Texas Blue

chapter 9



LEWT WASHED UP ON WHAT LOOKED LIKE A CLOSED-IN porch, then joined the others for dinner. The meal was excellent, the conversation lively, but he found himself holding back. Part of him wasn’t ready to share with strangers all that had happened to him today. Rose seemed pleased that he’d wanted to take a look at the ranch, but Bethie said she missed him terrible. Lewt didn’t know that he believed either one of them.

He hadn’t lied to M. In a strange way he’d felt more alive today than he could ever remember feeling. He liked breathing air that wasn’t polluted with cigar smoke and cheap perfume. He liked feeling like he was doing some good even though it was hard work. Tomorrow he’d probably be lucky if he could get out of bed.

If he was going to list his likes, he’d have to add liking being with M. She played no games, never flirted with him or tried to manipulate him. He knew she didn’t like him and within a few minutes he’d figured out that if he tried to impress her, she’d probably send him back to the barn. So for the most part, he just tried his best and kept his mouth closed.

Half the time he felt like a bumbling idiot around her, and the other half she was reminding him that his feelings were accurate. He didn’t know how to pretend with her, how to play games. About the time he decided she was more man than he’d ever be, she’d pulled away from his touch. He’d seen the hurt flash in her eyes for a second. All he’d done was touch her shoulder. Her reaction was that of a wounded animal. He’d give a rich pot to know what had made her react so.

“How was your day?” Rose asked as she passed him a basket of bread.

“What?” Lewt had heard the words, but he couldn’t climb out of his thoughts long enough to think of an answer.

Rose smiled. “When Sumner told me you rode out to check the herd, I was surprised. Exhausting, isn’t it?”

“Very.” He smiled at the beautiful lady, silently thanking her for erasing the awkwardness. “You do have a beautiful ranch, Miss Rose.”

“Thank you, Lewt. I sometimes forget what a wonderful place this is, and then I leave for a few days and remember. When Emily and I were away at school we used to lie in bed every night and take turns describing details of the ranch and laughing about all the things we’d do when we got home. Those were the two loneliest years of my life. If it hadn’t been for my sister, I’m not sure I would have survived. Every break, when we’d come home all excited and leave crying, my mother felt our homesickness. When it was Bethie’s turn to go, the thought of her having to go alone broke our hearts. Mama talked my papa into letting her have tutors come in. He said any finishing Bethie needed could be taught by us.”

She patted his arm. “Now don’t you think our little sister’s education was lacking. She speaks French and can write poems as fine as the old masters, in my opinion. And, thanks to private tutors, she can play the piano so beautifully the angels cry with joy.”

Lewt smiled and tried to follow Rose’s soft voice, but his mind was wondering, thinking about how he’d worked with M to doctor a few of the stock, then later how he’d watched her long fingers slide over the cotton of the bandage across his leg. His touch might frighten her half to death, but her touch certainly didn’t have that effect on him.

“Lewt, you must try one of these buttermilk biscuits. Bethie made them, you know. She’s a grand cook, though her art and sewing take up much of her time.”

He took a biscuit and tried to keep his mind on the conversation as Rose continued to praise her sister. It crossed his mind that maybe Rose was building up Bethie a little too much.

Lewt looked down the table as Beth laughed at something Davis said. Maybe the green-eyed beauty had told her sister she was interested in him. That’s it, he reasoned. There was a chance the impossible might just happen.

The reverend had made a rule that the seating changed every night, so Lewt knew he’d be sitting next to either Beth or Emily tomorrow night. Beth might be interested in him, but he planned to take his time and visit with each of the girls. It was only fair.

He smiled at Rose and tried to think of something to say. She was truly lovely, and black-haired women had always been his favorite. Her dark eyes seemed those of a very old soul. If he married Rose, they’d have long talks in the evening and she’d worry about him as all caring wives do.

But as he looked into her dark eyes, he remembered the blue eyes he’d seen this afternoon and how frightened they’d looked. He could think of nothing to say but, “A woman with an initial for a name showed me around today. Do you know her?”

Rose looked confused for a moment, then laughed. “You mean Em. E-m. She’s taking care of the horses while Papa is away.”

“Em,” he said. “Short for Emily?”

“I guess,” Rose said before taking a bite, then adding when she finally swallowed, “Maybe they started calling her Em so they wouldn’t get her confused with our Emily. Two Emilys on the ranch could be confusing.”

Lewt had spent his life reading people, and he had no trouble realizing that if Rose wasn’t lying, she was definitely leaving something out. He didn’t want to push it. After all, Em was just someone he needed to reach a goal. As soon as he figured out enough to bluff his way through a conversation about the ranch, he’d never see the tall woman who dressed like a man again.

He gave Rose his full attention. “I hope I didn’t miss anything today while I was out riding.”

She smiled sweetly. “Oh, you did. We planned a party for Friday night. Beth is so kind, she never wants to leave anyone out, so we’ll have the house full of people. She’s even thought of organizing a small band so we can dance. If Beth is in the room, everyone always has a grand time.”

Back to singing Beth’s praises. Lewt was starting to wonder if something wasn’t wrong with the girl if her big sister had to keep pointing out her good side.

“And”—Rose beamed—“this afternoon, we all gathered round the piano and sang songs. You should have heard Mrs. Allender. She has a voice angels would envy. Boyd joined us for a few minutes, then spotted a book on horse breeding he hadn’t read. We didn’t see him for the rest of the afternoon.” Rose giggled. “Just between you and me, I’ll bet he was sitting just outside the door listening.”

“Did Davis and Emily join in any of the singing?”

“Davis did, but Emily said she’d be our audience while she sewed.”

Lewt leaned back. Apparently, he’d missed nothing. He would have had a hard time not looking bored, and the only songs he knew were not proper for anywhere but saloons. This act of being a gentleman wasn’t as easy as he thought.

Rose tugged at his sleeve. “Tomorrow, if it doesn’t rain, we’re going riding and plan to have a picnic on the summit of the hill the Apache named Whispering Mountain. Did you know there is a legend that my ancestors used to believe that says if a man sleeps on the summit of Whispering Mountain, he’ll dream his future? My papa tells a story about how his father climbed to the summit when he was just married and settling here. He dreamed his death in a battle beside a mission. He spent the next twelve years of his life building the ranch and preparing his three sons to take over when he died.”

“I’ve heard that story.” Lewt smiled. “Duncan talks about how three little boys, his father one of them, took over and held the ranch against raiders.”

“My papa was twelve when his father was killed at the Battle of Goliad. Teagen McMurray had to become a man the day they learned his father was dead. My mama, when she met him years later, said he was hard as granite. She was a widow with three tiny girls who saw his heart from the first. Even today when she looks at him, anyone can see the love in her eyes.”

Lewt lowered his voice. “So Teagen McMurray isn’t your real father?”

“He’s our real papa and he’d shoot anyone who questioned it. Our ‘real father’ lived in Chicago and was given to drink. I don’t remember much about him except that he liked to yell at my mother. When he died of pneumonia one winter, Mama brought us here. She married Teagen and we became a family. Sometimes Papa grumbles and complains that it took us too long to get here. He says he was lonely for a long time waiting for us to come.”

Lewt felt an ache deep down, as if a wound had bruised his heart. He didn’t know Teagen, the head of the McMurrays, but he knew what the man meant. When he’d been a boy he used to dream that he belonged someplace else, with other people. He’d dream that somewhere there was another world where people cared if he was warm or had food. Once in a while he’d almost believe that if he stepped sideways or jumped around a corner that world would be waiting for him, welcoming and warm.

Only it never appeared, and survival left little time for dreams.

He smiled down at Rose as she handed him a slice of pie. He had to marry one of these women. They knew how to build that comfortable loving world he’d never known. He told himself he wasn’t using them. Whichever one he married, he’d be good to. Better than good, he’d be caring. He never make her sorry she’d married him. Somehow, he’d figure out how to be the kind of man who’d marry a lady.

As they left the dining room, shy Emily took his arm. “We thought we’d all play cards tonight, Mr. Paterson. Do you play cards?”

The day’s exhaustion vanished as he said, “Now and then.”

Playing cards with this group was like fishing with a shotgun. Lewt offered to deal and as he did, he took control of the game.

First, he let Boyd Sinclair win. The rancher puffed up and informed the girls that they were no match for him. Lewt resented his superior attitude, but the ladies seemed to think it funny.

When Lewt shuffled again he tossed Boyd the winning hand, but to Lewt’s surprise, Boyd folded. The girls consoled him once again.

Lewt frowned. Apparently he didn’t understand the rancher as well as he thought he did.

Halfway through the evening he dealt a few hands where Beth won. She giggled with delight. Everyone, including Boyd, congratulated her on her brilliant play.

As the night aged and they all enjoyed the card game, Lewt found himself enjoying the game he was playing. He could tell a great deal about a man by how he acted when he was winning and, more important, how he acted when he lost. In life everyone wins and loses. The man who doesn’t handle himself well at losing usually can’t handle himself much better at winning.

Davis Allender rarely won a hand, but he never complained. In fact, he cheered the others on. By the end of the evening all three women were giggling and showing him their hands, and then he’d advise them. Boyd fought to win most of the time, but Davis walked away from the evening the real winner.

When the women said their good nights, Beth kissed Davis on the cheek for helping her. Lewt would have thought he’d be jealous, but to his surprise, he wasn’t. Beth was beautiful, but he had two others to pick from, and if she liked Davis, he didn’t mind.

The young man had kind eyes and a gentle way. He’d make the youngest McMurray woman a fine husband.

Lewt climbed the stairs to his room and collapsed. His leg still hurt, and hiding the fact through dinner and the card game had cost him energy he didn’t have. He was a man who needed little sleep, but this time he planned to take the night.

When he rolled over an hour before dawn, the throbbing in his leg finally woke him. He stood slowly, testing his weight on the leg, then tiptoed down the back stairs to the kitchen and stirred up the fire in the stove. A gentle rain tapping against the windows washed away any sound he made. He guessed it would be a while before the others woke. He planned to soak the bloody bandage off in a hot bath.

He found all he needed in the room they called the mudroom. Towels, a medicine box, a big tub, and lye soap. While the water heated, he lit one lamp in the kitchen and another in the mudroom. Then he put on a pot of coffee that would be ready before he finished his bath.

When he lowered his aching body into the tub, he couldn’t help but let out a deep sigh. Every muscle had been strained while working with the herd.

The water felt wonderful, and the slow rain outside settled his nerves. Lewt closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.