Tobias stood frozen on all fours in front of her, and now her anger was so great she rushed him and bit his neck. She couldn’t pierce his tough hide, and now her mouth was full of fur. Tobias didn’t act like he was affected it all, which pissed her off more, so she clamped down harder until her teeth felt like they were coming loose from her head. Releasing him, she shoved him instead. There. “You deserved that, mate.” Stifling a sob, she stooped and picked up the package, then lifted her chin primly and addressed the misfits. “I will not miss any of you asshats.” Then she marched off into the woods toward the runway she’d been manicuring for her knight in shining bear-fur to come rescue her.
Ignoring the trickling warmth that tickled her boob and her back, she stomped this way and that through the alder brush.
About halfway to the runway, Tobias asked from behind her, “Are you okay?”
She went to toss him an angry glare over her shoulder, but stopped dead in her tracks. He was back in his human form, naked as a jaybird, and oh my! She tripped on a tree root, lurched forward, and landed on top of the package with an oomf.
Tobias yanked her upward then spun her in his arms. Hands on her shoulders, he hunched down to look at her eye level. “Are you hurt?”
Her boob and back, yes. Her pride? Definitely yes. Her eyeballs? Hell no, but he was still in trouble. “Your dick is showing,” she said grumpily. “And just so you know, it’s ridiculous of you to have a boner right now.”
He straightened up and hooked his hands on his hips, eyebrow arched. “Well, I’ve never claimed anyone before.”
“Biting me while you’re a bear gets you off?”
“And fighting.”
“I’m traumatized. And your dick is the size of my arm. You should’ve told me that before you signed the damned contract.” She gestured toward it, palms out, fingers splayed. She couldn’t stop staring. “I mean, how do you even—”
“Oh, enough. You aren’t mad at my dick. You’re mad that I bit you like that, but what was I supposed to do? Your entire village was shifting and yeah, I can take them, but I was worried about you. I saw that asshole touch you and I lost my head, okay? It’s not how I imagined biting someone either!”
Grumpily, she crossed her arms over her chest and glared at his bleeding body. He was covered in Harlan’s quills. “You look like a pin cushion.”
“Yeah, well I didn’t know your backwoods boyfriend was a freaking porcupine. A porcupine? Really? I didn’t even know they existed.”
“Island of Misfit Shifters, Tobias. Always expect the unexpected with us.”
He winced as he shifted his weight off the leg that had long black quills sticking out of it. “What are you?”
“Rude.” She turned and picked up the box, then continued her angry march toward the plane.
“You know what I am,” he said from behind. “And we’re mated now, officially, so I don’t see what the big deal is.”
Ignoring him, she gritted her teeth against the pain in her teat and high-kneed it over a tall patch of grass. The storm clouds were beginning to open up, drizzling rain over them. “If you have pliers, I can get the quills out of you before we take off. The idiots won’t follow us anymore. They’re dumb as bricks, but they love their traditions. You bit me. I’m yours. They lost.”
“I’d appreciate you taking these out,” he said in a strained voice. “And I’m sorry about where I bit you. I was aiming for higher up, but you moved.”
“I thought I would have a pretty scar, Tobias. One I could show off to my friends when I wear tank tops in the summers.”
“Do you have a lot of friends?”
“No. Have you seen Perl Island? Inbred weirdos only. I thought I could latch onto your brother’s mate like a barnacle and make her be my friend.”
“Elyse?”
“Yeah.”
“How do you know about her?”
“Because I did my research before I hired you, McBeefcake. The fact that you have a built-in family was one of the pros. I wrote them down.”
“Pros and cons?”
She made her way around a giant pine tree. “Yep.”
“What were the cons?” His voice was sounding more and more pained, and she got it. Harlan’s quills had barbs that dug deeper and deeper the longer they were left alone. Tobias didn’t know it yet, but pulling them out would hurt worse than when they went in. He probably didn’t actually care about this conversation. More likely he was trying to take his mind off the pain.
“Uhhh,” she stalled, trying to remember what she’d written down. “All of my research was done via radio or satellite phone when Harlan-the-guard-porcupine was passed out drunk, so I hadn’t seen your picture. Therefore, I assumed you were probably hideous, or why wouldn’t you be mated already…”
“Because hibernation,” he muttered.
Ignoring him, she continued. “Probably likes doggy-style, eats a lot, probably snores. Also, I assumed you were dumb.”
“Why?”
“Because you are a bear.”
Tobias snorted an offended sound. “Bears aren’t dumb.”
“Hey, I was fine with dumb. Pros—biggest animal shifter, naturally protective instincts, family, good job, probably doesn’t smell like beef jerky.”