Chapter Twenty Four
Ridge
Me: I’m looking at your schedule for
March. You’re free on the 18th.
Brennan: Why do I feel like I’m about to
be busy on the 18th?
Me: I’m planning a show, and I need your
help. We’ll do it locally.
Brennan: What kind of show? Full band?
Me: No, just you and me. Maybe Warren if
he’ll sign for us.
Brennan: Why do I feel like this has to do
with Sydney?
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Me: Why do I feel like I don’t care what
you feel like?
Brennan: The ball is in her court, Ridge.
You really should just leave things alone
until she’s ready. I know how you feel
about her, and I don’t want you to screw
it up.
Me: March 18 is still three months away.
If she hasn’t made up her mind by that
date, then all I’m doing is giving her a
little shove. And when did you start giving
relationship advice? How long has it been
since you were in one? Oh, wait. That
would be never.
Brennan: If I agree to help you, will you
STFU? What do you need me to do?
Me: Just carve out some time for me
between now and then to run through
some new songs.
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Brennan: Is someone over his writer’s
block?
Me: Yeah, well, someone once told me
heartache is good for lyrical inspiration.
Unfortunately, he was right.
Brennan: Sounds like a smart guy.
I close out my texts to Brennan and open one
up to Warren.
Me: March 18. I need a local venue. A
small one. Then I need you to get Sydney
to go there with you that night.
Warren: Is she supposed to know you or-
chestrated this?
Me: No. Lie to her.
Warren: Not a problem. I’m good at lying.
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I set my phone down, pick up my guitar, and
walk out onto my balcony. It’s been almost a
month since I last saw her. Neither of us has
texted the other. I know Warren still keeps in
contact with her, but he refuses to tell me any-
thing, so I just stopped asking. As much as I miss
her and as much as I want to beg her to just let
this begin with us, I know time is better for both
of us right now. There was still too much guilt
rolled up in the thought of starting something too
soon, despite how much we wanted to be togeth-
er. Waiting until we’re both in a good place is
definitely what needs to happen.
However, I feel as if I’m already there. Maybe
it’s easier for me because I know where Maggie
and I stand, and I know where my heart stands,
but Sydney doesn’t have that reassurance. If time
will give her that reassurance, then I’ll give her
time. Just not too much. March 18 is only three
months away. I hope to hell she’s ready by then,
because I’m not sure I can keep myself away
from her for longer than that.
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I scoot my chair to the edge of the balcony and
fold my arms over the railing, then look over at
her old balcony. Every time I come out here and
see her empty chair, it makes all of this so much
harder. But I can’t seem to find anything inside
my apartment that reminds me of her anymore.
She left nothing when she moved, and she really
never had anything while she was here. Being
outside on this balcony is the closest I can come
to feeling her since it seems we’re so far apart.
I lean back in my chair, pick up a pen, and be-
gin writing the lyrics to another song, with noth-
ing but her on my mind.
The cool air running through my hair
Nights like these, doesn’t seem fair
For you and I to be so far away
The stars all shimmer like a melody
Like they’re playing for you and me
But only I can hear their sounds.
I pick up my guitar and work through the first
few chords. I want these songs to be enough to
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convince her that we’re ready, so every single
thing has to be perfect. I’m just nervous that I’m
relying too much on Warren to help make it hap-
pen. I hope he’s more reliable in this situation
with Sydney than he is with his rent checks.