Sophie's question rocked me more than even the orgasm I'd just had. Me? Possibly a father? I stuttered, rolling of the mat. I went over to the refrigerator I had there, looking around inside for some of the bottled water that I had stashed. It was flat and stale, but it helped with my thirst as I thought.
I drained half the bottle before turning around, seeing Sophie sitting on the mattress with her knees pulled up to her chin, looking at me with her long purple hair hanging around her face like some sort of halo, her eyes filled with trepidation and fear. Even in my delay I'd hurt her, but I didn't know what to say. I never thought a child would be possible for someone like me. I'd dreamed of it, and I'd even told Sophie that before, but I wasn't sure that day would ever come.
Finally, I drained the rest of my bottle and grabbed another to bring over to her. I knelt down and took her hands, clasping them in mine. "Sophie, it's not that I don't want to have a baby with you some day. I do. I most certainly do, and there's nobody in the world that I think would be a better mother than you. But.... right now I'm not sure I'm worthy of such a gift. I'm still an evil man, regardless of how redeeming your love is. I've still got a tab with the devil to account for. I have to make amends. The idea of having that debt passing onto a baby..... why would I ever be worthy of your love or your child?"
"So is that no?" she asked quietly, tears forming in her eyes. My heart broke, and I felt tears form in my own.
"Not a no, my love. Just.... we have to take care of some things before we can bring a child into our situation."
Sophie nodded, a single tear falling to trickle down one perfect cheek. While I knew she truly wanted to help rid the city of these criminals with me, I could also see she yearned for a normal life, something I'd taken from her when I fell for her. We sat there, side by side, and when she leaned into me, I held her and rocked her as the afternoon turned into orange sunset.
* * *
Mark
"I've done some more investigation," Tabby said to us the next evening, as we met her for dinner at Guliano, one of the better Italian eateries in town that wasn't controlled by either the Confederation or Owen Lynch. Unfortunately, that meant it paid protection money to both organizations, and it showed in the decor. Guliano Dellacosta refused to let his food quality suffer though, and I thought his lasagna was to die for. "Our deputy mayor is bringing in some out of town talent."
"Oh really?" I asked, keeping my voice low. Guliano had seated us in a booth, but since I was supposed to be famous, it wasn't a private corner one. Instead, everyone in the restaurant could see where I, Sophie and Tabby were sitting. Ostensibly, Tabby was there as our business consultant. She had her MBA now, and the firm she worked for did do real estate investing and venture capital marketing. She'd even brought along some information on real companies in the area, ones that she was reasonably sure were clean if I actually did want to invest.
I had to give the perky redhead credit, she was smarter than she let on a lot of the time. Sophie had told me her ditzy ginger act was just that, an act, but it was easy to forget even after having her live with us for a few weeks after her rescue. "Any idea who or what?"
Tabby nodded, and slid over a file folder. The outside read Zen Nail Salon, and I was going to remind Tabby to use real names and not sets from Breaking Bad when I opened it and found that there was, in fact, a nail salon named Zen just outside the city. Behind the business information though, were two photographs that I slid out and looked over with Sophie. "They came in on an Aeroflot flight, but I don't know if that was because they are Russian or they just want to appear that way. I can't get into the Aeroflot data base, but a quick track of that flight number through their public information says the flight originated in Moscow before doing a stopover in Germany and then London before flying over here."
I nodded slowly and slid the photos back inside. "They're probably working for Lynch."
"Most likely. What are these guys if just two of them are supposed to unsettle the balance of power around here?"
I shook my head, and took another bite of my lasagna. "I'm not sure, but I have my suspicions."
Sophie, who had been quiet most of the day, took a sip of her red wine. I felt a twinge in my heart as I looked over at her. She was smiling and would talk when Tabby asked her something, but ever since our discussion the day before about having a baby, she'd been withdrawn. She wasn't brooding, but sad, which hurt even more because I knew I was the cause of her sadness. If there was a way I could take away the pain while still being honest, I would have. But I knew if I said yes just to please her, I'd not only poison our relationship, but I'd be bringing a child into a dangerous situation.