“Stop calling me that!” She rummaged in her bag for a moment, pulled her keys out, and added, “I’m going home now. To my husband. I don’t want to see you again, and as far as keeping secrets from Shane Gibson, I’m not sure that’s even possible. He’s the kind of man who seems to know everything that’s going on.”
The displeasure written all over her face, coupled with the wariness flashing in her eyes and the bite in her words, hurt more than I ever thought it would. Where was the girl I’d loved more than anyone before or after her? I’d at least assumed she’d still be in there somewhere, giving me a sliver of an opportunity to show her the truth of the situation.
I reached for her, curling my hand tightly around her forearm. As our skin connected, a spark blazed through me, jolting long-forgotten memories to the surface. Or maybe they were buried in an effort to move on. Her eyes sliced to mine. I ignored the warning in them, in much the same way I’d done many times during our relationship. It was what Tenille and I were good at—ignoring signals and pushing our way in or out of situations. It didn’t always work in our favour, but that never stopped me from trying.
“Do you remember the day we were married? I promised you forever that day, and you cried as you promised me the same. It was the first time I ever saw you cry, and it made me understand how deep you were in with me, because getting you to that point had taken me some hard fucking work, and I hadn’t always been sure you really wanted to marry me.” I paused for a moment, searching her face to make sure she was still with me. She was. In fact, she held her breath while she took in everything I said. “I fucked up our forever, Tenille. I’m sorry for that. But I’ll be damned if I’ll sit back and watch any more of your life get screwed over. When I tell you that Gibson isn’t who he shows to the world, I need you to remember the trust you used to have in me and trust what I’m saying now, too. I need you to know that even though you and I don’t have a forever anymore, I never stopped loving you. And anything I’m trying to do now to help you is because of that. Dig deep, Tee, and think back to who I used to be before I left. For you, I’m still that person.”
I laid myself out in a way I hadn’t had to in over a decade, hoping like hell that she’d respond and give me an inch.
But she didn’t.
Reefing her arm out of my hold, she shook her head like a mad woman. “You took all my trust, Aiden, and threw it in my face. And it makes me question everything about you and who you were before you walked away. You knew everything about me and all the shit I’d been through, so I feel like if you really loved me like you say you did, you would never have left me alone to raise Charlotte and deal with shit on my own.” She drew a long breath as her fight faded. Staring at me with eyes that revealed her turmoil, she added, “Just leave again. We don’t need you here.”
No fucking way was I backing down. She’d just have to find a way to deal with me being around.
“No, you do need me here, Tenille. I’ve had a guy keeping an eye on you and Charlie since I left—”
She frowned as her fight flared up again. “What the fuck? Like a stalker watching over us?”
I kept my own fight in check. I’d forgotten just how argumentative my wife could be. Sometimes, it had been like going to war every day with her irrational thoughts and emotions that she flung at me. “No, like a private investigator who made sure you guys were okay. He checked in with me regularly, letting me know how you both were.”
“Jesus, Aiden, that’s a little extreme, don’t you think?”
“Clearly not, if the shit you and Craig are in at the moment is anything to go by.”
She straightened, pushing her shoulders back. I remembered this move—it was what she did when she tried to appear confident. What it told me, though, was that whatever came out of her mouth next would be a lie. “If you’re talking about the fights we’ve been having, they’re nothing. We love each other and are working things out.”
I narrowed my eyes at her. “I’m talking about that, along with your drinking, Charlie’s school grades going down, and the money missing from your bank account. Are you working all that out, too?” My last words came out a little too harshly, but fuck, this wasn’t shit to be avoided.
She stilled. “Your PI is a nosy bastard. None of those things are your business.”
“I would argue with that. They are all my business because you and Charlie are my business, and I plan to get to the bottom of every single one of them. With or without your help.”
Silence for a beat. And then—“You know what would have been nice? If you’d been this intent on getting to the bottom of shit fourteen years ago when you and I were having problems. When you tell me to think back to who you were then, and to know you’re that same man for me now, it doesn’t mean much, because back then all you focused on was working. You were hardly home, and when you were, you and I spent most of that time arguing.” She jabbed a finger against my chest. “So don’t come back here now and tell me you know all about my marriage to Craig and the shit my family is in, and that you’re going to fix it, when you couldn’t even fix your own shit years ago.” She turned to get in her car, leaving me staring after her with no comeback.
She was right. I hadn’t been there for her when she’d needed me. I’d been so fucking focused on providing for our family that I’d ended up neglecting them. And as the weeks and months passed, and the small wounds between us had turned to gaping ones that I didn’t even know how to begin to fix, it just became easier to fight with her or to retreat completely. At the end, we’d both been like casualties of war who stared at each other through vacant eyes, hurling words intended to hurt the other because that felt like the only way to allow the pain out.
The guilt I carried over that and over leaving them never eased up. It was like a hammer chipping away at me all the fucking time. I was certain that the only way I’d ever get rid of it was to make things right with Tenille again. We couldn’t go back, but we could sure as fuck go forward. But only if I could convince her to let me in.
Chapter 4
Hyde