Aliens Abroad

“If we do it right, it won’t matter.” That was my prevailing theory, anyway. “Remember, we have to encircle the system from six different directions. Stay aware of where the others are—having to deviate from your path will slow us down and I’m sure I don’t need to explain why hitting into each other will be the definition of Worst Save Ever.”

“What’s life without risk?” Kristie asked with a grin. “If you feel like you’re slowing down, Kitty, just let me know. We can discuss all the Code Name: First Lady sequels I’m thinking of suggesting to Jürgen.”

“You’re hilarious.” Took the requisite deep breath and let it out slowly. “Jerry, give us the countdown, and remember to open our door, please and thank you.”

“Will do, Commander. Your favorite flyboy lives to serve.”





CHAPTER 109


JERRY STARTED AT TEN. We all moved to stand near the container with Space Lucinda in it. We were in position on the eight count. Giving us what felt like a hell of a lot of time to wait. We chose our paths in the next six seconds, which sort of seemed like six minutes, possibly hours.

“Two,” Jerry finally said. “And . . . one.” The hatch opened and my music changed to “Into the Great Wide Open” by Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers. True enough—we were all sucked out, the heavy lead container included.

The container zoomed off, so knew Charlie was doing his thing. The rest of us scattered and started running, which we could do because of ACE and Lilith.

Christopher had the longest path—he was going around the system in an oval that meant he was above and below the elliptic plane. Mossy had the elliptic plane of the intact planets. My path was around the middle and was, therefore, the shortest. Butler and Kristie were crisscrossing along the diagonals, so to speak. Basically, the five of us were trying to look like a super atom, the humor of which was not lost on me. And Wruck was circling the sun, creating what we hoped was a vortex that would pull Space Lucinda into the center of Helix. So he was the nucleus. Doing it all for science!

Actually, we were doing it all in order to create enough momentum for the sun to be able to reverse course and head back toward the galaxy, while not leaving any of its satellites behind. And once we achieved that, then the hard stuff would start. We were being helped greatly by ACE and Lilith and, I suspected, even more greatly by Algar. God helped those who helped themselves, presumably so that he could pretend it wasn’t him doing it.

Charlie, meanwhile was moving the lead container into the center of the Puzzle Planet and, the moment he did so, the other kids were helping move the pieces back together while Abigail and Mahin were gathering space dust, asteroids, and tiny parts of exploded planets to create a “whole” orb.

Because they were inside of the six of us, ACE and Lilith were covering the entire solar system in a spinning form of Tupperware. Or perhaps that was just how I was thinking of it.

Got into the groove quickly because there was nothing like having the Superconsciousness Boost. Because of that, even as we started to go faster and faster, getting up to well beyond Ludicrous Speed, we could still see each other and the things in the solar system.

Could also see the Milky Way. It looked far away. A lot farther than it had looked on the picture. Scary far. Stopped looking at it. Steering was going to fall to Space Lucinda and Wruck, with a likely assist from Charlie, at least if I knew my son at all.

Concentrated on running as fast as possible and focused on the Puzzle Planet, not the Milky Way. The Puzzle Planet was well on its way to Helix. So far, so good.

You must go faster, Lilith said. All of you. Stop watching everything else and focus on your paths.

Tried to put on more speed. I was a sprinter. This was a sprint. Sure, a long-distance sprint, but a sprint nonetheless. Felt like I was going my fastest.

Kitty, you must find more speed. The others are now at the speed they need to be. You aren’t, and if you don’t speed up, the chances of you colliding with the others is high.

Had no idea where I was going to get more reserves of speed. My music changed to “A Question of Lust” by Depeche Mode. Not what I’d have expected. But I focused on the lyrics. This was a love song, about a how a couple survived challenges, how they stayed together. If I didn’t do my part, my family wasn’t going to be together ever again.

Stopped trying to go faster to save the galaxy and just ran for the joy of running, for the love of my family and friends, and for the chance to have sex with Jeff again.

There, Lilith said. You’re perfect. Be prepared—the planet has been captured in the orbit John Wruck has created.

I could keep this speed going now, so I did, while DJ Algar spun “Born to Run” by Bruce Springsteen, “Run Baby Run” by Garbage, and “Fox on the Run” by Sweet. I watched the Puzzle Planet start spinning around the sun, faster and faster, until it was a blur. Then it was gone.

What happened?

Don’t slow, Lilith warned. What we wanted to happen has happened. The planet protected the container just long enough.

Made sure I kept on running at the same speed I had been. But I still watched Helix. So I saw the sun flare then contract. Um . . .

Lucinda is containing the sun’s thermonuclear reaction. Be ready. In a moment we will be moving and you will need to continue running.

The sun looked less red. Not a lot less, but it no longer seemed at the end of its line. Felt the pull, as the sun started to move. The music changed to “You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)” by Dead or Alive and I knew we were ready.

A lattice of light went around the system. Which made it look like an oval Z’porrah power cube. And the six of us running were the ones who were going to trigger it.

We had to be in the right positions to trigger, so we had to keep running until we were all set at the right place and the right time, which was going to take precision. Thankfully, we had ACE and Lilith along to ensure that we could be precise.

Because of the sun’s movement combined with those of us running and whatever it was the kids were doing, the solar system started to tip as if it was rolling. Which was what we wanted.

Now, Lilith said, as my music changed to Van Halen’s “Jump” and we all jumped on her cue. Saw the power oval trigger.

Heard ACE and Space Lucinda give directions to the others, tiny course adjustments to account for the system itself starting to tumble through space. Because I was covering the middle, I had no corrections to make, just the onus to keep on running as fast as I could. My music changed to “I’ll Tumble 4 Ya” by Culture Club. Fitting.

Figured that the music and time weren’t necessarily going in a linear fashion. Wasn’t sure how long it took the Flash to run around an entire solar system, but had to figure it was more than a second. Then again, even with Lilith inside of me, could barely spot Christopher as anything but a blur.

“We’re moving toward the galaxy,” Butler said. Was hella impressed that he could talk while doing this. I certainly wasn’t planning to try running my yap. “And we’re on our side, so to speak, which could be good or bad.”

Risked one syllable. “Why?”

“Because we’re going to hit the galactic disk straight on, with our solar disk slicing into it.”

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