The Cutting

Near Stockton Springs, they stopped for coffee and a couple of candy bars at an all-night gas station. Neither had slept in nearly forty-eight hours. They were both exhausted. The last thing they needed was for one or the other of them to fall asleep at the wheel. McCabe filled the tank. Then they switched around and he drove.

He checked his watch – 2:00 A.M. Casey would be asleep in Boston now. In a big bed in a fancy hotel. Anyway, he hoped she was sleeping and not lying awake worrying. He wondered if she and Sandy were sharing a bed. If so, he hoped Sandy had given her a choice about that. He also hoped Sandy hadn’t made any remarks about Casey being too old to still be sleeping with Bunny.

His cell phone rang. He glanced at the caller ID. Shockley. He flipped the phone to speaker mode so Maggie could hear. ‘Hello, Tom. I guess you heard about Kane.’

‘You’re damned right I did. Good work. Great work.’ Shockley sounded excited. ‘I issued standing orders for Dispatch to wake me if and when we got this bastard. Can you let me have a few of the details? I’m talking to the press in a little while.’ McCabe smiled, imagining visions of Blaine House, the governor’s mansion, dancing like sugarplums through Shockley’s overeager brain. ‘Mike, can you hear me?’

‘Yes, Chief. By the way, you’re on speaker. Maggie’s here.’

‘Fine. Can you give me any of the details? I need to get this right.’

McCabe took Shockley through the whole thing, starting with his call to Priscilla Pepper and ending with Kane’s final fall to the stone floor and Cassidy being found alive.

‘Was the scalpel still in his hand when he died?’

‘Yes,’ said McCabe. ‘It was.’

‘I saw the whole thing, Chief,’ added Maggie. McCabe glanced at her, knowing she’d only come out of the room in time to see Kane go over the rail. ‘Use of deadly force was justified,’ she said.

‘Well, thank God for that,’ Shockley replied. ‘The media briefing starts in about twenty minutes. Will you two be back by then?’

‘No. We’re still the other side of Belfast,’ said Maggie. ‘A couple of hours out.’

‘Okay. I’ll handle it. By the way, Kevin Comisky’s funeral’s scheduled for three o’clock Monday. Full departmental honors. I hope you’ll be there.’

‘We’ll be there,’ said Maggie.

‘Can you let me have his wife’s address and phone number?’ asked McCabe. ‘I’d like to call on her.’

‘I’ll have Deirdre e-mail it to you.’

‘Thanks.’ Then, not wanting to listen to Shockley anymore, McCabe hit the off button before the chief could answer.

He looked over at Maggie. ‘Use of deadly force was justified? That’s what I’m supposed to tell Casey when she asks if I had to kill the guy?’

‘Yes. That’s what you’ll tell her because we both know that’s the truth. You had no choice.’ She looked back at him. ‘Just like you told me the other day, it was a clean kill. It needed to be done.’

He felt Maggie’s eyes studying him as they drove on in silence. ‘Now what are you thinking about?’ she asked.

‘I don’t know. Nothing. Sometimes I just wonder if Casey wouldn’t be better off living a life where phrases like “clean kill” and “justifiable use of force” didn’t enter the lexicon. Where she wouldn’t have to lie awake nights wondering if her father’s gonna come home dead or alive.’

‘I can’t help you with that.’

‘I know.’

‘I would if I could.’

‘I know that, too,’ said McCabe.

‘I just think you should stop torturing yourself. You’re one of the good guys. You always will be.’

He reached out from the wheel and took her hand and squeezed it. She squeezed back. He remembered her brown eyes gazing down at him in Tallulah’s and smiled. ‘You know what else I’m thinking about? I’m thinking about a kiss I got from a really good friend of mine the other day in Tallulah’s, and I’m wondering what she might have been thinking at the time.’

‘Oh, that,’ said Maggie. ‘That was just an impulsive thing on your friend’s part. Don’t let it worry you. Like she said at the time, you’re taken.’

He let go of her hand. ‘Yup,’ he said. ‘I guess I am.’ He wondered if Kyra would be waiting for him in the apartment. He was hoping she was.

They traded places again at Augusta, and Maggie drove the rest of the way in silence. McCabe snoozed. It was still dark when they reached the Eastern Prom. Maggie turned the Crown Vic into the parking lot behind the condo. McCabe got out and headed for the door. When he got there he looked back to offer a final wave, but Maggie was already gone. He entered the white Victorian and climbed the stairs to the third floor. He knew that if Kyra was there, he would wake her and they would make love. He knew she’d be happy with that. Afterward maybe they’d sleep for a while. After they woke from that sleep, they’d make love again.

McCabe pulled off his shoes on the landing, entered the apartment, and padded silently across to the bedroom. He pushed open the bedroom door. Somehow, in the darkness he could see Kyra, sitting up in bed, waiting for him. Letting the sheet slip from her naked body, she held out her arms. ‘Welcome home,’ she said softly.

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