Deeply Destructive

“Sort of. Get out there and see who else wants to work with you. I bet anyone would love to have you at their gym.”

 

I sat back, thinking for the first time that maybe what had happened today wasn’t such a bad thing after all. It was true that I’d been loyal to Coach Jansen in the past, when other gyms with bigger teams had approached me. I’d always had this nagging doubt in the back of my mind, though, like maybe I was holding myself back when I should have been going for it. Was I scared to go to a competitive gym with a bunch of really successful pros, because then I wouldn’t be the big man on campus anymore?

 

“Sorry,” she said. “Did I just make no sense whatsoever?”

 

“No, you made way too much sense.”

 

The lights came up, and the curtain shut on the screen in front.

 

We looked at one another, both of us seeming to feel a little strange now that the lights were so bright. She still looked totally hot, though. Her hair was mostly over one shoulder and she was looking at me with a small half-smile. And those lips…I needed to stop focusing so much on how sexy she was and think about something else.

 

I took her hand again. “What about you?” I asked.

 

She looked at me. “What about me?”

 

“You know everything about what I’m trying to do. You know I want to fight for a living. What’s your story? What do you want to do with your life?”

 

She smiled and her cheeks flushed. “It’s embarrassing. I feel silly saying it like that.”

 

I pulled her hand closer to me and started rubbing her palm again. “Tell me. I want to know.”

 

“I guess I want to be a doctor. I want to practice medicine, probably become a neurosurgeon.”

 

“Like a brain surgeon?”

 

“Yeah. Is that super dorky?”

 

“Hell, no. It’s super impressive. I mean, that must mean you’re one of the smartest people in this whole damn city.”

 

“No, I don’t think so.”

 

“I bet you are. I figured as much.”

 

“It’s not like everything’s perfect for me,” she said. “In fact, just recently one of my teachers kicked me out of class and refused to let me turn in this paper I’d worked really hard on.”

 

“Maybe you just need to get out there and find another way, like you told me to do.” I raised an eyebrow at her and she gave me a little push.

 

“Don’t use my own words against me, Justin.”

 

I grabbed her wrist. “Careful, you know I’m a trained fighter.”

 

“You wouldn’t hurt a girl.”

 

“I never said I’d hurt you.” I put my hand on her leg, rubbing her skin. We sat like that for a while, with me rubbing her, moving further and further up her thigh. I slipped my finger under the bottom of her shorts, inching them up even further. I was so turned on, I thought I might go crazy. Lindsay was just watching me, her mouth slightly open, her face flushed.

 

I was about to lean in and put my tongue right into her mouth, feel her lips against me, dig my hands down her shorts and feel the soft skin of her hips, her ass, and then slowly reach beneath her panties…

 

Jesus. If I didn’t get out of here, I was going to do something I’d seriously regret.

 

“Shit, I should go,” I told her.

 

“What?” She sat up straight, looking confused and worried.

 

“I—I just realized that I need to go to this gym before it closes and talk to the trainer there. You were right, Lindsay. You were so right…I just…I have to go!” I got up and practically sprinted down the isle. Looking back at her, I yelled. “I’ll text you later, okay? Sorry!”

 

And then I just kept running.

 

 

 

 

 

LINDSAY

 

 

I was so turned on I literally had to take a deep breath and try to recuperate.

 

Justin’s hand had been on my thigh, on my bare skin, inching the bottom of my shorts up just a tiny bit so he could touch me – it had made me so hot I would have given myself to him in that moment, would have done anything he’d asked.

 

If he’d wanted to, I probably would have had sex with him right there in the empty movie theatre. My body felt like it was throbbing with desire.

 

Why the hell hadn’t he kissed me? We were holding hands, it was dark, we were alone…I could tell he wanted to. At least, I think he’d wanted to. Otherwise why would he have been touching me like that? I closed my eyes and wished he was with me again.

 

Every time he left me, it felt like part of me was being ripped away. He was consuming me, and I didn’t care.

 

The thought of what might happen if he ever did kiss me was terrifying. If I was this wrapped up in him now, what would happen when his lips touched mine? Or if we went even further?

 

I shivered.

 

I sat there for a few more moments, forcing myself to take deep breaths until I calmed down. I was so charged up I didn’t trust myself to even stand.

 

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