She frowned. "That's not exactly the reassurance I was looking for."
"I think it would be great for Hayley to have you in her life, in whatever capacity you and her parents are willing to accept. I just don't know what it's going to do to you to be with her and not be able to tell her you're her birth mother. I don’t want to see you sad or hurting. If this is going to be too difficult, we'll just drop that present on the porch," he said, motioning to the brightly-wrapped gift in her hand. "And head to the airport."
"It is going to be hard, but I want to do it. And you know what makes it a little easier?"
"What's that?"
"It's not Hayley's real birthday. That won't be for five days."
"That's right. The birth certificate was altered. Someone is going to have to fix that some time."
"Some time, but not now. Not while Hayley is still fragile."
"She's doing good. I've seen her once or twice. She's bouncing back. It will take time, but I think she'll be able to put all this behind her."
"I'm sure she's confused about what it was all about. Stix talked about her being my daughter when we were on the stage, but she was crying so loudly, I didn't know if she heard or not. I hoped she hadn't."
"She doesn't appear to have said anything about that."
"That's good."
He took her hand. "Let's go."
The front door was open, so they walked inside. The living room hallway, living room, and dining room were decorated with streamers and filled with kids and adults. A buffet had been spread out on the dining room table. A huge vanilla-iced birthday cake decorated with pink and purple bunnies sat on a side table. It was sure to be a hit with all the kids.
She searched the crowd for Hayley and felt a rush of love and happiness when her little girl came running down the hall. Hayley wore a pretty blue dress, her long brown hair flowing out behind her, her brown eyes glittering with happiness.
"You came," Hayley said with delight, as she held out her arms.
Bree swept her into a hug, so happy at Hayley's reaction. There was no shyness, no restraint, no lingering fear or sadness. When she let her go, she said, "Happy Birthday."
"I'm so glad you're here," Hayley said, hanging on to Bree's hand. "I want you to meet my parents and my friends and see my room."
"I want to do all of that," she said with a laugh.
"Come upstairs first," Hayley said.
She glanced back at Nathan. He gave her a smile and a nod of encouragement. "Go. I'll be right here. And take your time."
She would definitely take all the time that she was given, and she would cherish every second.
*
"That goofy smile on your face must mean that Bree is somewhere nearby," Josie said, giving Nathan a nudge in the ribs with her elbow.
"She went upstairs with Hayley to see her room."
"Hayley is thrilled that Bree said she'd come to her party. She's been talking on and on about Bree to Grace. She's almost as taken with Bree as you are."
He grinned. "Bree is very loveable."
"Oh, I know. I always liked her. I just didn't always like the way she treated you."
"All that is in the past, Josie."
"I still don't know everything that happened."
"And you don't need to know," he said quickly. While he felt slightly guilty that he hadn't told Josie that Bree was Hayley's mother, he had to respect Bree's decision to keep the secret until the Jansens decided the truth should come out. "All that's important is what's coming next. I hope you and Grace and Kyle will consider doing Christmas in California this year. We'd like to host."
"Let's see…sunny, seventy-degree days in Santa Monica, or wind chill of minus eight in Chicago? It's a tough call. Yes, of course, we'll be there. I'm going to book tickets next week. And Kyle is going to make sure he gets the time off. After everything that happened with Hayley, I think he has started to realize the importance of spending time with your family when you can."
"I'm glad."
"And I'm glad you're with Bree. She's the love of your life. She always has been."
"Yes, she has," he admitted.
"While I'll miss you, I think starting over in California is going to be good for you. And you won't have to worry about snow; you can build houses all year round."
"I'm looking forward to the change. But I'm going to miss you and Grace—and Kyle," he added belatedly.
She laughed at that. "I know you and Kyle don't see eye-to-eye, but I love you both."
"I'm still going to keep my eye on you," he promised.
"I have no doubt." Her gaze turned serious. "But to be honest, Nathan, I have let you consider me your responsibility for far too long. I needed you when I was a kid. You got me through life. You saved me more than once. But I'm okay now. I probably should have said that a long time ago. I'm doing good, and I'm not in danger of going backward. I've got my life together. I'm not interested in drugs or alcohol or any of the vices I got swept up into. You don't have to worry about me anymore. Just be happy. It's your turn." She gave him a hug and blinked away some tears. "This sucks. I really hate good-byes."
"It's not good-bye. We're going to see each other at Christmas."
"I know. It won't be same, but it will be fine. And maybe one day you can give Grace a cousin."
"You're getting a little ahead of yourself."
"As if you haven't thought about having a little girl who looks just like Bree," she teased. "But a son would be good, too. I know Bree has a career, but maybe one day."
"Definitely one day," he promised.
*
Bree smiled as she sat on the end of Hayley's bed and watched her daughter name off every one of the stuffed animals in her collection.
She'd never been able to hang on to her toys as a child. And she'd stopped naming anything, because as soon as she did, it was almost guaranteed to disappear. But Hayley didn't live with that uncertainty. And even though she'd been through a horrible ordeal, she seemed to now trust again in the safety of her life.
She was so glad to see that. She hated to think that her child would be forever scarred by someone wanting revenge on her and Johnny.
"Mommy got me a new bunny," Hayley said, taking a very white, very fluffy bunny from the center of her bed. "I left the other one at the house by the lake. But I like this one better."
"I love all your animals and your room. It's so pretty. I wish I would have had a room like this when I was growing up."
"Sometimes I get scared in the dark," Hayley said suddenly, her gaze turning serious. "Sometimes, Mommy sleeps with me. I think she gets scared, too."
"I understand. But you don't have to be afraid anymore. You're safe now."
"I wish you could stay here. Mommy says you don't live in Chicago."
"No, I don't," she said, a lump growing in her throat. "But I'll come and visit you whenever I can. And you can write me if you want."
"Will you write me back? I like to get email. I like to get real letters, too. Which do you like?"
"I like them both. And I will definitely write you back. I will always be available if you need me, Hayley. You can write me or call me. I'll make sure you always have my phone number."
"Mommy says you're like my guardian angel."
"I like the sound of that," she said with a smile. "Too bad I don't have any wings."
Hayley giggled. "Then you could fly."
"That would be fun." She looked up as Lindsay came into the room with a tentative expression on her face.
"I hope I'm not interrupting," Lindsay said. "It's time to open your presents, Hayley."
"Yay!" Hayley clapped her hands with delight.
"Why don't you go downstairs and help Grandma put them in a pile for you?" Lindsay suggested. "Bree and I will be right down."
"Okay."
As Hayley ran from the room, Bree got to her feet. "I appreciate you inviting me."
"Hayley really wanted you to come. She's been talking about you nonstop since you left." She paused. "I wanted you to come, too. I never had a chance to really say thank you."