Forgotten Silence: Grey Wolves Novella (The Grey Wolves #10.5)

“What do you mean, is it a part of me?”

“Each of us has some measure of darkness in us, child.” The sprite’s smooth voice filled the space. She didn’t sound harsh, just matter of fact. “We all have the capacity to do great evil. We have a choice. Shall I go in this direction that leads to good, healthy things, or do I go in this direction which gives me the illusion of satisfaction for a brief second as it slowly kills my soul? But not all darkness comes from within. Sometimes, outside influences slip in unnoticed. I want you to feel this darkness and determine if it is yours or something else.”

Sally turned toward the darkness that undulated like a charmed snake in a corner of her mind. It was so strange to see her mind as a room. Sally knew her brain was a pink mass filled with firing synapses, but this place was a rectangular room with dark corners hiding the secrets of psyche. The darkness shifted again, drawing her attention back to itself.

She took a step toward the black mass, even though her body was screaming at her to turn and run. She took another step, and still another, until she was able to reach out her hand and touch it.

She heard Costin’s growl but didn’t pull her hand away. The consequence of her action was immediate. Sally felt as though she’d swallowed a bag of cotton. She couldn’t get any air in her lungs no matter how hard she tried. Was it real? Could she really not breathe, or was this just something happening in her mind?

As quickly as the air had left her, it returned, and she was surrounded by memories. She could hear his voice, smell his scent, and even feel his skin on hers. Jericho.

“No,” she said firmly.

“What do you feel?” Diedre’s voice crashed into Sally’s ears, helping the gypsy healer pull herself from the hurricane of emotions that was swirling within her.

“I feel him. The werewolf imposter. He’s in that darkness. He’s taunting me.”

“Is it yours?”

“No.” Sally understood now what the sprite meant. The darkness that danced in front of her wasn’t hers. It had been left there by someone else.

“It’s going to get warm in here,” Diedre said. “And I apologize, but we will see some of your memories. Sally, visible light isn’t the only thing that banishes darkness. Darkness is deceit. Its intent is to cover and conceal, to lie. So while we will shine the light into the darkness, we will also draw out the truth. Truth breaks the chains with which lies and deceit bind. Do you want the truth to rip through the lies, Sally?”

“Yes.” Sally backed up until she was pressed against a wall and slid down to the floor. She wasn’t there long.

“Stand, child of mine,” a bright light filled her vision, and Sally had to cover her eyes.

Sally obeyed and rose back to her feet. “Great Luna?”

“I hurt with you, Sally, precious mate to Costin. I have caught every tear you’ve cried, but I did not remove the pain. You are doing the right thing. Remove what is in secret, pour light into the darkness, and expose the lie and the truth. This I will bless.”

There was no easing into it. One minute there was no light and the next it flooded her. Sally was sure that light was probably shining out of the pours in her skin. She was suddenly outside of her mind and back in her own body. She could no longer see the room, but she was aware of what was happening. She could feel the heat radiating through her and feel the burn of truth as it began to expose the lies.

Memories began to be pulled from the darkness, but they weren’t real. These were the things that had been implanted like subliminal messages. One by one, they were revealed.

“Little healer, he will not want you if he ever finds you,” Jericho whispered as he walked by her in the bar. Sally didn’t even act like she’d heard him.

“Little healer, your worth is tied to your ability to be faithful to your true mate. Brown eyes, you have not been faithful.” These words were whispered to her as he stood beside her drying glasses at the end of a shift. Again, Sally never moved or said anything.

“Little healer, he will always wonder if you desire me more.”

As the light shown brighter and brighter, the suppressed memories were exposed until there was only a shadow left.

“That shadow is your own darkness, Sally,” Diedre said. “We have excised the implanted darkness, but only you can defeat your own darkness. We will help. Listen carefully.”

Sally heard her parent’s voices. “You are growing into a remarkable young woman, Sally.” Sally could see the memory. She was in their kitchen, ten years old.

“I want to be remarkable now.” Sally sighed. “Jacque is so free spirited, and Jen is so confident, and I’m just me.”

“Look at me, daughter of mine.” Her mom nudged her chin with the knuckle of her finger. “There is no such thing as just anyone. Every single person is unique in this world, and uniqueness is what makes something special. That means we are all special in our own way. You are special. You are unique. There is only one of you in this entire world. One day you will realize your worth, though your father and I will continue to try to get you to see it sooner rather than later.”

Jen and Jacque’s voices filled her head next, and the memory bloomed in her mind. They were sitting in Jacque’s backyard staring up at the night sky. They were freshmen in high school, and the school year was nearly over. She remembered that night like it had happened yesterday. “I wish I could be like you, Sally,” Jen said as she re-braided her hair, which she did like fifty times that night.

“Why on earth would you want to be like me? So guys won’t notice you, and you blush if they actually do?” Sally asked.

“Do you really want me to dignify those questions with an answer?” Jen asked. When Sally didn’t respond, Jen continued. “Now, as I was saying, I wish I was like you because you see good in bad things. You see good in people and situations that I can’t.”

“What are you talking about?” Sally frowned.

“When you got the flu over winter break you never complained, and you said, ‘At least I don’t have to get dragged into washing holiday dishes.’ When we got detention for the stunt we pulled on the football field with the baby powder, you were all, ‘It’s like a free period where we can just hang out.’ When you built that volcano in seventh grade for the science fair, it was amazing, and everyone knew you would win, and then you dropped it as you climbed out of the car. You shrugged and said, ‘Maybe someone else needs to win more than I do.’” Jen turned to look her in the eyes. “You don’t see yourself, Sally. But we do. We see you, and we like the hell out of what we see.”

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