“We all have our strengths and weaknesses,” he said with a soft chuckle.
“Thanks for stopping by, Paul. I really appreciate it, but I need to get Lily inside and fix her some lunch.”
“That’s fine,” he said. “Just wanted to come by and see how you were doing.”
“I appreciate it. Really. And stop by anytime. Lily loves seeing you.”
“I’m gonna go give her one last hug, and I’ll be out of your way.”
I watched him pick Lily up in his arms and throw her into the air. She giggled, gave him a great big hug, and then hopped back onto her bike as she left. I watched Paul’s car ride down the road as my neighbor’s door opened again, and the sound caught Lily’s attention, distracting her enough that she went crashing into the curb and tumbled onto the pavement.
“Lily!”
I made a mad dash from the porch and tore across the grass. She was crying and sniffling and holding her knee. I scooped her up into my arms as something warm dropped next to me, and I looked over and found my neighbor reaching out for my daughter.
“I have medical training. May I see it, sweet girl?”
The way he cooed at my daughter caught my attention. Tears were leaking from Lily’s eyes as his calloused hands picked up her leg. I held her hand as my eyes danced around her scraped and bloodied knee. He knocked some of the dirt and rocks off her scraped-up skin, his movements intentional and filled with purpose.
“Let me see if you can move it, okay?” he asked.
He slowly moved Lily’s leg, and she whimpered. She was gripping tightly onto my shirt as she sniffled hard. His hand was moving around her kneecap, trying to feel for something as blood continued to rise to the surface.
“It doesn’t seem dislocated or anything, but you need to get it cleaned up before it gets infected.”
His voice was deep. Full. He seemed like the kind of man who could whisper, and a room full of people could still hear him. He looked into my eyes before he slowly placed Lily’s leg back to the ground. Then, he got up and walked back to his house.
“Thank you,” I said.
He stopped and turned his head, and I watched as he nodded slightly.
I knew my gut about him had been right. I knew he wasn’t a cold-hearted man. I scooped Lily up in my arms and carried her back into the house, figuring a bath was probably the best course of action to get her cleaned up.
But I had a hard time looking away from my neighbor as he made his way back to his house.
If he wasn’t so distant, I’d consider him attractive.
CHAPTER 6
GRAHAM
I felt bewitched.
Was there such a thing?
Every time I looked out my fucking window and saw her house, she popped into my mind. Her emerald eyes and her distinct little smile. That woman was a looker, but she was also curious.
It was unsettling, finding another woman attractive. In all the cities I’d bounced around to and all the women who had tried to talk me up, none of them had ever been my type. Their eyes either reminded me of my wife’s or were nothing like my wife’s. Their bodies were either enticing like my wife’s or the exact opposite of my wife’s. Either way, my dear late wife was always on my mind. Her warmth and her laughter. Her inviting curves and her generosity.
Then, I’d see her body as I’d last seen it, and I would be pulled back into that pain.
But there was none of that looking at my neighbor, no comparison to Cary and no reminiscence of that time in my life. It was odd, experiencing that without my memories impeding on the moment.
I couldn’t let it sway me, though. I couldn’t let her get under my skin.
No one could get close.
No one.
And with the way she loved her daughter, I couldn't do that to her. I couldn’t put that vibrant little girl in danger like I had my own son. I was destined to be alone forever, and that was fine with me. I’d had my chance. I’d created my family. Then, I’d squandered it by becoming comfortable, and I paid the price for my comfort. Men like me didn’t lead comfortable lives. I got selfish. Greedy. I let my guard down, and it had cost me my family.
I wasn’t going to let my guard down for anyone else.
A knock at my front door pulled me from my trance. I put my beer down and made my way to the front door. I picked up my gun off the kitchen table and tucked my hand behind the front door. My entire body was alert for whatever was on the other side.
“Is he home?”
“I’m not sure, sweetie.”
“But we made cookies.”
I opened the door and found my neighbor and her little girl standing on my front porch.
“Told you,” the girl said with a grin.
“Told her what?” I asked.
“That you were home. Your truck’s in the garage,” she said.
“Observant,” I said.
“Thanks. I get it from my daddy.”
My eyes whipped over to my neighbor, and I watched a sort of pain rise in her eyes. Her gaze faltered, and she swallowed hard. To most, the moment would’ve passed them by without them acknowledging it. But I saw it, and I knew. It was a pain only those who had experienced it would recognize. I held her gaze as she brought her eyes back to mine and held out the cookies for me to take. My heart thundered in my ears for a few seconds.
“We made these for you,” she said. “I’m Cindy, by the way.”
“What for?” I asked.
“The cookies?” she asked. “For helping my daughter with her knee.”
“See? It’s all better now thanks to you,” the little girl said.
“I didn’t do much. Your mother took care of you,” I said.
“Well, you helped,” the little girl said.
“Hardly.”
“Just take the cookies,” she said, looking annoyed like only a five-year-old could.
It was hard not to laugh.
“You’re a feisty one, aren’t you?” I asked.
“Yep. I get that from Mommy.”
I watched a grin spread across Cindy’s cheeks as a pang of hurt pinched my gut. She really was a beautiful woman and filled with a hurt I understood.
In any other lifetime, I might’ve even cared to introduce myself to her.
“What’s your name?” the little girl asked.
“What’s yours?” I asked.
“Lillian. But everyone calls me Lily.”
“Graham,” I said.
I held a brief staring contest with the little girl until a smile broke across her face.
“Take the cookies,” she said.
“They’re for you, after all,” Cindy said.
“You didn’t have to make them,” I said.
“And you didn’t have to help my daughter,” Cindy said.
“I guess she does get her feistiness from you.”
Another moment passed between us before I reached my hand out to take the plate of cookies.
“How’s your knee?” I asked.
“It’s fine. Mommy put me in a bath, and it really hurt, but I was brave,” Lily said.
“It’s good to be brave. Sometimes we have to be, even when we don’t wanna be,” I said.
I watched the small girl light up with pride, and it reminded me of my son. That same kind of pride and that same strong stance. Whoever Cindy was, she was raising her girl well, raising her to be strong and independent like I’d tried to do with my son. Memories of him came crashing back. Us working on the truck together and running around in the yard. I remembered his first skinned knee and how much he wanted to cry as I cleaned it up.
But no matter how much he wanted to cry, he didn’t.
He had been so brave.
Just like Lily.
I pushed the thoughts of my son away before they threatened to take over and set the cookies on the counter. I was still concealing the gun in my hand behind the door as I stood in the cracked doorway. The three of us were awkwardly standing there, not knowing what to do.
“I hate to cut the pow-wow short, but I got somewhere to be,” I said finally.
“We didn’t mean to keep you,” Cindy said.
I wanted to slam the door and lock them on the porch, but the look on Lily’s face stopped me from being a complete asshole. “Thanks for the cookies,” I managed.
“You’re welcome,” Cindy said. “Come on, booger. Let’s give Graham some privacy.”
“But I wanna stay and play,” Lily said.