I wouldn’t look Human or Fae in this form. I wanted to see myself through Ryder’s eyes, but didn’t have the luxury of looking as another Mage moved towards us, unaware that I could see them now.
I waited until he was close enough before I brought the sword in my right hand up and spun with enough force to remove his head from his shoulders. The other Mages watched the detached head as it rolled over to where they stood. I knew she wasn’t supposed to interfere, but I was damn glad she was standing beside me, giving me strength and calling out warnings and encouragement as I did the damage. She couldn’t wield the weapons herself, but I could feel her giving me her strength to go on the attack.
“Game on, bitches,” I growled as Danu moved in sync with me step for step, and I made short work of the Mages that were left. Either this was a different group or the Mages didn’t have word back from what had occurred at the coronation. Or maybe their communication skills sucked. You’d have thought they would have put a little more effort into getting me, but they’d sent only a handful of Mages, and that came with being cocky. It was a slap to my confidence, but I was glad for it considering I was huge with the babes.
As the last Mage fell, Danu moved several of the crystals and brought down the ward that had kept me contained to the small area. For a moment I felt panic, because I knew I’d have to face the music. The moment I turned to face Ryder, I regretted it.
His eyes spoke volumes, and I could see his anger burning in the endless black pits of them. I opened my mouth to say something, but closed it when Danu sifted out without a single word. I wanted to scream at her to come back, but this was my fight and we both knew it.
I looked for Adam and Darynda; they were up, both staring at me, as were most of the people who stood in the small crowd that Ryder had brought with him. I shed the power like a second skin and turned back to face Ryder.
“Ryder, I can explain,” I whispered.
“Zahruk, take Synthia to my rooms and do not leave her alone,” Ryder growled. “I’ll be there shortly to deal with her.”
I paused as my heart sank to my stomach.
I didn’t wait for Zahruk to lead the way. Instead, I marched out of the room and made my way to Ryder’s chambers. I could explain this to him if he’d give me half a chance. He had to be willing to give me that chance though, and I wasn’t sure my heart could take the waiting.
Zahruk’s silence was deafening as he stood in the doorway of the giant bedroom. He had to have been on the same mental path Ryder and I had been using; his eyes wouldn’t meet mine. I got it. This was a big secret, and yes, I’d have told them eventually, but on my terms. I had barely wrapped my own head around it; how was I supposed to get them to understand it?
The idea of Ryder discarding me because I’d been crafted to be his perfect mate was something I hadn’t been willing to deal with yet. It felt like forever before Ryder finally walked into the room.
He dismissed Z, who glared once before he left, as Ryder walked over to where I’d chosen to stand beside the window. “You lied to me,” he snapped angrily. “You kept this from me and I’d like to know why.”
“I didn’t lie, Ryder, I withheld the truth,” I whispered. “I’m half-Fae, and can’t lie just like you.”
“You knew this, and yet you didn’t tell me. Omission. It’s the same thing as lying, Synthia. How long have you known you were the daughter of a fucking Goddess?”
“I’ve known she was my mother for a little over a month now, so to answer your question, not very long,” I replied, meeting his angry eyes.
“And you just thought you’d keep it from me?” he demanded.
“I didn’t want to, but I’ve learned things that I’m not sure how to talk about with you,” I replied honestly. My heart was beating wildly as my walls came down around me. It felt as if I’d had the carpet pulled from beneath me.
“Like what? What couldn’t you fucking tell me?” He folded his arms across his chest angrily and as I tried to lay my hand on his arm, he jerked away from my touch.
A single tear slid down my cheek. Here it was; it was going to all change, and I’d lose him forever. “Danu replaced one of Madisyn’s eggs with her own. She created me, for you.”
“Impossible,” he whispered. Ryder whispering was deadly.
“It’s not impossible for a Goddess, Ryder,” I said as I turned to look away from him to stare out the window. “She was there with us at your crowning, helping me to fight off the Mages who helped Faolán. She had been after me to accept her, and I hadn’t. I had been holding back from doing it. When Ristan was hurt, and I thought he was dead, I accepted her. She told me things the next day, things that could never be unheard.”