“But then you went on to have more children. That’s very interesting, Gregory.” Aiden snatched his drink off the table and gave the straw what for… anything to squelch his true, angry voice…
“Look, I know what you’re thinkin’ and nobody is perfect, but I did eventually get myself together, many years later. And for the record, not that it may matter to you at this point, I did try to find you one time.”
Aiden placed his drink down. “How?”
“I was asking around, things like that. I had been thinking about my life, about you and Barbara. Nobody knew where she was, only that she’d moved to another spot and had another son. I figured she’d moved on by then, gotten married. I decided to leave well enough alone.”
“But see, that’s just the thing, Greg… things were not well enough.” Aiden could feel the heat building within him, and he was on the verge of an explosion. “For the first decade or so of my life, I used to wonder where the hell my father was. I would ask and Mom would say she didn’t know. All I had was your name. She told me that you up and left, and you’ve admitted that. But, some pretty messed up things happened to my mother after you left, things that messed her up so bad, she could not take care of herself and she damn sure couldn’t take care of two little boys.”
The man looked at him in surprise, as if it just couldn’t be.
“Sweet, little Barbara, Gregory, turned into a raging alcoholic. She also would lie to several different doctors to get pain medications and she’d sometimes pop upward of ten different pills a day. Pills she did not need. She’d chase them with booze. At times, me and my brother would wake up and think she was dead, and often, we wished she was! So, no, Gregory, you leaving well enough alone was bullshit! Nothing was well!”
His rising voice attracted the attention of some people. His father kept calm, looking somber even as Aiden lost his resolve.
“I’m sorry, Aiden.” The man’s eyes glossed over. “I didn’t know… I swear, I didn’t know. I woulda come for you if I’d known.”
Aiden pounded the table a few good times. Tears filled his eyes and zigzagged down his cheeks.
“I…needed…you. I needed…someone… to help me! I needed someone to hear me!”
Gregory stood and snatched him in his arms.
“I’m so sorry, Aiden! I can’t say sorry enough. I can’t make the hurt stop, but I want to try to make it up to you the best I can!” The man released him, his face so beet-red, he looked as if he may just pass out. Gregory bent at the waist as if he needed to catch his breath. Aiden gently took the man’s arm and ushered him back into his seat, then returned to his own. Handing the man one of his napkins, he watched the guy wipe his eyes and blow his nose.
“Is your mother still alive, Aiden?” he finally asked after a long silence.
“Yes. She is in an outpatient drug and alcohol rehabilitation program. She was in an in-house program for a while, had a relapse, and returned of her own free will. She’s now been sober for about two months and she, uh… she is really trying.” The tears wouldn’t stop falling.
“That’s good to know ’cause she was a good person. Sorry about her getting wrapped up like that. I know it must’ve been tough.” Aiden nodded but looked away, needing a breather. “Aiden, I fucked up.” The guy laughed mirthlessly. “I can see by your facial expression right now and everything you just said to me, you and I got some time to spend with one another. Can you help me help you? I need you to let me in your life, Aiden, if you want me to stand up and do this. I want to be your father, Aiden. I told my wife about everything, and then I called you. There’s no excuse for me leaving you behind. A part of me thought I was doing the right thing and the other part of me was a coward, afraid my wife would leave me if she found out that I cheated on her again. And not just that, but this time, a baby came of it…”
“So this wasn’t your first affair? Did my mom know about all of this? I thought you two were exclusive.”
“There were shitloads of women, Aiden. I loved sex, and I was wild and crazy back then but I loved your mother, Aiden, I honestly did. You have no idea! I’ve only loved four women in my entire lifetime.” He began to count off his fingers. “My mother, God rest her soul, my wife Vicki, Barbara … your mother … and my daughter, Rebecca. Period. I know you’re mad as hell at me and you’ve got every right to be. Your mother was going through some shit and you and your brother apparently got the brunt of it. I was nowhere in sight. I deserve that anger. I deserve for you to stand up, walk outta here and wash your hands of me, but I am being one hundred percent honest with you, man.
“I sat here and told you the truth! I didn’t try to say something stupid like your mom told me you weren’t mine. I didn’t try to say I didn’t know she was pregnant, or that she was sleeping with a bunch of guys when she and I were together. I didn’t try to say that I didn’t believe the baby was mine. That would have been a bunch of lies and I’m tired of lying! I’m not going to sit here and look at my son… shit, yeah… you’re my son…”
He hung his head and sobbed. Aiden remained quiet, but his anger began to dissipate, replaced with empathy. “I’m not going to sit here and look into the eyes of a man I haven’t seen since he was only a few hours out of the womb, and lie to him… and I’m not going to tell you that I can make it all better, go away, because that’s a lie, too. But what I can promise you is that from this damn day forward, you’ve got a father!” He jabbed the table with his finger. “I’m here, and I’m not goin’ anywhere, for as long as you want me!”
Coming to a decision, Aiden got up from his seat and enveloped Greg into a hug. The man wrapped his arms around him and squeezed, this time harder than before. At last, Greg released him and held his face with both hands, gazing into his eyes.
“I want to know all about you! I want you to meet your brother and sister, tell me what you do for work, where you went to school, what sports you like to play… Are you dating, married, got kids? I want to know all of it! I want to see pictures. I want us to go out and I want you with me because that’s where you belong!”
Aiden swiped at the tears forming in his eyes and hugged the guy once again. As they rocked back and forth, the emotions caught in his throat, unable to come out. As painful as it was, a part of him was liberated at that moment. He was able to finally ask the questions that had bothered him for years and get the answers. But, his heart sank when he thought of Perry… how his brother may never get this experience. Even a rejection from a father was better than not knowing at all. Maybe if all worked out well, Gregory would be good to Perry, too. He sure hoped so because, in Aiden’s mind, he and his little brother were a package deal. To love one, you had to love them both…
CHAPTER TWENTY
The Next Generation
One month later…