My father and I sat on a bench in the garden area outside the hospital. As the August heat exploded like steam off the cement, I braced for the same old speech.
Over the last week, I received different versions of the same lecture. I wanted to crawl under the bench to avoid it again. He used the same sad tactic every time with pathetic, glossy eyes. Alex, you need to be spending the last few days with your mother instead of running up and down the halls destroying things. His words made me feel horrible. I felt sad for him. I felt sad for my mother. I felt sad for the little girl who used to be me.
Mrs. Mason continued to bring food, but I never saw her or Jess. She left the food at the nurse’s station. Dr. Mason stopped by each day and talked to my father about my mother’s impending death. I wanted to ask about Jess, but I was afraid it would remind him of the incident with the water guns. The problems my father wanted to rehash.
“Dad, you know I am really, really, really sorry.”
“I know. But that’s not what I want to talk to you about. Staying in the hospital has become a problem.”
“Like, what kind of problem?”
“We can’t stay here anymore, Pumpkin.”
I bit down on my lip to stop the sudden gasp. The doors slid open and my stomach fell to the bottom of an elevator shaft. Our car no longer was an option and now the hospital kicked us out too.
“I…I don’t understand. Where are we going to live?”
He smiled, “Sprayberry.”
The next day, we drove down a dirt road with the old Bronco packed full. This Sprayberry place was out in the middle of nowheres-ville. My only experience with a ranch came from Jess's constant ramblings. I missed his stories. I missed his smiling face. But even if I was tortured, I would never tell Jess how much I missed him the past week.
Sprayberry Ranch had a small, vacant farmhouse on the north end of the property. The Masons said we could stay for free if my father would do the repair work. When things got better, we could pay rent. The Masons didn’t want us to worry about any of that for now. I wanted scream, but I knew we had nowhere else to go.
“Pretty cool, isn’t it?” My father asked as we pulled up the driveway to the little farmhouse. The sun sparkled across the tall grass and I spotted a few red cows in the distance. I imagined the worst, but to my surprise, it was decent. I don’t know why I expected anything less from the Masons.
Our new home was a simple, one-story house, covered with faded gray siding, blue shutters, and a wooden porch. My father took a quick look around the outside of the old place. He smiled at my frowning face.
“Well, not too bad. A few rotten boards will need to be replaced along the sides around the roof, but it shouldn’t leak. Just needs a good cleaning and painting as far as I can tell. Come on,” he put his arm across my back, “let’s see the inside. I think you will like it.”
We walked through the small living room with hardwood floors, shiny from a recent coat of lacquer. Old, pink paper covered the kitchen walls. I slid my hand across the counter top with mud-colored stains bigger than my palm. Wandering down the short hallway, I found two bedrooms and a bathroom.
“The one on the right is yours,” my father called from the living room. He found his old cheery attitude again the moment we turned into the driveway.
The room caught me by surprise. Driving out to the ranch, I didn’t think about furniture. The bedroom had a large, white bed with a matching dresser and mirror. It wasn’t elaborate, but I could tell it was meant for a girl. It was meant for me.
A fluffy, purple bedspread covered the mattress. I didn’t see a price tag, but it smelled brand new. Absently, I pulled open one of the drawers and found a few clothing items. I saw my father watching from the doorway.
“Mrs. Mason asked if you had any new school clothes. I told her we hadn’t gone shopping yet. She asked for your sizes. Said she could get some for you since we wouldn’t have time to shop before school starts next week.”
Yeah right! I yelled in my head. It’s more like we didn’t have the money. It was just another item to add to the growing list of debts we owed these Masons.
I said nothing and pushed open the closet to find it held more clothes placed neatly on hangers. As my fingers thumbed through new jeans and shorts, I studied the choice of outfits picked by Mrs. Mason. She purchased a few plain shirts resembling those I’d worn around the hospital. However, most of the items had sparkles, flowers, or were stamped with a fancy logo.
In the back, I found two nice dresses, suitable for Easter or maybe Christmas. I frowned, letting my fingers touch the fabric. This Alex didn’t wear such clothes. On the floor, my eyes scanned two new pairs of canvas tennis shoes, a pair of sandals, and a pair of shiny leather dress flats. I now had fancy shoes to go with the fancy dresses to wear to nonexistent fancy parties.
I let out a deep breath through my lips. It was all very frustrating. Sitting down on the floor, I slipped off my tight, ragged gray shoes. I stuck my foot into a pair of the new canvas ones. My toes wiggled at the tip with plenty of room to spare. My feet let out a sigh of relief and sucked in a big gulp of freedom. If only my heart could feel the same way.
Outside I heard a rumbling noise in the yard. I laced the other shoe and stood up beside the bedroom window, seeing Jess on his four-wheeler. My chest jumped as I watched him. It took everything in me not to go running down the hall and out the front door. Instead, I walked slowly to the front porch, trying to play it cool. I stood by my father and waited for Jess to talk first.
“Hey, Alex.”
“Hi,” I said, feeling my lips smile.
Jess didn’t look any different than when I saw him at the hospital. He wore the same old, roughed up jeans and t-shirt with the exception of the boots. Today’s pair was old and caked with mud.
“Hey, Mr. Tanner. Y'all moved in?”
“We’re getting there,” my father said back. “You want to come in?”
“Well, ummm. I was wonderin’ if I could give Alex a tour. Show her all the good spots.” He flashed one of his big grins that made you doubt he could ever cause any problems. My father looked at me and back at Jess.
“I guess so but you two need to try a little bit harder not to get in trouble.” He gave us both the typical stern parent look.
“I promise, Dad.” I squeezed a quick hug around his waist and walked over to the four-wheeler.
“I like your shoes.”
“Um, thanks.” I felt the heat burning on my cheeks. My brand new, gray canvas shoes felt like blood money.
“You gettin’ on or what?”
“Sure,” I muttered, glancing at the seat then back at Jess. “How do you do this?”
“Here, let me help ya.” Jess pulled me on the extra space toward the back. “Your arms go here.” He put my hands on his waist in a tight grip. “Now just hang on!”
Jess tapped the gas, and we started out at a slow speed toward the ranch. The wheels hit a few holes, and I bounced up from the seat. As we reached the clearing away from my father’s view, Jess punched the gas and the vehicle lurched forward. I screamed, but my voice disappeared in the fast wind whipping across my face. The grass and trees flew by in a blur.
He would kill me! My first day at the ranch and Jess would kill me out in the meadow with his stupid four-wheeler. I yelled at him to stop but I couldn’t even hear my own words. My fingers dug into the fabric of his shirt for a tighter grip.
We zipped around the ranch for what seemed like an eternity. In the distance, a large building came into focus. Jess slowed down at the driveway entrance. My eyes grew large at what had to be the Masons’ house.