My dad was going to kill me.
I swallowed and grabbed my stuff, checking to make sure the hallway was clear.
I winced with the first step. I was soaking wet and sore between my legs. That was from me-my blood and juices and... him.
I'd just thrown my innocence away and for what? I was sure I was just another notch in his belt. Kyle clearly knew what he was doing. He was good enough at it!
Way, way too good.
I'd just been plucked by a master. I realized I'd completely lost my head. I couldn't blame it on a handful of beers either. I wasn't drunk. He'd even asked permission.
This was a matter of me being naive and him being an expert seducer.
The worst part was that I'd actually felt like he cared about me when he was on top of me... inside me. I groaned. He'd come inside me! How could I be so dumb?
Dumb dumb dumb!
I slipped my shoes on as I hustled down the hallway to the stairway. I looked back over my shoulder. It was all clear.
Thank God. He hadn't seen me. I could get away without a confrontation.
He'd said something about going again... I shivered. That would have been horrible. He would have touched me until I was quivering again. Then pushed himself inside me, kissing me while he took everything I had. Sweet, hot, delicious... and just compounding my mistake.
Yeah. Horrible. Like I said.
I ran down the stairs and pulled out my phone to check the time. If I caught the bus in the next ten minutes I could be home before Dad. He had his alumni planning dinner tonight, so I could do it.
Mom would be harder to sneak past, but easier to convince. She was kind and generous, not a hard ass like my dad.
But neither one of them would be pleased by the smell of beer on my breath. Never mind the fact that I'd definitely forgotten my panties in Kyle's dorm room. I had the sudden, horrible thought that people could tell I was going commando. I felt naked and exposed.
For the first time I understood what the 'walk of shame' meant.
I hit the pavement running, ignoring my embarrassment. It was a brisk evening, the air cooling my warm face. I now had nine minutes to make the bus. I turned the corner and could see the stop just outside campus.
Oh no!
I panicked as I stared at the bus stop in horror. The bus was already there. For once, the bus was actually early!
With a burst of superhuman strength born 100% from panic, I ran faster than I'd ever run before. If I'd been thinking clearly I would have been proud of myself. I had been on the track team in high school, before my boobs got too big to make it comfortable.
Running my butt off with no bra. Not to mention I was wearing these strappy platform shoes. Never again, Belinda!
I screeched to a halt, nearly passing the bus entirely. The doors began to close. In slow motion I practically threw myself towards them and-Squeezed through.
I smiled at the driver and flashed my pass. I tried to act normal, as if I hadn't just slid through the doors in the nick of time. I must have looked crazy, judging from the odd look the driver gave me. But I didn't care. I'd made it.
I sank into a seat and contemplated the mess I'd made of everything.
Losing my virginity wasn't so bad.
I'd wanted experience and I'd gotten it. For a long time I'd felt like a freak, the only virgin I knew. It was well past time I fooled around with a boy. But I'd been careless, assuming he would take care of birth control.
Kyle had me so turned on that I hadn't thought about anything, let alone playing it safe. One look from those hard blue eyes and I'd melted. I thought back over the evening, cringing. I hadn't said no to one thing he'd asked from the moment I met him.
Sure, maybe I was getting back at my dad a little bit. I was starting to get tired of the rules. Some rules were fine. My dad just had too many.
But it was more than that. Kyle was seductively dangerous. To me anyway. Not to my body. He'd been gentle and caring. No, he was dangerous to my peace of mind.
I sunk down into the seat. I just hoped I didn't run into him again on campus. If I saw him, I would just walk the other way. He didn't have my number or anything. I couldn't repeat my stupid mistakes. And I knew it would be even harder to resist him the next time. The farther I stayed away, the better.
And if I did see him and couldn't avoid talking to him, well, he'd learn that I had a cold side.
Cold, hard and tough.
Ha. Ha. Ha.
Who was I kidding? I was a softy. Stupid. Naive. That's how I'd ended up in this mess!