Lost in Distraction

Chapter Nine



I’ve spent a couple of days at Elle’s apartment being fed, watered and coddled over. I’m definitely starting to feel a lot better. She has been so much more relaxed since she told me about her past; we both have. I don’t have to be wary of my reactions anymore, and she isn’t tiptoeing around her past like it is a big secret. She told me that she has never wanted to pour her heart out to anyone like that before, but she wanted to be totally honest with me.

She continues to amaze me with her strength and resilience. Opening up to me like she did has simply made me fall more deeply in love with her, and I’m waiting for the right moment to tell her how I feel. There are lots of things I can’t tell her right now, but that is the one thing that I can control.

It’s been three days since the attack, and I’m almost feeling normal again—apart from my shoulder and ribs, of course. I’m itching to catch up with Shay so we can put our heads together and try and work out what the hell is really going on. We’ve been texting each other since the attack, but there hasn’t been the opportunity to talk about anything until now. Elle has a full day of classes today, so I made sure she was okay with Shay coming over while she was at school. Of course she thought it was fine, but I felt better asking her since it is her apartment.

After making sure I was set for the day, Elle leans down to kiss me goodbye. Never one to miss an opportunity, I grab her around the waist, pull her down on top of me and kiss the shit out of her. When we’ve had our fill I let her get up and watch her leave the apartment with the biggest smile on her face.

Shay lets himself in about twenty minutes later. As I walk back into the living room with two cups of coffee he curses, seeing the extent of my injuries for the first time.

“Shit, man. They really did a number on you,” he says, giving me the once over.

“Yeah, well you get that when it’s two on one and one gets you from the front while the other holds you back.” I laugh. “But I did get a couple of good shots in first.” We both laugh at that. Shay and I have been fighting together for years and we know it is always good to land at least a couple of punches in before getting your ass handed to you.

“So, what do you think about Evans being involved? His appearance has all but confirmed everything now,” Shay says, glancing at my face and wincing. It does look pretty horrendous. I’m amazed Elle has been so okay with it.

“I’m thinking either Gibbons or boss man is holding back on us, and Brimstone is getting poised to strike,” I think out loud.

Shay nods in agreement. “Yeah, but it still feels like we’re missing something.”

“I can’t put my finger on it either, bro. But when I do, we’ll be all over it,” I muse, knowing that I’ll do whatever it takes to keep Elle safe.



After a full day of classes, I can’t wait to get home. I’m exhausted and just want to get home to Brax and chill out. I walk in the door and I’m hit with the aroma of garlic and tomato. Looking towards the kitchen, I see Brax standing at the stove, shirtless and cooking dinner. Putting my laptop bag down on the kitchen counter, I wrap my arms around him from behind, being careful of his injured arm.

“Hello, gorgeous. How was your day?” he asks, turning around in my arms.

“It’s a lot better now I’m here with you,” I say as he kisses me, tugging at my bottom lip.

“Mmm hmm,” he hums, shifting his good hand to cup my face while he continues to plunge my mouth with his tongue. After what seems like an eternity we pull apart, grinning at each other.

“I’m glad to hear that,” he says. “Now you go have a long hot bath and by the time you’re finished, I’ll have dinner ready for us.” He kisses me again softly before tapping my butt as I turn to leave.

“It smells great by the way,” I state as I walk out of the room.

“You do too.”

I shut the bathroom door, a smile spreading across my face. Even after a long day at school, he still compliments me on how I smell.

I walk back into the kitchen after a long hot bath, wearing only a dressing gown. Brax looks me over and raises his eyebrow at me.

“If you insist on wearing that for dinner, we’ll never eat,” he says huskily, giving away the effect my near nakedness is having on him.

I giggle and give him a naughty grin. “Maybe that’s what I had in mind,” I reply with a wink.

He chokes on his beer, spluttering to catch his breath.

“I see,” he says, his voice dropping lower. “Well we better start eating before I lose my appetite for food.”

“And if I’m not hungry? For food, that is…”

“Elle, sit down and eat,” he growls.

We both sit down at the dining table and begin our meal. Just as Brax is finishing his second helping of lasagna, he looks over at me and catches me staring at him. I bite my lip, trying to quell the growing need that has me ready to forget about dinner completely.

“I’ve looked into what movies are on for us to watch tonight too. I want to say thank you for caring for me over the last few days. Although, I’m still waiting for the sexy nurse uniform,” he says, breaking the spell and making me laugh.

“Brax, I wanted to look after you. You were hurt, and I wanted to make you feel better,” I explain, hoping he hears the sincerity in my voice. He leans over the table and grabs my hand, stroking his thumb over my knuckles, knowing exactly what he is doing to me.

“And I’m eternally grateful for that, more than you could ever know. Maybe I could show you my gratitude in other ways?” he asks with a grin which tells me he has already thought of a few. I feel my cheeks get hot at his suggestion. Two can play this game.

“Maybe you could,” I reply, calling his bluff. His mouth drops open. I’ve surprised him with my inner vixen. Not waiting a minute longer, he stands and takes my hand as I lead him towards my bedroom.

Having told Brax all about my past, I’ve decided it is time to take things with him to the next level. We’ve been doing a lot of touching and kissing, like we’re horny teenagers who can’t get enough, but not once has he pressured me to take things further than I am ready for. I know he must be frustrated as all hell, because God knows I am! When I got home and saw that he had made dinner for me and then his sincerity when he thanked me for looking after him...well, the decision was set in stone.

Once we I reach the bed I turn to face him, looking up at his beautiful face.

“Are you sure about this?” he asks me, his eyes full of sincerity. I place my hands on his hips and inch closer to him.

“Very sure,” I reply as he moves his head down to kiss me. I curl my hands up around his back, moving our bodies as close as I can without hurting him. He gives a small laugh when we pull our lips apart.

“You’re not gonna hurt me, Elle. Don’t be scared.”

I grin back at him.

“I’m not scared of this. I’ve never been more sure about anything in my whole life.”

The look of adoration on his face melts my heart. He gently traces his hand down my body, skimming my side before moving to loosen the tie of my robe. My breathing picks up as he pulls the tie in one swift move, leaving the robe to fall open, baring my naked body beneath. He looks down at me and back up to in my eyes.

“Beautiful,” he whispers as his hand slowly delves inside the robe, fingers gently dragging against my skin, like he’s marking me.

He eases one side of the robe slowly over one shoulder and then the other until it pools at my feet. I’m now standing in front of him, completely naked, trembling with anticipation.

I go to help him with his clothes, but he shakes his head at me.

“Not yet, babe. This is all about you,” he says quietly as he moves to the skin behind my ear and gently kisses my neck, slowly moving down the line of my jaw until he reaches my mouth, dragging his tongue gently across my lips, encouraging them to open. As soon as I do, he pulls me in tight against his body and runs his fingers through my hair, gripping it as he kisses me with fervor. I move myself back onto the bed and lie down in front of him, lifting my arms above my head in a gesture of submission, showing him I’m ready.

The sexiest groan I’ve ever heard escapes his mouth as he kneels on the bed beside me. He lightly runs his fingers up my leg, caressing my skin as he makes his way up my body, leaving a line of fire under his touch and I arch my back when his hand reaches my breast. Lying down beside me, he stares into my eyes and resumes his exploration of my body, bringing his mouth down to my skin to join his hand in his ministrations.

I can’t hide my love for this man any longer. As he continues to worship my body, I move my mouth to whisper in his ear. “I love you, Brax.”

He stills, pulling back his head to look down at me with those gorgeous blue eyes of his.

“Oh, Elle. I love you more than you could ever know. Now I want to show you.”

I gasp as he moves his hand deeper between my legs, his palm rubbing against me as he claims my mouth.



The moment Elle says she loves me, my heart explodes. I have known for a while now that I was head over heels for her, but I didn’t want to freak her out by telling her too quickly. She’s come so far and I didn’t want her retreating back into her shell. I’ve never been in love like this before and I wanted to be sure that we were in the right place before telling her.

My mouth is unrelenting as I move down her body, kissing and tasting every inch I can see. I curse the fact I can’t use both of my hands. I wish I could use my whole body to show her my love and having the sling between us is frustrating as hell. I position myself between her legs, alternating between touching and tasting her, I can’t get enough of this. When she finally lets herself go, she falls apart against my mouth.

I honestly can’t think of a better moment in my entire life.

After catching her breath, she gets up and kneels beside me, pushing my good shoulder back onto the bed and forcing me to lie down while her hands move to my belt. She gasps as she sees my obvious desire for her straining against my jeans. Carefully, she inches my pants and boxers down until they join her robe on the floor.

Moving back up the bed, she straddles my thighs as she moves to my centre, proceeding to return the favor I’d bestowed on her just moments before, using her hands and mouth to drive me crazy. I feel myself getting close as she pulls away and moves higher up my body before raising her hips above mine, leaning forward to whisper against my lips, “I love you Brax,” before pushing down and taking all of my length inside her. Those three words break the last ounce of control I am clinging to as she continues to kiss and explore and taste me. She lifts her hips at an achingly slow pace, grinding against me, forcing a groan to escape my throat with every thrust.

She feels exquisite. I’ve never been with anybody that has felt as good as Elle right now. Our bodies move together as we try to get as close as two people can get. I hold my hand on her hip as she continues to move against me, quietly moaning at the sensation. I start bucking up with her, forcing myself deeper. I can feel her tighten around me as she approaches the edge of the cliff. I prop myself up with my good arm, lifting my shoulders off the bed and forcing us both deeper still, kissing my way along her collar bone, towards her neck. Right now I don’t care about the pain in my shoulder and ribs. Being this close to her is worth all the pain in the world.

She increases her tempo, telling me she is getting close. Turning her head towards mine, she whispers against my lips, "Come with me,” just as I feel the pulsations start to surround me. That’s all it takes for me to follow her over, shouting out her name as I hold our bodies together. We’re both breathing deeply as we come down from our mutual high. In that moment, I realize that I may be in over my head, but know that I don’t ever want to be anywhere else.



2 months later



It’s been four months since I started this job and came into Elle’s life. Four months since I saw her photo and knew I had to have her.

It may have started off as a job, just another assignment from the big boss, but after being with her for the last four months the only thing I would change is not having to live a lie. It’s my daily torment. I’ve talked with Shay about how I feel about her and how its tearing me up inside having to deceive her but every time, after weighing up what I have to lose by telling her the truth, I always talk myself out of confessing everything to her. I hold on to the hope that she will understand why I have to lie to her and will continue loving me regardless. She has put so much trust in me and has been so honest. I swear my heart breaks a little more each day, knowing the depths of my deception.

Will she understand that I love her, despite the fact I was being paid to watch over her?

Will she believe in my love for her and forgive me?

It’s the weekend after Thanksgiving and we’re relaxing after a busy day of studying. I’m laying on the couch with Elle on top of me while we watch a movie. I feel her whole body jolt against mine, so I turn my head towards her, seeing those beautiful green eyes looking back at me.

‘Babe, do you like being here with me?” she asks.

“Sweetheart, what kind of question is that? I love being here with you, always,” I say with a smile, lifting my hands up to gently rub her shoulders. She groans in delight as I press my fingers in big sweeping circles. Must remember that for later tonight.

“I’m glad because I was thinking today about how you spend most of your time here now…” she pauses, looking over at me to gauge my reaction.

“Elle, if you want some space you just have to tell me, darlin,” I say.

“No! No, Brax, it’s not that. I definitely don’t want space from you,” she says, quietly panicking. “I was wondering if you wanted to move in with me….here?”

I stop breathing. I literally stop f*cking breathing. It’s like the whole world is standing still, and I’m the only one moving. I reach over and pull her towards me, into my lap.

“Baby, I would love nothing more to move in with you, to take you to bed every night and wake up next to your beautiful face every morning. Knowing I would be coming home to you would be the highlight of my day, my month, my year. I’d love to move in with you. Hell, I’d do it right now if I could,” I say with a smile. I cup her face with my hands and slowly start kissing her, savoring this significant moment between us.

I’m choosing to ignore the nagging doubt at the back of my mind. It’s like the devil on my shoulder, telling me to enjoy this moment because it’ll all come crashing down around me soon.

“You’ve made me so happy again, Brax,” she murmurs against my neck as she burrows into my chest.

“That is my only purpose in life now, darlin’. Making you as happy as you’ve made me,” I say, tightening my grip around her.

This moment is bitter sweet. Knowing that I’m the one giving her a level of security she hasn’t experienced since her family’s deaths is phenomenal. The level of trust she has given me is tremendous and I feel like I am deceiving her by living a lie, but she is better not knowing the truth. There are family secrets that I’m not sure she would ever be able to handle, things that would shatter her memories of her family forever.

Deep down I’m hoping that this job will end and I will be able to stay here with her, protecting her so that she never has to find out the truth. I’m so grateful to have her in my life.

If only I could guarantee that she’ll stay there.