterpane over them, but it had slid back down to her waist to leave her back and shoulders exposed. It was then that Gabriel saw the perfect facsimile of an ebony and sky blue butterfly, whose delicate wings spread out over the base of her spine. The woman constantly surprised him. Who would have thought that the once shy young girl he’d known all those years ago would have opted for a tattoo, albeit one that only a lover would see?
Shaking his head, Gabriel breathed out a bemused sigh. But it was quickly followed by a stinging flash of jealousy. The thought of Lara being naked with another man, even if it was in the past, made him feel almost physically ill.
Making love with her had been one of the most ecstatic and meaningful experiences of his life since he had shared some of the hurtful secrets about his past with her. That had made the experience truly intimate. Never before had he shared such personal information with a woman. Shuddering, he remembered how he hadn’t been able to hold back his grief when he’d climaxed—recalled too that Lara had gently advised him to ‘just let it all out’ and told him that she was there for him.
Then he remembered that he hadn’t used protection. It hadn’t even crossed his mind. That was another first and a not so acceptable one. Was Lara on the pill? Damn it all, he should at least have thought to ask her. But he had been so consumed by the fever of longing that she aroused in him that rational thinking just hadn’t been on the agenda.
If she were to become pregnant after this, what would he do? What would Lara want to do? Would she agree to an abortion if he asked her? It was such a shockingly disagreeable notion that a knifing pain cramped his chest.
At that precise moment Lara stirred and opened her eyes. Gabriel couldn’t believe he’d forgotten for even a moment how beautiful they were—dark-roast coffee fanned by long, luxurious ebony lashes.
She was staring blankly up at him, as though caught in a spell. Then her gaze fully registered his and she asked softly, ‘Are you all right? I mean, how are you feeling?’
‘I feel good,’ Gabriel answered frankly. ‘Better than I’ve a right to, probably. I can’t help feeling that I’m very fortunate to have found you again, Lara. I guess I must have done something right to please the gods.’
She dimpled. ‘Maybe you’re not all bad boy, then?’
‘Is that how you see me? As a bad boy?’
‘I think you have a little bit of that in you, but rather than detract from it, it just adds to your charisma.’
‘Tell me more.’ He grinned. ‘I’m not averse to hearing about all the qualities that make me attractive to a woman.’
‘What? And pander to your already inflated ego?’
Gabriel chuckled and realised how much he was enjoying just lazing in bed like this with Lara, in the middle of the afternoon, without feeling remotely guilty or having the need to get up and think about work.
‘You don’t have to do that to make me stay here with you, baby. Whatever you’ve got, I’m already addicted to it. That’s why I’m still here.’ Stroking his knuckles gently down her cheek, he smiled. ‘You don’t get rid of me that easily, either. I guess you’re not the only one with a touch of the terrier in her.’
‘Talking of which...’ Lara sat bolt upright, grabbed the silk counterpane and pulled it up over her breasts. At the same time her cheeks flushed pink as though she was suddenly aware that she was naked. ‘I’ve got to walk Barney. I can’t believe I actually fell asleep in the middle of the day. I never do that—even if I’m exhausted.’
‘This seems to be a day of firsts,’ Gabriel observed smilingly.
‘What do you mean?’
‘It’s not important.’ Shrugging his shoulders, he levelled his gaze at her more seriously. ‘However, what is important is the fact that I didn’t use protection when we made love. That’s a pretty major mistake, Lara, and whether you believe me or not it’s one that I’ve never made before.’
Frowning, she told him, ‘You don’t have to worry, Gabriel. I’m on the pill. I should have mentioned it earlier, but we—I...’ Her smile was a shade unsure. ‘We got a bit carried away.’
Gabriel felt as if he’d been sucker-punched and didn’t know why. Then he did. If Lara was taking the contraceptive pill then she must have the occasional lover. If she did, then it must have been quite a while since the last one, because she’d felt exquisitely tight when he’d entered her—as if having sex wasn’t a regular occurrence for her. But the thought hardly reassured him. It made him feel disappointed, when in fact he should be grateful that at least one of them was taking the proper precautions.
Mentally gathering himself, he murmured, ‘Thank God for that.’
Lara flushed and glanced away. Turning back to him, she asked, ‘Do you know what the time is?’
He checked his watch. ‘It’s just gone four.’
‘Four o’clock? You’re joking?’
Amused, Gabriel drawled, ‘Why the panic?’
‘The panic is Barney must be desperate to answer the call of nature and I’ve got to go and have a shower.’
‘That’s an interesting dilemma. And there’s one more thing you have to add to your list of things to do.’
‘What’s that?’
‘You need to kiss me hello.’
Finally succumbing to the irresistible impulse that had been growing steadily stronger from the moment he’d opened his eyes and found Lara lying naked beside him, Gabriel put his hands onto her slim shoulders and pulled her against his chest. The silk cover slipped away from her breasts to expose them, and his senses were immediately aroused by the silken texture of her soft flesh and the peaked nipples pressing against him.
His blood thickened and slowed at the thought of seducing her again. Just as he was about to capture her lips in a drowsily sensual kiss that he hoped would be the precursor to so much more, right on cue the terrier downstairs made his presence known with a round of impatient barking.
‘Oh, Lord. I’ll have to go and see to him. I won’t walk him—I’ll just let him out the back. Sorry.’
With a sheepish glance, Lara wriggled out of his embrace and moved to the edge of the bed. Glancing down towards the floor, as though searching for something, she murmured an audible expletive beneath her breath and huffed out a sigh.
‘What have you lost?’ Gabriel enquired innocently, even as he reached behind her to pick up the bra and panties that had been partially hidden in the folds of the silk counterpane. He quickly slid them under her pillow.
‘My underwear. But never mind.’ Rising to her feet, she hurried across the room to grab a pair of jeans and a pink T-shirt from her wardrobe.
Transfixed by the wholly arresting sight of her bare bottom and long, slim legs, Gabriel found his gaze drawn to the exquisite butterfly tattooed at the base of her spine. Leaning back against the pillows, he drawled, ‘I think this is the best wake-up call I’ve ever had. So what’s the story behind the butterfly?’
Lara was in the midst of pulling up her jeans. She completed the task and turned round. The pink T-shirt she’d retrieved was held protectively over her breasts, as if it was still important to her to preserve her modesty even though she’d just presented an uncensored view of her delectable derrière to Gabriel.
‘Sean sent me a picture of a butterfly just like it in his last letter home before he died. He told me it was extremely rare and that he felt privileged to have seen it.’ With a nervous swallow she glanced briefly down at the floor. ‘I suppose I had the tattoo done as a kind of homage to him. He often used to tease me that I “played safe” and didn’t take enough risks in life. It makes me smile to imagine what he would have said if he’d seen it.’
‘I think it’s a work of art—and so are you, angel. You and the butterfly are an exquisite combination.’
‘Thanks.’
The smile Lara gave him was so endearingly shy that it provoked Gabriel’s carnal hunger even more. In fact he didn’t know why he had even let her out of bed. Broodingly, he watched her hurriedly don the pink T-shirt she’d been holding against her. Braless, the garment was more revealing than she was probably aware. One thing was for sure: he wasn’t about to complain about the fact.
‘I’d better go and see to Barney. I won’t be long.’
His mouth drying, Gabriel couldn’t resist a final comment. ‘So you’re going commando, are you? What are you trying to do? Torment me? Do you know how close I am to hauling you back into bed?’
‘If you do, then who’s going to clean up the mess that Barney will undoubtedly leave on my parents’ prized parquet floor? I can tell you now, Gabriel Devenish, it won’t be me!’
In spite of his frustration Gabriel was still grinning at the quick-fire remark, and devising lascivious ways he might repay her for it, long after Lara had left the room.
* * *
Gabriel’s relief had been plain when she’d told him that she was on the pill and didn’t have to worry. But as Lara stood at the back door that looked out onto the garden and watched Barney scamper across the lawn she knew he must assume she was a lot more experienced than she actually was.
What Gabriel didn’t and couldn’t know was that she took the contraceptive pill to help regulate her monthly periods and ease painful cramps. And, whilst Lara knew it wasn’t a good idea to risk pregnancy when she wasn’t even in a steady relationship, she couldn’t help feeling regret that Gabriel probably would have hated it if he’d made her pregnant. After all, he didn’t know how deep her feelings for him ran, or that she’d surrendered her virginity to him because he was the only man she’d ever loved and she loved him still. Trying to be realistic, she guessed that he probably wouldn’t welcome anything that cramped his high-octane lifestyle—least of all a baby.
Determinedly brushing aside the moisture that surged into her eyes as she recalled how wonderful it had been to make love with him, she unconsciously held her hand over her heart. She still throbbed and tingled where he had touched her, where he had united his body with hers.
Although she’d naturally wanted to help give Gabriel the comfort that he’d needed after learning the devastating truth of how his mother had died, and how his uncle had lied to him to protect her, what Lara had said to him just prior to the event still held true. Their lovemaking had been something that she had wanted, too. Not just wanted but needed. Whatever happened now, or in the future, she would never regret it.
‘Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practise to deceive....’ The famous quote stole into her mind as she thought of the pain and distress the deception had visited on Gabriel—the pain and distress that would probably plague him for the rest of his life. Now he would quite likely sell the magnificent manor house he’d inherited because he would see it only as a lucrative investment he could cash in on and not as a family legacy he could be proud of. How could he when the wounds of his past were so great that no one would blame him for wanting to turn his back on the whole scenario? After he’d sold the place he would probably just return to New York and Lara would never see him again.
‘No.’
It jolted her to realise she’d voiced the protest out loud. But already she was making a vow not to let such a bleak scenario occur if she could prevent it. Somehow there must be a way to get Gabriel to see the gift he would be turning his back on—the gift that might be the key to helping him heal the grievous wounds from his past and make him see that he didn’t need to bear them for ever, that his future could be so much brighter if he would only give himself the chance to explore the possibility and not run away.
Lost in her heartfelt reverie, Lara sighed. Then Barney started to bark and she glanced down to see the terrier scampering past her, no doubt in search of his basket and a nap. It was then she remembered that Gabriel was waiting for her upstairs. She almost wanted to pinch herself to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. It wasn’t necessary. The stinging tips of her tender breasts where Gabriel had kissed and suckled them were an apt reminder that this was no dream but instead a heart-poundingly wonderful reality.
Hugging herself, she headed out into the hall and quickly returned upstairs.
To her surprise, Gabriel wasn’t in bed where she’d left him. Just as Lara sensed her stomach plunge at the thought that he’d slipped away whilst she’d been keeping an eye on the dog, the en-suite bathroom door opened and he stepped out, fully dressed and combing his fingers through his lightly tousled chestnut hair. His charismatic smile was both rueful and rakish at the same time.
Before she could ask what was going on he strode over to her and possessively wound his arms round her waist. Even though his embrace instantly rendered her weak with pleasure and desire, Lara suspected her secret hopes about how they might spend the rest of the afternoon weren’t going to come to fruition.
‘What’s wrong? Why—why are you dressed?’
‘I had a phone call from New York while you were downstairs. Sweetheart, I’m afraid I’ve got to go back.’
‘You mean back to New York?’
Grimacing, Gabriel nodded. ‘They’ve got a real crisis on their hands on the trading floor. They want me to go back and help sort it out.’
‘But what about the legalities you said you needed to deal with here? I mean the ones concerning the house?’
‘They’re just going to have to wait. Right now my priority is getting back to New York. The sooner I leave, the sooner I’ll be back.’
Lara stared into his captivating blue eyes and couldn’t help offering up a silent relieved prayer that he intended to return. But she still didn’t want him to go. ‘So you are intending on coming back, then?’
Lowering his head, he captured her lips in a slow, seductive kiss that melted her and made her long for more. The touch of his mouth against hers was oh so drugging and sensual that she thought there couldn’t be a woman alive who wouldn’t surrender to the magic of it without the heartfelt hope that there would be more—much more—to follow.
‘Of course I’m coming back. Do you honestly think I’d turn my back on the treasure that I’ve found?’
‘You mean your family’s manor?’
Gabriel tipped up her chin with his knuckle. ‘No. That’s not the treasure I mean at all, angel.’
As Lara stared back at him her heart skipped a beat.
‘You make it very hard for me to leave when you look at me with those big brown eyes of yours like that, but nonetheless—’ He abruptly dropped his hand and said briskly, ‘I’d better be off. I’ve got to get back to my hotel and pack a bag. Can you give me your phone number?’
Retrieving his mobile from his jeans pocket, he looked at her expectantly.
‘What do you want it for?’
‘Do you really need to ask me that? So that I can let you know when I’m coming back, of course.’
‘Oh.’
The number duly given, Lara gasped when once again Gabriel drew her into his arms.
‘I know you’ve only been back a short time but it’s going to feel strange not having you around,’ she admitted.
‘I feel the same, sweetheart.’ Smiling ruefully, he cupped his hand to her cheek. ‘Now I really do have to go.’
He moved across the room to the door and opened it. Then he pivoted, and the expression on his carved face was indisputably serious as he glanced back at her.
‘I don’t want you to be lonely but I hope you won’t think of being with anyone else while I’m gone?’
Feeling her cheeks flame red, Lara couldn’t help but be offended. Her telling him she was on the pill had made him naturally assume she was sexually active. The thought made her shiver with distaste, especially when she had always believed that the most precious thing you could give to the man you loved was your virginity. Yes, the idea was outdated and old-fashioned but Lara made no apology for it.
‘Do you honestly think I would want to be with someone else after what we’ve just shared, Gabriel? I know we haven’t committed to making our relationship serious or anything, but I’m not the kind of woman who operates like that. I’m loyal. How would you feel if I asked you the same question?’
His expression thoughtful, he answered soberly. ‘You need have no worries on that score. Apart from the fact that I’ll be too busy working, the only woman I’ll be thinking about while I’m in New York is you, Lara.’
She released a soft breath of relief and followed it with a smile. ‘That’s all right, then. Have a safe journey and let me know that you’ve arrived safely, even if it’s just a text.’
The corners of Gabriel’s eyes crinkled with pleasure. ‘Of course. It’ll be nice to know that someone I care about is thinking of me while I’m away. That’s another first.’
Feeling elated by his assertion that she was someone he cared about, Lara felt the rest of his poignant comment squeeze her heart. How had he felt when he was little and knew there was no one there to look out for him and give him a cuddle when he got home from school? A hired nanny could never have replaced a loving parent.
Right then he looked so endearing that Lara wondered how she didn’t run to him and beg him not to go. But she knew that she shouldn’t reveal that she cared as much as she did in case it made him want to back off a little. That was the very last thing she wanted to happen.
‘Well, here might be another first for you, Gabriel. I’m really going to miss you when you’re gone.’
He gifted her with another devastating smile that she wouldn’t easily forget.
‘I’m going to miss you, too, baby.’ Raising a rueful dark eyebrow he opened the door and went out.
* * *
The days following Gabriel’s departure dragged by interminably. Lara’s initial excited optimism and belief that he would return, and that when he did he might consider making their rekindled association more serious, started to evaporate distressingly.
Since he’d texted her that he’d arrived safely in New York her mobile had been worryingly silent. To add to her worry and concern, memories of that long-ago party from her youth, when Gabriel had rejected her in preference for the tall slim blonde who had been his tutor, returned to haunt her painfully and made her fear that he wouldn’t keep his promise if someone more attractive came on the scene when he was back in New York.
When her parents returned from France Lara stayed on for a further couple of days to satisfy herself that they were coping and to give them whatever support she could. But she also stayed on because her family home now seemed indelibly imbued with Gabriel’s presence. She almost feared to leave it in case it signified shutting the door on the magical and heartfelt time they had spent together there—a repeat of which might never happen.