After hearing Hou Xiaomei’s frustrations, Li Qinghou thought the matter over, then sighed. He made some inquiries, and soon learned that Bai Xiaochun had ended up together with Song Junwan and Zhou Zimo by means of his Aphrodisiac Pills.
One particular day after Bai Xiaochun had just gone to spend some time with Song Junwan and Zhou Zimo, he returned to his grand hall, and had just sat down when Li Qinghou entered.
“Uncle Li!” he said, instantly rising to his feet and rushing over to him. It didn’t matter that he was the Arch-Emperor now, to him, Li Qinghou would always be like a father.
Li Qinghou was very pleased with how things had turned out for Bai Xiaochun. He would often think back to that boy he had seen on top of Mount Hood, lighting an incense stick. Step by step, he had reached this point, and Li Qinghou couldn’t have been prouder.
The two of them sat down to reminisce, with Li Qinghou giving occasional bits of advice. It didn’t matter what he said, Bai Xiaochun would always nod in agreement. After the time it takes an incense stick to burn, Li Qinghou cleared his throat.
“Say, Xiaochun… do you have any more Aphrodisiac Pills?”
“Huh?” Bai Xiaochun blurted. He had assumed that his Uncle Li had come here for some specific reason, and here it was. After blinking a few times, Bai Xiaochun slapped his thigh.
“You’ve taken a liking to someone, haven’t you, Uncle Li? Who is it?” He was actually very curious about this point. Of course, Li Qinghou had always been fond of Big Fatty Zhang’s Master, Xu Meixiang. Unfortunately, she had gone missing, and even after most of the people of the Heavenspan Realm were now gathering back together, she was nowhere to be found. [1]
Glaring in embarrassment, Li Qinghou said, “There’s no reason to flip out! If you have any, I’ll just take one!”
“If anybody else had asked me for one, Uncle Li, I would say I'm out. But since it's you, here you go!” Bai Xiaochun couldn’t help but smile at how Li Qinghou seemed to be having a youthful reinvigoration. The truth was that he didn’t have many Aphrodisiac Pills left. Furthermore, after what had happened with Song Junwan and Zhou Zimo, he was very cautious when it came to Aphrodisiac Pills. Taking out a bottle, he offered it to Li Qinghou.
Chuckling knowingly, Bai Xiaochun looked at Li Qinghou and said, “Uncle Li, you’re getting old, and you need to look out for your health. These things… well, don’t overdose, okay? That bottle has eight pills and--”
“Cut the crap!” Li Qinghou said coldly, grabbing the pill bottle.
“I get it, I get it. You’re a bit shy, so you need some really strong stuff. Hahaha! I understand.” Bai Xiaochun was truly amused by the whole situation, and couldn’t hold back from laughing.
“Although, if you’ve taken a liking to someone, Uncle Li, you really don’t need to use something like that medicine…. You just need to figure out how to woo her! Let me teach you.” Thumping himself on the chest, he said, “Trust me, I'm not bragging when I say that I--”
At this point, Li Qinghou couldn’t take it anymore. Glaring at Bai Xiaochun, he turned and left.
Chuckling, Bai Xiaochun called out, “Don’t forget, Uncle Li, don’t actually consume that pill. Just a bit of powder from it will do fine. Don’t overdose!”
Before walking out the door, Li Qinghou paused, looked over his shoulder, and looked meaningfully at Bai Xiaochun. Then he nodded.
“Just some powder!” Bai Xiaochun repeated. “Understand!?”
At that point, he suddenly felt like there was something odd about the whole situation. There had been something in Li Qinghou’s eyes right before he left that seemed to indicate that there was more to the story….
However, he couldn’t think of what that might possibly be. “Uncle Li is a great guy, just a bit shy, that's all.”
Thinking about what it would be like when Li Qinghou used the Aphrodisiac Pill, Bai Xiaochun began to hum a little tune and head back to his throne.
That evening….
Hou Xiaomei walked briskly through the imperial palace, trying to keep her breathing steady. She had two Aphrodisiac Pills, one in each hand, and she was continuously reminding herself of what Li Qinghou had told her.
“I have to crush them. I have to crush them….”
Eventually, she reached Bai Xiaochun’s private chamber. Taking a moment to compose herself, she looked up, a smile on her face that made her look as beautiful as a freshly bloomed flower.
“Are you here, Big Bro Xiaochun?”
Bai Xiaochun was in the middle of meditating. When he heard Hou Xiaomei’s voice, he quickly opened the door of the chamber and saw her standing there, bathed in moonlight.
He was surprised to see her. After all, this was the first time she had come to visit him after returning.
“Xiaomei, you--” Before he could even finish his sentence, she blinked a few times and then walked into the private chamber. As she did, she squeezed her fists!
Two popping sounds then rang out within the chamber.
“What was that sound? Seemed really familiar….” It was at that point that a pink mist began to spread out….
“That… that was… an Aphrodisiac Pill?!?!” His eyes went wide, and he backed up. But that was when a soft, warm body wrapped around him.
“How did you get an Aphrodisiac Pill?!?!” Even as his vision turned pink, he heard Hou Xiaomei’s captivating voice whispering in his ear.
“Uncle Li gave it to me.” At that point, Bai Xiaochun fell down onto his back, and the entire room filled with pink mist.
1. Right in the middle of this paragraph is a completely random sentence that explains that Big Fatty Zhang went into secluded cultivation to advance his cultivation base, which he thinks is too low. Honestly, that passage completely breaks the flow of this particular scene, so I'm just including the information here as a footnote
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Chapter
1215: Aggrieved Master God-Diviner
Zhou Zimo had crushed an Aphrodisiac Pill, as had Song Junwan. But Hou Xiaomei had crushed two. And she had done so in the confines of a private chamber….
It was easy to imagine the result…. The pink mist was particularly dense, and wouldn’t dissipate. Bai Xiaochun and Hou Xiaomei breathed it in… for days. When it finally faded away, the door to the private chamber opened, and Hou Xiaomei emerged. She looked a bit limp, but her face was flushed, and her eyes were sparkling. After glancing over her shoulder, she patted her tummy and then giddily left.
A few minutes later, Bai Xiaochun staggered out of the private chamber, then stood there looking disconsolately up at the sky.
“I’m the grand and mighty Arch-Emperor, one of the three most powerful experts in the Eternal Immortal Domains….” He could only sigh at how his defeat at the hands of Aphrodisiac Pills seemed to have become a recurring theme in his life.
“If only Aphrodisiac Pills didn’t exist….” he moaned inwardly. A moment passed, and he realized that he shouldn’t think that way. Without Aphrodisiac Pills, he would probably be alone in life. After all… he was simply too pure and honest of a person.
“Ah, whatever. If they exist, they exist.” Shaking his head, he sighed. By now, he felt that he understood Hou Xiaomei’s way of thinking. She had been the first to get to know him, but Song Junwan and Zhou Zimo were already pregnant with his children. Unwilling to be left behind, Hou Xiaomei had resorted to extreme methods to even things out.
“Ai. It’s not their fault that they’re all fighting amongst each other to have my children. It’s my fault really.” Shaking his head, he took a short walk before returning to his private chamber.