I didn’t want to continue to let her beat herself up. I was an adult when I took my first snort, and I was eight years past that now. It wasn’t her responsibility to manage my demons for me. In the end, it had always been my decision and the euphoria over the pain had seemed worth the risk to me for so many years. Now I had Lia, who had battled and survived her life without the crutch I had needed. I would never let her use something that could potentially take her away from me, even as a form of escape, and I owed her the same. The high was no longer worth the guilt and self-loathing that came with it. “Fae, you couldn’t have stopped me. I needed it to survive for a long time, and as much as I hate to say it, I would have cut you from my life before giving it up.”
She absorbs my brutal honesty with little emotion. If I see anything, it’s a small measure of relief at my words. It would be too hard for her to accept she could have done something to help me sooner and did not. How is it that nothing rattles the woman in front of me? I so appreciate her strength, her fortitude, and unconditional support. “Does Lia know? Is that why she left?”
“She does, and no, that isn’t the reason.” The same quandary faces me that I had with Rose. With my aunt though, I feel she needs to know about Lia’s parentage and my part in keeping it from her. It seems impossible to fully convey the mess I’ve made of my relationship with Lia without being forthcoming. Rubbing a hand across my throbbing temple, I begin. “I discovered—quite by accident—the identity of Lia’s father right before her attack. When he approached me after Lia left the hospital, I made the choice not to tell her. She wasn’t in a good place emotionally and I didn’t think she could deal with any additional stress. Especially something of that magnitude.”
“I assume that he lives here if you have met with him?”
Inclining my head, I say, “He does. Her father is Lee Jacks.”
My aunt gasps, clearly stunned by my revelation. I had no doubt she would recognize the name. He is on the board of directors of the hospital she works at. “Oh my—wow,” she finally says when she has collected herself. “Did he know about Lia?” I can see the anger gathering in her eyes as she imagines someone of his stature leaving his daughter to endure all that Lia has.
“No, he says that he didn’t and I believe him. He had a brief relationship with her mother before leaving the states for a while. Apparently, they never reconnected at any point and he had no reason to believe he might have fathered a child.”
Almost idly, my aunt says, “Lee…Lia.”
Grimacing, I say, “Apparently her mother had a nasty sense of humor. I think it was her way of having the last laugh on Lee.”
“Is he the reason she suddenly developed a conscience and turned herself into the police?”
“He is, although I don’t know how he convinced her to do it.” Actually, I have good idea, but my aunt probably doesn’t need to know. Whatever his methods, he achieved a semblance of justice for Lia and I can’t bring myself to care about how he went about it.
“And her stepfather?” I know what she’s asking. Of course, there is no way she’s lived in North Carolina her whole life and never heard the rumors about Lee. If any of them were to be believed, then killing a man, especially one who hurt his daughter, would all be in a normal day for him. Did he do it? Do I care? Hell—fucking no, I don’t. The bastard is burning in hell now and I could give a shit as to what put him there. If Lee avenged his daughter by killing Jim Dawson, then he’s officially my new best friend.
“I know nothing about that,” I say truthfully. Lee is certainly not about to bring me into his confidence—nor do I want him to. All parties involved, including the police, were more than happy to close that particular case with little fanfare.
“How did Lia find out if you didn’t tell her?” my aunt asks, still looking slightly shell-shocked.
“Fate is a complete bitch. Lia went to school to take care of her registration for the coming semester. Lee had already paid her tuition and she found out. She went to his office thinking it was a mistake. Lee thought she was there because I had finally told her about him. He had already said too much before he figured out she had no idea who he was. So, he told her the rest. She left his office very upset. He called me in a panic to let me know. When I got home, she was packing.” Slumping back into my seat as my gut once again churns, I run an unsteady hand through my hair as I admit, “She told me she could no longer handle the secrets between us. She wants to know everything that happened with Cassie.”
Fae tenses at the mention of Cassie. She has been a taboo subject between us for eight years. I’ve never told anyone the full story of what happened the night she tried to kill me. No one had a clue how volatile our relationship had turned in the month leading up to that night. Cassie had been an Oscar-caliber actress to the outside world, but behind closed doors, she’d given free rein to her manic tendencies and I had been her target—her sick obsession. “I’ve tried to never push you about Cassie and I won’t now. I will say though, if you want a future with Lia, you have to tell her. You can’t move forward with her or recover from your addiction without sharing that load. You turned to cocaine as a coping mechanism. It will continue to be that for you until you deal with what pushed you in its direction to start with. That is the first step you must take. We can work on the rest after that.”