He exhaled heavily.
“I'll let you run and hide for now, but only for a little while.”
He leaned in and kissed me tenderly, creating a familiar heat in my middle. This time I had the sense to keep my hands to myself. Barely.
When he pulled away, I almost followed him.
“Don't make me wait too long,” he said.
He touched me one last time then went inside.
Seven
After ten hours of restless sleep, I once again woke sweaty. Only this time, I was irritable, too. How many times did I need to hurt Oanen to prove to myself I wasn't good for him? I had no answer. Not even after breakfast or a long shower or a marathon of science fiction shows.
Frustrated, I wandered to the kitchen. A knock on the back door interrupted my mindless staring contest with the inside of the fridge. I looked up and saw a familiar face that lifted my mood a bit. At least, enough to answer the door without a scowl.
“Hey, Fenris. Sorry about last night.”
“No need to apologize. I was just wondering if you might want some company today?”
I stepped aside to let him in.
“Running from your her-herd again?”
He grinned.
“So what have you been up to? Other than last night, I haven’t seen you all week,” I said.
“Nothing special. Sessions and pack stuff. Aubrey’s actions led to a pack-wide inquisition.”
“Spanish style?” I closed the door behind him and went back to the fridge.
“No. No jailing or torture, other than Aubrey.”
“Yeah, what happened to her?”
“She was moved to another pack where she’s being kept in isolation, only speaking with that pack leader. It’s like a retraining program.” He grew quiet behind me. “So what are you hoping to find in there?”
“Some miracle food that will solve all my problems. Know of any?”
He chuckled. “Nope. But, I hear talking about problems helps. I have good ears.”
“And teeth and eyes, I bet.”
“Only for girls who like to wear red.”
I closed the fridge door and rolled my eyes at him.
“Seriously, tell me what’s going on,” he said kindly.
“I hate not knowing what I really am or what I’m capable of. Sure, I’m a fury. But, what the hell’s a fury? My mom could have at least given me some kind of heads-up before she took off. If I’d known something, anything, about myself maybe I wouldn’t be so freaked out.”
“Why are you freaked out?”
“I’ve burned Oanen twice now without meaning to, and my eyes are starting to glow when I’m angry or…well, never mind. No matter what, burning people can’t be good.”
“Is Oanen mad that you burned him?”
I snorted.
“No. He keeps telling me it’s no big deal. I don’t know what needs to happen for him to realize how dangerous I might be. Death by fire? He’s insane for not seeing the risk.”
Fenris studied me for a long moment before he wrapped me in a slow, comforting hug. I rested my head on his shoulder and released a long breath. I hadn’t realized how much I’d needed a sympathetic hug until he gave it.
“Oanen’s not insane,” Fenris said quietly. “I don’t think there’s a guy alive who wouldn’t suffer anything for the right girl.”
“That’s what I’m afraid of.”
“I don’t think you need to be. I’m touching you, and I’m just fine. You feel warm, but not hot enough to burn me. You’ll learn control with Oanen, too.”
I pulled back, and he released me, his gaze filled with compassion.
“Thank you.”
“Any time. Now, how about we start making some dinner, and you tell me what else is bothering you?”
“Why do you think there’s something else?”
“Because you said problems. Plural. So, spill it.”
“You just want me to feed you.”
He covered his heart with a hand and pretended to be wounded. Grinning, I opened the fridge again and pulled out what we’d need to make burgers.
“You’re right. It’s not just worrying about what might happen to Oanen. Uttira’s getting to me. I can’t stand the way the people here treat the humans.”
I handed Fenris a tomato to slice and started forming patties.
“Maybe that’s because you still see yourself as human,” Fenris said.
“You’re partly right. I know I’m different from them, but I don’t feel like a completely different species. And I don’t see how any other creature can view humans as so different when we all look like them. Why do we think our differences make us superior?”
“That’s a good question.”
I let the pan heat before putting two burgers in.
“See, that’s what I’m talking about. There’s no valid reason. The humans are treated the way they are because they’ve always been treated like that. You saw what happened to Zoe. If you had a younger sister, would you want some guy creeping on her?”
“No.”
“Did you notice how I didn’t say the species creeping on your pretend sister? You know why? Because I knew it wouldn’t matter. No one wants to be treated like that.”
“So what are you going to do about it?” he asked, taking two plates out of the cupboard.
“Uttira’s attitude toward humans starts with the Council. Rules need to change in order to change perceptions.”
“What rules?”
“The one where humans have to willingly be bait for all the creatures in Uttira. While I understand that the creatures here need to learn, it doesn’t need to occur in a way that’s threatening to the humans. Why not have them go to the Academy with the rest of us? They’d be in a more protected environment there. Ashlyn feels so segregated and fearful of her safety, she doesn’t leave her house. And the Council encourages that behavior by having everything she needs delivered to her. Ashlyn should be able to run to the store if she wants, without worrying about someone trying to eat her.”
I slid the two patties on the buns Fenris had waiting, and he carried the plates to the table. While we ate, I vented and he listened. He didn’t agree or disagree with anything, just listened. When we finished, he helped me with the dishes.
“Thank you for listening,” I said. “You’re right. I do feel a little better.”
He put the plate away and gave me his usual boyish grin.
“Any time. Just keep feeding me.”
I hugged him, grateful to have a friend, and it made me realize just how much I missed having Eliana around. I needed to call her today and—
The door opened behind me. I pulled back from Fenris and turned to see who’d come in.
Oanen stood just inside the kitchen. Shock briefly showed on his face before all expression vanished. The only tell at what he felt was his hard, twitching jaw muscle.
Before I could say anything, he turned around and walked out. I ran after him, reaching the porch as wings started to unfurl from his back.
“Don’t you dare take off without listening to an explanation,” I said.
The wings folded and absorbed back into his skin. He didn’t turn to face me, though. Instead, I stared at his amazingly naked backside.
“I think what I saw was explanation enough.”
“What you saw was a hug between two friends.”
The front door opened and closed. I knew Oanen heard it, too, because he fisted his hands. I stepped off the porch, grateful that Fenris had left and given me the privacy I needed to talk to Oanen.
“Right. Friends.”
“Friends, Oanen. Use your damn ears. Does Fenris make my heart race? Does he make me hot enough to burn him? No.”
His hands remained fisted, fueling my already smoldering temper. I stalked forward until I stood just behind him.
“Given my disposition to most people, I know it’s hard to believe that I might actually crave friendship. But I do. Finding someone who doesn’t annoy the piss out of me is unbelievably rare. And, that’s exactly why I need to keep the ones I have, no matter what the gender. Your jealousy isn’t cute. It’s infuriating. Either trust me or fly away.”
He bowed his head for a moment then turned.
“Seeing you in someone else’s arms hurt more than any burn you could ever give me.”