When She Loves (The Fallen, #4)
Gabrielle Sands
CHAPTER 1
CLEO
“Shit,” I mutter as I stare at the pregnancy test in Gemma’s hand.
It’s positive. She’s pregnant.
My sister brushes past me, looking like she might throw up, and sinks onto a chair by her bed. The test falls out of her hand. “This is a disaster,” she moans.
Disaster? No. A disaster would be spilling wine on a white designer dress you borrowed from a friend, or your phone battery dying while you’re out in the middle of the woods at a rave.
This is far more than a disaster.
This is a clusterfuck. Dictionary definition.
Gem’s wedding to Rafaele Messero is in just a few days, and she’s pregnant.
With another man’s baby.
Ras Sorrentino loves her. He’d do anything for her. But Gem left him so that she could carry out her “duty to the family” by marrying Rafaele—the most dangerous mobster in New York.
I swear, our good-for-nothing father’s greatest accomplishment is managing to brainwash my sister into believing his bullshit.
Papà’s life hangs on this marriage. Literally. Rafaele is the only reason Papà isn’t rotting in prison right now, but if he can get Papà out, he can put him back in just as easily. The price for my father’s freedom is Gemma—a daughter for Rafaele to marry so that he can be named as Papà’s successor.
Rafaele is already the don of his family, but I guess it’s not enough for the greedy bastard. He wants to be the don of ours too. So he needs a Garzolo wife. And according to his ass-backward traditions, she’s supposed to be a virgin.
I wince. Rafaele might’ve been raised in a traditional, religious family, but something tells me immaculate conception is going to seriously test any belief he has.
“What am I going to do?” Gemma whispers, her wide eyes fixated on the test lying on the ground. My sister has always been the strong one but right now she looks like she’s about to collapse. “Rafaele and Papà need me. Papà will force me to get rid of the baby.”
She’s right. They do need her. The men in our lives are incapable of cleaning up their own messes. If it were up to Papà, Gemma would be wheeled into a clinic by the end of the night, but perhaps…
“Rafaele wouldn’t do that,” I say. “You know how traditional his family is.”
My sister shakes her head. “Don’t be naive. In our world, they only respect the traditions that serve them. Rafaele won’t raise another man’s baby.” Her lips tremble. “I don’t know what to do. I never should have left Ras. You’re right, Cleo. I should have been brave and stayed. Ras loved me, and I broke his heart because I was so damn scared that one day he’d regret sacrificing so much for me. I was so insecure and worried about the future that I completely missed what was right in front of me.”
My heart clenches. That’s how people act when they’ve never been allowed to put themselves first. They self-sabotage because they believe they’re not worthy of happiness.
Oh, Gem. Her whole life, she’s been molded by our parents to be the perfect daughter—obedient and self-sacrificial. They’ve succeeded spectacularly.
She drags her nails down her cheeks. “Ras and I could have had a family together. We would have been happy. Instead, I fucked everything up.” A tear slips out of her eye, followed by another. Her heartbreak is so clear, so devastating, that I feel an echo of it inside my own chest.
She doesn’t deserve to suffer like this.
I’m a shithead, but Gem is good and kind and loyal. She’s spent years protecting me. While I was sneaking out at night to kiss boys who’d never understand my world and going to parties where I’d never belong, Gemma was covering for me and getting beaten up by our father.
How many bruises have I earned her? How many tears has she shed on my behalf?
I never even knew Papà was abusing her until a few weeks ago. He had hurt her for years, and I never noticed it. Honestly, what kind of a person does that make me? It’s like I had blinders on to everyone’s suffering but my own.
Hot shame prickles over my cheeks.
I have got to be better than this. I can’t keep failing my sister. That stops right now.
I walk over to where she’s sitting and kneel in front of her. “Is that what you want? Do you want to be with Ras?”
Her eyes swim with tears. “Yes. More than anything.”
Finally. There’s real conviction in her voice. This might be her chance to break free from Papà’s shackles and do what’s right for her. But she can’t start a new life with Papà and Rafaele on her back. As long as they need her for this marriage, they’ll never let her go.
A heavy weight settles in the pit of my stomach.
I can make them stop needing Gemma.
After all, she’s not the only Garzolo daughter around here.
Fucking fuck.
I brush my curls off my neck, feeling a nervous heat creep up my skin. Can I do this?
I have to do this.
Yes, it’s time to grow up. I’ve spent years dreaming of moving to LA, working as a music manager, rubbing shoulders with the talented and the famous, and having the freedom to do whatever the hell I wanted, but I’d never enjoy it if the price is Gem’s happiness. She deserves to live her life with someone who loves her the way Ras does.
She’s always had my back. Now, it’s my turn to have hers.
I wrap my palms over her knees and look into her eyes. “Are you willing to fight for it?”
Gemma sniffs and wipes her cheeks. “I’ll do whatever it takes.”
My chest tightens.
And so will I. For her, I’ll do anything. She deserves no less than that.
“Gem, I’ll take your place.”
Confusion flashes over her features. “What do you mean?”
I take a deep breath. “I’ll marry Rafaele.”
A day later, I’m sitting in an Italian restaurant in Chelsea owned by the Messeros.
This was supposed to be an intimate dinner with Rafaele’s immediate family and ours, so there are just seven other people scattered around the large dining table.
It’s quiet enough to hear a pin drop.
Rafaele’s mother and uncle have barely said a word since we sat down. So far, the conversation’s been dominated by Papà, but even he’s got his mouth shut now. A drop of sweat rolls down his pockmarked temple, and the sight of it fills me with satisfaction.
Nervous? You should be.
Gemma asked to speak with Rafaele alone just a few minutes ago, and now they’re talking in his office. Everyone can sense something is wrong. My sister’s supposed to be getting married in three days, but if their conversation goes well, it won’t be Gemma walking down the aisle.