“Don’t let me go,” I half whisper and feel his grip tighten back on me.
“I’d never let you go.” Phillip looks down at me, and I can see a trace of that anger slip away when his eyes come to mine. Like I can cool him. That I have this special power over him. Maybe I do.
“I came to your office. I’d wanted to talk to you about something that was bothering me. I thought you were having an affair…” I trail off because I can’t even believe my own words anymore.
“I would never.” He repeats his words from moments ago, but I cut him off.
“She was naked in your office.” I glance over at Cary, then back to Phillip. “You were on the sofa. Clothes rumpled, shoes off. I thought…” The night flashes back into my mind. I push hard to remember every detail. I’d been avoiding doing that because it was painful to even think about it, let alone try to remember every part of it.
“Get the fuck out of this building,” Phillip says curtly.
“I’m sorry. I just wanted to be with you. I thought we’d be perfect together. I swear, I didn’t know your wife would walk in on us like that. I was going to wake you. Show you how it could be. It was stupid. I see that now. Please don’t let this get out. I just…” Cary stumbles over her words. “I wanted you. I thought if I offered myself…”
“What part of get the fuck out of my office are you not getting? Do it yourself, or I’ll have security do it because I’m sure as fuck not touching you. Just like I’ve sure as fuck never touched you before.” He bellows the last part, and I swear the walls of the office rattle.
Cary jumps, running out of the office faster than I thought a person could in heels.
“If I’d known—” Ryan says, but Phillip raises his hand, cutting him off.
“Leave. I’ll deal with you later.” Ryan just nods tightly and follows Cary out the door. Phillip moves to the door and shuts it. Then I hear the lock click, the sound echoing around in the room.
He turns, leaning up against the locked office door.
I just stand there staring at him, guilt eating at me.
I go to step towards him, wanting to touch him, but he holds his hand up and I stop. Guilt tugs at my heart even more.
“I didn’t see her that night in my office. I’d passed out on the sofa and came to later. I’d actually told Ryan to fire her because I thought she’d been flirting with me, which was unacceptable. I’d murder anyone who flirted with you.” He takes a deep breath. “I need a second to get myself under control. I’m not mad at you. I’m just feeling a lot of things right now and I’m not sure what I’ll do.” He reaches up, running his hands though his midnight-black hair like he’s trying to calm himself. I can see the tension in every line of his body.
“You’d never hurt me,” I counter, knowing he’d never lay a hand on me. Hell, I’d just smacked him and he took it.
“I don’t know about that. I’d really like to spank your ass right now, then bend you over that couch and fuck the shit out of you just to show you that you’re the only woman I’ve ever fucked in this office. Ever.”
It’s like every emotion I’m feeling goes straight to my core. Phillip has never talked to me like that. But he’s been doing a lot of things differently this past week. He hasn’t slept with me since I’ve been back. It’s been over four months, a record for us. We barely went twenty-four hours without making love before I ran. Even when he worked late, he’d crawl into bed and climb right on top of me.
“I’m okay with that.” I start to slip off my dress. Wanting that. Wanting us skin on skin. To let his warmth fill me up. Ease this ache.
“Don’t,” he growls, stopping me. “First we’re going to clear up some things.”
I drop my hand and shake my head.
“You thought I was having an affair before you even came here that night?” he asks, studying me, recalling my words to him. I had, but I’d discounted those thoughts. I’d come here to tell him how I’d been feeling for those past few months.
“I…” God, I feel terrible. How could I have let this get this far? “You’d started coming home later and later. I felt like there were secrets. Then the way she’d treat me,” I nod towards the door, out to where Cary’s desk sits, “when I called or stopped by. It pissed me off. Then Cindy said I was crazy, and to come and talk to you. So I did, but when I got here and saw her naked, I…”
“Your dad,” he finishes for me. I was going to say I freaked out and ran, but yeah, a big part of that was my dad. Phillip went right to the root of it. I drop my head, looking at my feet, feeling shame that I let that get between us.