Through a Dark Glass

A nearly overwhelming flash of hatred hit me like a wall. I fought to keep my expression still. She hated me with a passion. Her life had been easy before my arrival, and she saw me as an overbearing taskmaster who had changed her life for the worse. Then I saw an image, a plan of her leading me alone to check the fish. They would be the same fresh salmon I’d already checked.

But days ago, she’d charmed the son of a fish monger into selling her four salmon—for a low price—that she’d let spoil in the sun. I saw an image in her mind of her preparing and sending out the spoiled salmon for tonight’s dinner, and then in the aftermath, claiming she had warned me in front of all the kitchen staff, and that she’d shown me the spoiled fish, and I had insisted she serve it anyway.

She was going to ruin Jarrod’s dinner party and blame me.

I pulled from her thoughts and stared at her for a moment. She began to fidget.

Looking to Ester, I said, “If I send you Matilda to help chop vegetables, can you manage the dinner with the girls you have here, but without Lavonia?”

A flash of something nearly unreadable, possibly hope, crossed Ester’s eyes. “Yes, my lady. I can manage.”

I turned back to Lavonia. “You are dismissed. I’ll make sure you have a month’s wages, but if you are not gone from this house within an hour, I will have a guard escort you out the gates.”

Her mouth fell open, and her features twisted. “You can’t do that! I’ll tell Lord Jarrod!”

I briefly wondered if the girl was sharing Jarrod’s bed on occasion, but it hardly mattered. “And what if I show him the spoiled fish you’ve hidden behind the hen house?” I countered, “And of your plan to ruin his dinner for Lord Allemond?”

Ester’s face registered stark surprise but not disbelief.

Cora’s shone with guilt. She knew.

Lavonia went speechless.

“You have an hour,” I told her. “I’ll make sure you receive your wages.”

Going pale, Lavonia fled the kitchen, and my gaze drifted to Cora. “Do you wish to go with her?”

She drew in a sharp breath. “No, my lady.”

I looked about the room. “Ester is in charge here, and you will all address her as Miss Ester from now on. Anyone who cannot follow her instructions without complaint will follow the path of Lavonia.”

I nodded once to Ester and left the kitchen.

Even though I’d not probed Lavonia’s thoughts very deeply, I felt drained, knowing I should never put myself in a position to attempt two readings in a day. My head hurt. So did my wrist.



That night, I sat at the dressing table in my room as Miriam curled my hair with her small heated iron. Instead of piling it up tonight, she let it hang loose but drew several strands in the front over my forehead and pinned them with a small jeweled clip. Finally she put touches of kohl at the corners of my eyes and beet juice on my lips.

I stood.

She’d finished my new gown that morning, and looking at myself in the mirror, I could hardly believe the results. The gown was of burgundy silk with a v-neckline. Tight at the waist, it swept down into a voluminous skirt that moved gracefully when I walked. Thankfully, it was long sleeved and covered my now black and purple wrist. I wore a ruby pendant with matching earrings—that had once belonged to Helena.

“I don’t look anything like myself anymore,” I commented.

“You look beautiful,” Miriam answered simply. “You should go down.”

“Thank, you, Miriam,” I said. “For the dress.”

She smiled tiredly. I knew she’d probably been up half the night.

Leaving my room, I headed downstairs and heard voices in the hall. My mother always allowed the guests to arrive before making an entrance, so I had decided to follow her example.

Stopping at the entrance to the hall, I looked in to take of stock of what awaited me. All four Volodanes were there, wearing the new clothing Betty and I had made for them—with some input from Sebastian.

I thought Kai looked especially fine in a sleeveless black tunic. It suited his tall form, and his long hair hung down past his shoulders.

Sebastian wore a high-collared jacket over a white shirt, and he cut a dashing figure. My husband and Jarrod both wore new tunics with long sleeves, and they looked well too.

The hall was clean and properly arranged. There were white cloths on the table along with porcelain plates, silver cutlery, and pewter goblets. I’d made centerpieces from wild growing roses and lilacs. For tonight, I’d had the cheerful spaniels housed in the barracks with several of the guards who’d promised to look after them.

My gaze drifted to the guests: Lord Allemond, his wife, Rosamund, and his brother, Phillipe. Several of the Volodane guards stood discreetly near the walls, along with several of the Monvílles’. This was customary.

Lord Allemond glanced at the table several times with what I could only describe as consternation. He was a striking man, in his late forties with an impressive head of waving silver hair. Lady Rosamund had once been considered lovely, but now her generous curves were thickening and her face was heavily lined. She wore diamonds and a velvet gown of dark green.

With a deep breath, I stepped forward and entered the hall.

Allemond was the first one to see me, followed shortly by everyone else, but I couldn’t help a stab of satisfaction at the flicker of uncertainty that passed over his face. “Megan?”

He recovered quickly.

I smiled and held out one hand—as my mother would have done. “My lord. It’s been too long.”

Jarrod stared at me as well. He’d never seen me with my hair down loose or wearing a v-neck dress.

Lady Rosamund must have been equally surprised by the sight of me, but she was a creature of my mother’s ilk and showed nothing besides false pleasure. “Megan,” she said, kissing my cheek. “We were saddened to hear of your sister’s passing and surprised to hear of your marriage.”

Her words were intended as sharp barbs, to point out that I was a secondary replacement in an unfortunate match, and even so, only here by virtue of my sister’s death. I smiled and kissed her in return. “Thank you for your kind thoughts. It’s so good to have guests in the hall.”

Phillipe, who was younger than his brother, leaned over and kissed my hand. “My dear,” he said, although in my entire life, he’d never taken notice of me before.

At the sight of this, Rolf’s face darkened, which surprised me. I’d hardly thought him capable of feeling jealousy. Perhaps it was merely ownership.

“Shall we all sit and enjoy some wine before dinner?” I asked.

This was the signal for everyone to be seated. Wine was always served before dinner at these gatherings. Jarrod said nothing and took his cues from me. He sat at the head of the table, and I made suggestions for everyone else.

Smiling at Lady Rosamund, I said, “I fear we are outnumbered by the men.”

At this, even her expression flickered with uncertainty. She’d sat across from me at a table many times, and she’d certainly never heard me attempt a playful comment. Until that moment, I’d not realized how much I had changed. Though it was not a change I’d wanted or asked for, I had been greatly altered by the expectations of Jarrod and even quiet Rolf. He never made requests, but I knew he wanted me to please his father.

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