Chapter Six
It was fear, he decided the next morning. He’d barely gotten an hour of sleep the night before and was seriously wondering if he was going to have to share the toilet with Abby. Thank God he’d told her not to cook breakfast. He didn’t think he’d be able to keep it down.
He sank onto the side of the bed and buried his face in his hands. Somehow, even with Abby here at the house, it hadn’t seemed real until now. But today his whole life would change. Today, he was marrying a woman he didn’t even know and ending all his hopes for marrying the one he’d been with forever.
Was it a mistake? Was he really ruining three lives instead of solving a problem? He didn’t know and now it was too late to back out. For better or worse, this was his wedding day. He’d promised Abby he’d take care of her and the baby. He had to keep that promise even if meant spending the rest of his life in a loveless half-marriage.
Tate took a deep breath to steady his nerves, then stood and walked to the dresser. A small velvet box lay on top and he picked it up and flipped it open. The large diamond engagement ring glittered at him mockingly.
Diane had picked it out herself and he was still making the payments on it. Lately it seemed like the ring had spent more time in its box than it had on her finger. Now, it would never be on her hand again.
He closed the lid gently and tucked it away in the top drawer of the dresser. Moving to the closet, he reached up to the shelf and took down another, larger, cardboard box. After a bit of searching, he found what he was looking for. This box was similar to the first one, but its blue velvet cover was older, faded with time. It resisted a little when he opened it, the hinges showing a trace of rust.
Compared to the sleek elegance of the ring he’d gotten for Diane, this set looked ancient. The diamond was small, surrounded by a white gold design that gave the illusion of more stones where there weren’t any. It had been worn by two generations of McCullom women, including his mother, and part of him had always thought his wife would be the third.
Diane hadn’t liked it. That’s why it had been stored in his closet. He’d had a vague hope that maybe someday Buddy would use it. Now, it would belong to Abby. He probably should have given her the engagement ring as soon as she’d agreed to marry him, but he hadn’t thought about it. Or maybe he hadn’t wanted to think about it.
Tate tried to force Diane out of his mind, but she wouldn’t go. Was she lying on some warm beach even now, wearing one of those skimpy bikinis she seemed to favor? How many times had he rubbed lotion onto that soft, tanned skin? And who was doing that for her now?
It would only take one phone call to find out if Clayton Caldwell was still in town, but he couldn’t make it. Didn’t even want to know. And from now on, it would be none of his business who she saw. The only thing he had to worry about was how to tell her about Abby. He had almost two weeks yet to decide how to handle it.
The sounds from the bathroom had stopped several minutes earlier and Tate glanced at the clock. It was almost time to leave. He pulled the engagement ring out, then dropped the box into the pocket of the suit jacket he’d taken out.
Buddy was waiting in the living room, his clothing more casual since he had to return to classes after the wedding.
“Thanks for feeding the stock this morning.”
His brother smiled. “Don’t worry about it. You had to get ready.” He looked Tate over. “Nice. Not everyday we get to see you dressed up.”
“Well, take a good look. It’ll be the last time for a while.” He ran a finger under his collar. “Feels like I’m choking to death.”
“You’ll live.”
They both turned as Abby’s footsteps sounded on the stairs. He only got a glimpse of long bare legs before Buddy breathed an awed “wow” from next to him. Tate knew exactly how he felt.
Abby was wearing a pale green dress that hit her just above the knees. The high waist emphasized her breasts. She’d left her hair loose and a ribbon the same shade as the dress circled her head, holding the dark locks away from her face. If she hadn’t been so pale, she would have looked beautiful. And apparently Buddy thought she did anyway.
“You look great!”
“Thank you.” A blush tinged her cheeks as she reached the bottom of the stairs.
“Did you remember your birth certificate?”
Abby handed him a piece of paper, folded twice, and Tate stuck it in his shirt pocket with his own. When she would have moved by him, he stopped her.
Lifting her hand, he slid the engagement ring onto her finger. It was a little loose but he didn’t think it would fall off. “I should have given you this before now.”
She stared at her hand for so long that Tate started to get worried. What if she hated it? “Is it okay?”
“It’s wonderful,” Abby said, her voice soft. “It’s the most beautiful ring I’ve ever seen.”
“It was our mother’s,” Buddy piped up. “And before that, it was our grandmother’s. It’s kind of turned into a tradition for it to go to the oldest son’s wife.”
Abby lifted her eyes to his, the question in them plain to see. “Are you sure you want to use it? If you’d rather keep it, I really don’t need a ring.”
“I’m sure.”
She searched his face an instant longer, then nodded. “I’ll be careful and take good care of it, I promise.”
She acted like he was just loaning it to her. Didn’t she realize it was hers now? He gave a mental shake of his head. “Ready?”
“Yes.”
Buddy held the door open. “I brought the truck around earlier.”
“Good.” He waited while Abby climbed in, then slid onto the seat next to her. Even as he started the motor, his brain was chanting a steady refrain. “Too late, too late.”
* * * * *
They reached Austin just in time to catch the tail end of the morning rush hour. The traffic slowed them enough that it was well after nine by the time they reached the court house. Luckily, they didn’t have to wait in line. Tate wasn’t sure his nerves could have stood it.
He watched as Abby signed the last of the papers, then pushed them back to the clerk. The woman folded them and placed them into a blue packet, handing them back with a smile.
“You’re all set. Congratulations and best wishes to both of you.”
“Thanks.” Tate took the papers. “You don’t happen to know where there’s a justice of the peace, do you?”
“Judge Wilson’s office is about two blocks down on the left. A red brick building. You can’t miss it.”
Tate nodded and took Abby’s arm. Buddy was still sitting in a chair against the wall and Tate motioned for him to follow them.
The walk to the judge’s office was as silent as the whole trip had been. Buddy had tried to carry on a conversation when they’d first left, but even he had quieted when it became obvious that neither Tate nor Abby were paying much attention to him.
The carpet in the judge’s outer office was thick and the air was heavy with a flowery scent that emanated from bowls on either end table. A neatly dressed secretary looked up from her desk as they stopped in front of her.
“May I help you?”
Tate gestured at Abby. “We want to get married. The clerk at the court house sent us here.”
She smiled up at him. “Do you have the papers with you?”
He handed them to her and she thumbed through them rapidly. “Everything seems to be in order. Why don’t you have a seat and I’ll let the judge know you’re here.”
She carried the papers into another room and in a second was back. “It will be about fifteen minutes. The judge is on the phone right now.”
Fifteen minutes wasn’t long, especially not when it meant the end of everything you’d dreamed of your whole life. He glanced at Abby. She was holding her purse in her lap, twisting the strap with both hands. It hit him all at once that he might not be the only one giving up his dreams. Abby was being forced into this just as much as he was. They were both victims of the circumstance that had occurred six and a half weeks earlier. Somehow, they’d have to learn to live with it and neither of them could do it alone.
In spite of his nerves, he reached for Abby’s hand, closing his own around it. Her fingers were cold as she clutched him, but the look she shot him was full of gratitude. Guilt shot through him. None of this was her fault. He had to try and remember that, had to remember to think about her needs for a change instead of his own.
The phone on the secretary’s desk buzzed and she picked it up. “Yes, sir?” There was a slight pause. “Right away.” She stood. “If you’ll follow me, the judge is ready for you now.”
Abby’s grip on his hand tightened to the point where he couldn’t have released her even if he’d tried. He leaned down and put his mouth next to her ear. “It’s going to be okay, Abby. I promised, remember?”
Slowly, she nodded and then stood, still holding on to his hand.
The judge’s office was a larger replica of the front room, with row after row of books lining the walls. He stood when they entered but stayed behind his desk, peering at the papers in his hand through the thick lenses of his glasses.
“Which of you two gentlemen is the groom?”
“I am.”
The judge looked up at Tate. “Good. Joyce, we’ll need you to stay and act as the second witness.” He pointed. “You can stand there, next to the bride. And you, young man,” he directed Buddy, “will stand next to the groom.”
As soon as everyone was arranged to his satisfaction, he turned to Tate and Abby. “Join hands, please.”
Tate faced Abby and took her other hand, trying to concentrate on her eyes instead of his shaking knees. The judge’s words became a blur in his mind until Buddy poked him. “I do,” he mumbled in automatic response. He heard the judge repeat the words, then Abby’s small “I do.”
“Is there a ring?”
Tate pulled the wedding band from his pocket and managed to get it on Abby’s finger without fumbling too badly.
“By the powers vested in me by the great state of Texas,” the judge intoned solemnly, “I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride.”
Oh, shit. Why hadn’t he realized sooner this was going to happen? Buddy, the secretary and the judge were all looking at him expectantly. He glanced down at Abby. Panic was written all over her face. Apparently she hadn’t realized it was going to happen either.
Tate took a deep breath. Okay, they could handle this. Just one little peck and everyone would be happy.
He wouldn’t have thought it possible, but Abby’s eyes widened even more as he leaned down. Just a fast brush, he promised.
Then his lips touched hers and he saw her eyes drift shut, tasted the sweetness and innocence that had been plaguing him for weeks. And his lips clung to the warmth, savored it against his will. When her lips parted, he deepened the kiss, unaware that his arms had gone around her to pull her tighter to him.
Someone cleared their throat and Tate jerked away from her, shock running through his system. What the hell was he doing? Abby looked as stunned as he felt, the paleness of her skin replaced by a high flush of color across her cheekbones.
He released her abruptly, using the excuse of paying the judge to give him time to get his tingling body back under control. It wasn’t nearly long enough. He was still blessing the length of his jacket when they reached the sidewalk out front, and praying it hid the bulge.
“Let’s find a restaurant.” Buddy was looking up and down the street. “I’m starved.”
Tate added Buddy’s stomach to his list of blessings. The cover of a table was just what he needed right now. That and a tub full of ice water.
* * * * *
It was true, Abby thought, looking yet again at the wedding rings on her finger as the truck pulled up next to the house. It was really true. They were married and her life was never going to be the same again.
She glanced up as the motor shut off, her gaze going straight to Tate’s mouth. She’d never been to a wedding before and, while she’d read about them, she certainly hadn’t been expecting a kiss like that one. Her lips were still tingling and she had the urge to rub them with her fingers to make them stop.
Oh, he’d kissed her that night. A lot. But somehow, it had been different then. She hadn’t even been sure she’d liked it. On the other hand, she’d liked that one this morning quite a bit. It wouldn’t even be so bad if it happened again.
Tate interrupted her thoughts. “I’m going to go put these papers up. I’ll be right back and we’ll take that walk down to the creek.”
“Shouldn’t I change first?”
His gaze swept over her. “No, you’ll be fine.” He paused with one foot on the bottom step. “I don’t think I told you earlier, but you look real pretty today.”
A tide of pleasure mingled with embarrassment rushed over her. “Thank you.”
Abby watched him vanish into the house and then looked down as Dog trotted up. “Did you hear that, Dog?” she whispered, scratching his ear. “He thinks I’m pretty. No one has ever thought I was pretty before.”
She shut up when Tate came back out. He’d removed his suit jacket and tie, and rolled the sleeves of his shirt up to his elbows.
“It’s this way.” He started off toward one of the pastures and Abby ran a few steps to catch up to him.
“Have you lived here on the ranch all your life?”
“Yeah. I was born here, in that room you’re staying in. So was my dad.” He slowed a little so she could keep up with him. “My grandfather built the original house. Dad added onto it after he and Mom got married.”
“It’s a beautiful house. You’re lucky, you know.” Abby pulled a stalk of grass and ran it through her fingers as they walked. Ahead she could see a line of cottonwoods rustling in the breeze.
“Why am I lucky?”
She shrugged. “To grow up in a house like that with a real family. It’s like you’ve put down roots here and every generation they grow a little deeper. You’ll always have this place, no matter what else happens to you.”
Tate held a tree limb out of the way so she could get by. The sound of gurgling water was louder now. A path wound through the grove of trees ahead and she followed it, coming out on a grassy bank beside the creek. The sunlight filtered through the leaves, giving the light a greenish cast. The water rippled over and around shiny stones, turning them dark and mysterious.
Abby paused to look around and felt Tate stop next to her. “I can see why you like to fish. It’s almost like being in a church. So quiet and peaceful.”
“It’s a good place to come when you need to think.” He lowered himself onto the grass and looked at her curiously. “You go to church?”
“No. Not really.” She sat down and curled her legs to one side. “When I was little, this church group would send out a bus during the summer for vacation bible school. They always picked me up. I think that was in Tennessee. All the places we lived sort of run together now.”
Tate stretched out on his back and laced his fingers behind his head. “Why did you move so much?”
“I’m not really sure.” Abby found a rock and tossed it at the creek, watching as the water shot into the air. “Mama was just restless, I guess. She didn’t like to stay in one place for too long.”
He turned his head slightly and studied her. “Is that why you didn’t graduate from high school?”
“No, there were always schools. Not long after we got here, Mama got sick. She just kept getting worse. The state paid for her medical bills, but when they were sure she was dying, they sent her home. There was a nurse that came by everyday to check on her and give her medicine, but she had to have someone with her all the time. The state wouldn’t pay for that, so I quit school and stayed with her myself.”
“It must have been hard.”
“Hard?” She stared at the water. “I don’t think I ever thought of it that way. It was just something that had to be done and there was no one else to do it but me.” Abby glanced at him. “You’re a lot older than Buddy aren’t you?”
“I was thirteen when he was born.”
“Why did your parents wait so long to have another child?”
“It wasn’t intentional. They both wanted more children, but it just never seemed to happen until Buddy. It was pretty late in life for both of them and I suspect he came as a real surprise. It was a good surprise, though. They were thrilled.”
He unlaced his hands and pushed up on one elbow. “How old are you?”
“Twenty-three.”
“You look younger.”
Abby nodded and looked down at her hands. “I know. That plus not having a diploma made it hard to get a job. Pete was the only one who’d hire me and he made me bring in my birth certificate first. He said he’d lose his liquor license if he couldn’t prove I was at least twenty-one.”
“That’s why you’re getting your G.E.D? So you could get a better job?”
“Sort of. I thought maybe one of the factories near Austin might hire me full-time. But they won’t if I don’t have a diploma.”
“A factory.” His voice sounded flat to her ears and resentment bubbled up in her.
“There’s nothing wrong with working in a factory. Lots of people do it.”
“They aren’t as little as you are. A factory would have killed you in a month.”
“No, it wouldn’t. I’m healthy and I’m a lot stronger than I look.”
“That reminds me.” Tate rolled to his feet. “We’d better get back to the house. You need to call and make an appointment with a doctor.”
Abby stood. “I don’t know any doctors.”
“There’s bound to be some in the phone book. Come on and let’s go see.”
He held out his hand again and this time Abby took it with no hesitation. She was actually getting used to his touch, she decided.