Say You Love Me by J. S. Cooper
Prologue
Sally
Cody Brookstone. My first love. He’s my best friend’s brother. The man of my dreams. He’s everything I’ve ever wanted and yet, he barely knows I exist as more than a friend. He is the most handsome man I’ve ever seen in my life: all six feet? two inches of muscular brawn, dark blond hair, hazel eyes that go from green to brown on a whim, and a smile that lights up my heart. His very presence does things to me that I can’t explain. Cody Brookstone is the man I’ve had a crush on for what seems like forever. There are so many declarations I want to make to him. Declarations that make my heart flutter. Declarations like: “I will wait for you because I don’t want anyone else.”
“I will wait for you because I’m a fool.”
“I will wait for you because the feeling in my heart is greater than anything I’ve ever felt before in my life.”
“I will wait for you because the smile on your face makes me happy when I’m sad.”
“I will wait for you because I love you.”
I wanted to tell him all of those things. I wanted him to know how much I loved him. I wanted him to know I would wait a lifetime for him. I would have told him all of those things, too, if I thought it would mean anything. All I needed was for him to say he loved me. Three simple words. That’s all I needed. “I love you.” That’s all I needed to hear. At least that’s what I thought in the beginning.
Have you ever been in love? Have you ever been in love so bad that it hurts you in places that you didn’t even know existed inside of you? Have you ever thought of someone so much that you thought you could read their mind? That somehow they were a part of you, that indelibly you were linked by something greater than words or feelings or actions? That your connection was created by God himself? Have you ever had that feeling? That feeling where you feel so high, so happy, so powerful, just being around them? Their smile makes you smile. Their laugh lights up your life, so that nothing could dim it. Absolutely nothing. Just being there with them, just talking to them, touching them, seeing them, knowing them gives you something that you can’t explain. That’s power. Real power. And that power is dangerous. It’s dangerous because you lose yourself to that feeling. And sometimes when you lose yourself in that way to the wrong person…well, sometimes, you never get yourself back.
I’ve experienced that love. Great love. Love so powerful that I couldn’t eat or sleep for days. Only, he didn’t love me. He didn’t want me. He didn’t feel the same way. And the pain that I felt, the pain I carried inside of me, well it nearly broke me. You see, it didn’t make sense to me. How can one love someone so greatly and they don’t feel a thing? It doesn’t make sense. It didn’t make sense. I thought that was the worst of it. I thought that was the end of the world, but I was wrong. I thought Cody Brookstone breaking my heart was the end of it all, but really it was only the beginning.
You see, I’ve gone and found myself in an even more precarious situation. A situation that has called everything I thought I knew into question. A situation that has made me doubt every feeling and every emotion I’ve ever had. A situation that makes me wonder what true love really is. Everything I believed in has come crashing down around me.
Now I don’t know if him telling me he loves me will mean anything.
Now I don’t know if my world will ever be the same again.
Now I don’t know what I feel for Cody Brookstone and I don’t know if I can find it in my heart to figure out the answers to any of my questions before it’s too late.
Part 1
Chapter 1