“I can’t walk down the aisle. I have no one to give me away. Who thought of this? It’s like a big missing piece. I can’t go alone with everyone looking at me. It’s depressing.”
I anticipated Blakely recoiling in horror when she realized her massive embarrassing mistake. But she kind of smiled a little, then she smiled a lot.
“Surprise,” she said quietly, holding her hand out to the side. I followed the line of her arm to a gray-haired man in a tuxedo. He stood perfectly still, a vision of diplomacy and courtesy. His eyebrows were still dark brown, and blue and brown coexisted in his eyes like dual mood rings.
“Dad?”
“Hi, button.”
That was his voice, his stature, his posture. It was him. His presence cracked through the barriers I’d built around him.
“Dad?” I repeated.
He held his hand out for me. My father. He hated me. I knew he did. But he was here, at this ridiculous surprise wedding.
“Let’s walk a straight line together,” he said. “Then let’s dance. Then you, me, and your mother—”
“Mom’s here?”
I was reduced to simple thoughts and sentences. Nicole could have gotten deeper sentiments out.
“Of course we are. We love you, button.”
Past him, down the stone steps, and over a short flagstone path, a hundred people waited. Past those hundred people stood Brad Sinclair in a tuxedo. With full-length pants. The whole getup. Even the tie.
“Can we go already?”
I had forgotten about Nicole at the top of the steps in her poufy white dress and basket of rose petals. She wore light-up pink sneakers that were never meant to be paired with a flower girl dress. Her brow was knotted, and she looked like a holy terror.
“She has your mouth,” my father said.
“That’s impossible.”
He looked back at me dryly. “I was talking about what comes out of it.”
His mouth twitched with a smile, and he gave me his arm. I slid my hand around it at the elbow, and he led me down the stairs. In front of us Nicole liberally covered the center aisle in white petals.
“I’m glad we came,” he whispered to me. “You look beautiful.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
Nicole got impatient in the last three steps. She held out her basket and dumped the remaining flower petals at her father’s feet. Everyone laughed, and when she hugged his legs, he laughed with them.
“He seems all right,” my father said.
Brad picked up Nicole and held her to one side as I got closer. He waited for me with his daughter and my father patted my hand. I wanted to thank him for giving me the wedding I was afraid to create for myself. For completing wishes I didn’t dare have. I felt a tightening circle around me. A bond of family that protected me from harm. A bond I would use everything in my power to protect. We completed a cycle of love and protection passed from father to daughter, generation to generation.
Brad took my hand and I was whole.
EPILOGUE TO THE EPILOGUE
NICOLE
My pony is the best pony in the entire world.
Her name is California Pie.
I love my pony and new mommy and daddy.
All four of us are very happy together ever after.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
So many people.
I have to mention my husband first. His help with this book was in his quiet support of whatever I’m doing. My daughter inspired Nicole and rounded out my life the minute she was born.
I have to mention Jana Aston, who read Shuttergirl and, in a Facebook post, suggested Brad needed a baby. The second her comment appeared on my screen, I knew she was right.
I had a great time working on the outline with my agent, Amy Tannenbaum. Without her guidance, I never would have gotten it together.
My content editor, Angela Marshall Smith, is completely brilliant at finding the things that work and making sure I turn the volume up all the way on them.
Jean Siska, as always, helped with the verisimilitude of the legal issues in the book.
Kayti McGee, with her sharp, quick-thinking brain, created the tone for the celebrity blog posts.
Jenn Watson poked me with a stick to get me to the finish line. She fed me avocados and cheese. I would have been late without her.
My girls Lauren, Laurelin, and Kristy—thank you for giving me a safe place to talk about all the bookish things I can’t share anywhere else.
Thank you to Charlotte and Chris at Montlake, and the entire Amazon team for landing me my first publisher contract after 24 years of trying.
Everyone who supported me, thank you.