CHAPTER 31
The situation with Dillon had been handled better than he could have hoped. The new job he’d left the compound to pursue was dealing drugs. Moron. When Norm sent the guys out to pick him up for questioning, they found him with enough marijuana in his car to lock him up for a while. That didn’t mean his obsession with Savannah had ended, but at least he wouldn’t be able to get anywhere near her for a while. And when the time came, Cole would be there to keep her safe. Her hand squeezed his and Cole smiled at the gorgeous girl next to him.
“Almost home,” he said. Home. It had felt more like a home since Savannah had moved in.
“I can’t wait to see Cuddles.”
Cole pulled into the parking lot of his condo complex and his eyes couldn’t quite process the scene before him. Abbie was standing on the sidewalk, her arms folded over her chest watching his SUV approach. His eyes flashed to the clock on his dash. F*ck. A curse tore from his chest at the sight of her. He had missed their Sunday appointment and now she was here. Here. At his home. Savannah’s home.
He considered gunning the engine and tearing out of the parking lot, but he didn’t have the strength to lie to Savannah anymore. His past was here—staring down his future, shattering his heart into a million tiny pieces.
***
Watching the fragile dark-haired girl run to Cole and throw herself into his arms knocked the wind from Savannah’s chest. She placed a hand against the hood of the Tahoe to prop herself up. Cole placed his hands on the girl’s shoulders, gently moving her away from his body. His eyes flashed to Savannah’s, panic written all over his face.
“This is Abbie,” he said, but didn’t offer anything more.
Savannah hated the familiarity between them — the way Abbie’s body tilted towards his and the way his fingers had knowingly soothed down her arms as he moved her away. Abbie turned to look Savannah over, her bright blue eyes burning with curiosity. Abbie was thin and pretty with delicate features. She was dressed casually in a pair of worn jeans and flowing pink top that was too large on her tiny frame.
“Is this her?” Abbie asked him.
Cole nodded. “This is Savannah.”
Abbie’s gaze found Cole’s, seeking permission, before she thrust a hand out to Savannah. There were scars marring her inner wrist and when Savannah’s gaze lingered on the puckered white flesh, Abbie pulled her hand back and stuffed it into her pocket. “Hi,” Abbie offered, smiling carefully. “Cole’s told me a lot about you.”
Savannah remained speechless. She felt sick. Humiliated.
Abbie turned back to Cole, her expression softening. “You didn’t show up today, I got worried. Are you mad I came here?” She lifted a hand to his cheek, but Cole caught her wrist.
His eyes flashed back to Savannah. He flinched, opened his mouth, then closed it again. There was nothing he could say. Savannah’s skin tingled as awareness flooded her. This was who he spent every Sunday with?
The scars on Abbie’s wrists, the needy way she looked at Cole like a child separated from its mother, it struck her like a thump to the head — all the times he’d looked at her like she was unstable, fear in his eyes that she’d break down and lose it. Did he have some strange calling to save needy girls? She wasn’t like this girl, and she resented his careful watch even more now, because it meant memories of Abbie were still right there at the surface.
He turned to Savannah, handing her the keys. “Can you ah, give us a minute?”
Savannah wished she had some place to go — anywhere but inside his house. She wanted to flee somewhere far away from here, but she accepted the keys and ventured up the stairs, too stunned to cry, too shocked to process what she’d just learned.***
Cole had gotten rid of Abbie and ventured inside to talk to Savannah. He needed to come clean about everything—all of it—not spare any of the details.
He found Savannah hiding underneath the comforter in the guest room, whispering to a squirming mass under there with her. He’d let her down, and she’d turned to the dog for comfort. It was a sobering thought.
He sat quietly on the edge of the bed. Her whispering stopped as soon as the mattress dipped with his weight.
“You don’t have to talk to me. Just listen, okay?” He released a heavy sigh, knowing this conversation was long overdue. “I first met Abbie just after college. She was broken—a project for me—someone I could focus my energy on since I’d been so powerless to prevent my parents’ deaths.” Cole scrubbed his hands over his face. It was harder than he thought it’d be admitting all this out loud. “Abbie was a cutter, which I’d found out later. She was abused as a child. She was a wreck when we first started dating. Our relationship was full of self-doubt, jealousy, and at times intense passion.” Cole wished he could see Savannah’s expression, get a sense of how she was taking it. But the damned comforter covered her from head to toe. “We dated for two years, and eventually she got better. Later I came to realize that I wasn’t in love with her — I’d only been in love with the idea of saving someone. Once Abbie was well, the intensity behind our relationship all but disappeared.”
Savannah pushed the covers down, her face coming into view. He expected her to be crying, but her eyes were dry, curiously gazing at him; her face relaxed.
“I tried numerous times to break things off with her, but Abbie would freak out. So I’d stay. We hung on that way for another six months until I couldn’t endure the cycle anymore. I ended it for good.”
Cuddles squirmed her way out from the blankets and licked Savannah’s nose. She folded the puppy along her side and mumbled, “Keep talking.”
“I broke up with her and thought I was done. Of course, I hadn’t expected Abbie to try and end her life. But that same day, she’d slashed her wrists. Her roommate found her and rushed her to the hospital, and called me on the way. When I saw how truly broken she was—pale and weak in that hospital bed, tubes running everywhere—I knew it was my fault. I’d vowed to save her, and now she was worse off than she’d ever been. Because of me. It ate away at me, and I knew I couldn’t run again. Not when she was so incredibly fragile.
“Abbie stayed at the hospital for a few days, she’d lost a lot of blood, and when she recovered physically from the suicide attempt, she was taken to a psychiatric facility. She stayed there for over a year before she moved back into her own apartment, just down the road from here. We never rekindled our romantic relationship, but all this time—close to five years now—I’ve faithfully visited her every week, as a friend, and as her security blanket, I guess.”
Tears began to fill Savannah’s eyes as she sat stoically.
“Savannah? Please say something,” he begged.
Savannah grabbed her car keys and left.