I narrowed my eyes at him. “What do you mean? Of course it is.”
“And yet you keep putting yourself in these positions.”
“What positions?”
He folded his hands on the table. “My brother told me what you and your sister were saying, that it was possession. Demonic possession. You know Daniel discounted that off the bat, because of his beliefs. But you know my beliefs. You knew what I felt about that lighthouse. I have no doubt that if you keep opening yourself up to this…this job of yours, that you’re just putting yourself more at risk.”
I couldn’t believe my ears. “You believe that I was possessed?” I asked quietly. I wasn’t sure that I could trust Uncle Al with the truth. We all played it off like I was delirious with a fever, all so my parents wouldn’t fear I was following in Pippa’s footsteps and have me committed. What if Uncle Al was baiting me? What if he’d tell my parents what I really thought, what I knew, happened?
I cleared my throat and continued before he could answer. “Well I wasn’t possessed. I was just delirious. My parents made a bigger deal about all of it than they should have. And I didn’t want to live in that. Living with Dex made perfect sense and I don’t regret a minute of it. I just wish they could see that I know what I’m doing.”
He stared at me for a few moments before shrugging, as if all the world had been on his shoulders. I knew he didn’t believe the act but I was giving him no choice. “When you see them, you can tell them that yourself.”
I took another sip of my tea, the liquid burning my tongue and doing the opposite of making me sleepy. When my mouth recovered, I asked him, “What did you want to talk to me about?”
“I think we’ve already covered part of it,” he said. His eyes drifted over my shoulder to the empty hallway. “Perry, I’m your uncle. I’m not your father. I know that doesn’t stop me from giving you advice though so I’m just going to talk. You can listen or you won’t listen, it’s all the same. I want you to be happy. But I also want you to stay happy. To think about your future.”
“Okay,” I drew out, thinking he sounded like he was going into a pitch for a high-interest savings account.
He sighed and reached for a cookie, weighing it in his hands. “I just don’t want you to do anything foolish.”
I raised my brows. “That’s kind of vague.”
“Dex is foolish,” he said quickly, his words sharp like needles. “You may think you’re in love with him, and I believe you are, and I also believe the man is in love with you, but…come on, bella, you have to step back from the situation for just one second and try and see it all from someone else’s perspective.”
I swallowed hard, a ball of fire expanding painfully in my chest. “Someone else like my parents?”
“They’re older, they’ve been there, we’ve all been there. You’re living with this man that you barely even know, a man who just broke your heart and ruined you.”
“Barely even know?” I managed to say. “I know Dex, okay? I know him more than anyone in this world.”
“Perry,” he said, his voice tinged with impatience. “When was the last time you were here? Think about it.”
I blinked stupidly. “Uh, September?”
“Right. September. You came here with Dex in September. What month is it now?”
“May,” I said, my throat tightening.
“And how many months is that?”
I stared at him, unwilling to count. “I don’t know.”
“It’s eight months. You’ve known this guy for eight months.”
Holy fucking shit. Was that true? I’d only met Dex eight months ago? It felt like I’d known him for years, ages, eternity. After everything we’d been through…every episode, every experience, it fused our souls together, time be damned.
“It feels longer than that,” I said feebly. But I wouldn’t let him, my parents, win this argument. I straightened up in my seat and looked my uncle in the eye. “But so what? Lots of couples move in together when the moment is right. It’s different for every relationship. It doesn’t have to be a big deal.”
“It will turn into a big deal when you commit to someone you realize you don’t know at all. I’m divorced for a reason. Don’t think I didn’t think like you at one point.”
I gave him a funny look. “I live with Dex, Uncle Al. That’s it. We’re not getting married. We’ve barely discussed the future at all. Calm down.”
His eyes widened for a split second. “He’s thirty-two. You’re twenty-three.”
“Age doesn’t matter.”
“It does sometimes. It does when you assume that just because you’re not thinking of the future doesn’t mean he isn’t.”
I nearly laughed. Uncle Al clearly didn’t know Dex at all. “He just got out of a long-term relationship. He’s not thinking about that shit.”
“And are you?”
I stared at the wisps of steam coming off the mug of tea. Christ, I didn’t know what I was thinking half the time. I wasn’t about to tell him about my white picket fence idea, the conversation we had about doing something after EIT, about houses in Seaside, Boston, or wherever I said. I wasn’t going to tell him about the maternal instinct that started kicking about when I saw him being a fur baby daddy to Fat Rabbit.
“I…”I started. “I’m just playing it by ear.”
He shook his head slightly. “You’re in love, Perry. You’re head over heels. You’re playing it by heart, not ear. Like you always do.”
“Well what the hell do you want me to say? If I say I think about a future with him, you’ll get mad, and if I say I don’t, you’ll call me a liar.”
His eyes softened and reached out for my hand across the table. “Bella, please. I’m not mad. I just want to pull you out of it for just a moment, just so you can look at it from a different angle. There are so many things in life that make us happy in the short term. These cookies, for example,” he said, picking up the tray. “But in the long term, they can hurt you.”
“Maybe I’m tired of everyone always worrying about me getting hurt,” I said snidely, crossing my arms.
“Maybe we’re worried because you are always getting hurt,” he said, “and a person can only get hurt so many times before it really starts to ruin them.”
“Alberto, are you coming to bed?” Marda asked, appearing at the doorway in a silk night robe, a sleep mask smeared on her face.
“Just a minute, darling,” he said, flashing her his smile.
“No more cookies,” she said, wagging her finger at him. “You have to watch your heart.”
When she left, he looked at me and sighed. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I’m just looking out for you as I always do. Wasn’t I right about Seattle? About you going to stay with him and his girlfriend?”
I mumbled that he was. “But it doesn’t mean you’re right about this. I love Dex. I know him inside and out.”
“You know him as much as you can know someone for eight months,” he said. “Just don’t forget that. And don’t forget that most of that time, he was with someone else.” He eased himself out of the chair, leaving me with that extremely sobering thought.
He kissed me on the head goodnight and then shuffled off toward his room. I sat there at the table, drinking my hot tea until it was gone, apprehensive now about going to see Dex. I hated that my uncle—and by extension, my parents—were able to instill this doubt in me.
Had I really only known Dex, my Dex, my Declan Foray, for less than a year? The last two months of us living together, that was the only time we were actually together as a couple. Plus we started up hot on the heels of his last relationship, one that lasted three fucking years. No wonder my parents were so against the whole thing. No wonder my uncle was. Aside from the people who knew us best like Rebecca, Dean, and Ada, our relationship must look batshit crazy to the rest of the world.
Then again, what else was new?
I took in a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves, then placed the cup of tea in the sink. I wondered if Rebecca was up and ready for a chat, but the lights in the living room were out. I reluctantly made my way to the bathroom and then finally the guest bedroom.
I carefully slipped into bed, not knowing if Dex was asleep. I wanted to talk to him—I wanted to know what he talked to Uncle Al about and if it was anywhere near as brutal as it was for me. But I heard him snoring lightly, brought on by all the beers, and decided to leave it for another day. I turned my back to him, our asses touching each other but our upper bodies far apart.