chapter Seventeen
I stood there stunned. Then, with a surge of venomous rage, I went after him. I caught up to Kale in the hall and, without a second thought, slapped him with a psi ball heavy enough to take him down.
Kale lay on the floor in the hall, staring up at me with a combination of surprise and amusement. I stood over him, hands on fire with the power rippling through me.
“No f*cking way. You don’t get to pull the dramatic exit. I’m sick of you vampires and your dramatic friggin exits.” My voice rose, and several light bulbs in the hall exploded in a shower of glass. “You can clean up the mess you helped me make. I get to make the unnecessarily over-the-top exit. Got it?”
I didn’t wait for a reply. Instead, I stormed out the back door, ignoring those who surfaced to see who was making all the noise. I kicked the door open and raged through the parking lot. I was spoiling for a good fight. What I most needed was a good kill of the supernatural kind.
A basic vampire kill would do little to ease my appetite for violence. I wanted Lilah, but rushing back to her simply because Kale had pissed me off would be stupid. I needed to do a little planning first. So, I went to the next best place where I could let off a little steam and get my head together, a dance club down the street from The Wicked Kiss. With the bloodlust appeased, I was free to walk among the heavily packed human bodies and enjoy the energy that a crowd hopped up on booze and music gave off in abundance.
I wasn’t yet ready to join my vampire brethren in drowning my sorrows in blood baths and mayhem, so letting loose human style was just fine with me. I told the bartender to keep the whiskey coming until my vision swam. Then, I slipped onto the dance floor and remembered what being human felt like.
The steady beats kept coming as the DJ successfully packed the dance floor with writhing bodies. A few guys approached me, seeking someone to take home. I merely smiled and shook my head before dancing away. They didn’t know it, but I was the last woman in the building they wanted to go home with.
Music is a force as powerful as any other that goes unseen. Like love or the exhilarating sensation of leaping from a plane, it was one of those entities that might exist outside of you, but their real power was born from within. Though trendy dance beats weren’t my general cup of musical tea, that night they set me free.
After an especially wild song ended, I slid onto a bar stool and signaled the bartender for another shot.
“You started without me,” came a voice to my left. Willow clinked his beer bottle against my shot glass in cheers. “How the hell can you dance in those things with a bottle of whiskey in your veins?”
I followed his gaze to my heeled boots and laughed. “It’s a talent possessed only by women—and some gay men.”
“You look happy out there, being one of them.” He nodded toward the dance floor. “Do you miss it?”
I watched the people dancing the night away, each one of them here to leave something behind as they did so. Being human didn’t make one void of trouble or pain. If anything, it made those things worse.
“Yeah, I do. Mostly, I miss the ignorance, not knowing how bad things really are. I miss that.”
Willow wore a sour expression. “I know what you mean. Seeing the dark from the inside is a f*cking ugly experience.”
“Why do you always show up when I’m miserable?” I asked, sucking on a lime wedge from the nearby dish.
Willow shrugged and drained the beer bottle dry. “Just lucky, I guess.”
He ordered a round of tequila shots, his favorite. I curled a lip in disgust; the drink didn’t agree with me.
“Did you come to talk me down? I didn’t think I tapped enough power tonight to draw attention.”
“You didn’t.” Sliding a tequila shot in front of me, he flashed a lopsided grin. “I dropped in at your club to talk about last night. You weren’t there, but a couple of bodies were along with one hell of an angry vampire. I thought you could use some drunken shenanigans.”
“Shenanigans,” I repeated. “Funny word coming from an angel. What did you have in mind?”
He continued to nudge the tequila shot a little closer until it was bumping my hand. “We could start a bar fight. Or, steal a car off the Ferrari lot. Maybe even try some illicit narcotics and spend the rest of the night staring at our hands.”
“Sounds like you’ve been watching a few too many teen party movies,” I laughed, giving in and taking the stomach turning shot. “That crap will rot your brain.”
“Good. I got you laughing. Now, tell me what’s bothering you.”
The alcohol-induced happiness dulled. Willow was easy to talk to. Telling him the horrible things I’ve done, confessing my dirty little secrets, I never felt judged. With him, I was able to share feelings no words could fully describe. He seemed to understand, always offering words of wisdom from a place beyond my reach. He was a genuine friend, and I didn’t have many of those these days. Of course, the fact that our relationship was platonic helped. It allowed me a sense of liberty. I was able to expose my soul to him without fear.
I swirled my whiskey but pushed away the next tequila shot Willow placed in front of me. I considered the deep golden liquid in my glass, imagining it as red and warm, straight from the vein. Muttering obscenities under my breath, I drank down the liquor, finding it to be a poor substitute.
“I’m a wolf with no pack, a twin flame divided from my other half and a Hound who is one of the very things I’m supposed to kill.” I slapped a few bills down for the bartender and smiled bitterly at Willow. “How much time do you have?”
“I’ve got all the time in the world. By all means, talk away.”
“I’d rather not. I don’t even want to think about it.” With a teasing scowl, I grabbed the drink he continued to push closer and swallowed it with a grimace. “You know, for an angel, you’re a terrible influence.”
Willow snickered. His eyes shone with delight. “What can I say? I’m a rebel. So are you. That’s why both monster and man wants to either control or kill you. It’s a good thing.”
I rolled my eyes but took his words to heart. “Oh yeah, it’s fantastic.”
“Seriously, Alexa, when the bad guys consider you a problem, it means you’re doing something right. Even if at times you’re one of them.” Willow plucked a lime wedge from the dish and bit into the tart fruit.
I shook my head and snorted with derision. “What am I really though? Wolf, human, vampire? I don’t fit in anywhere anymore.”
“You’re a Hound of God and the light half of a twin flame union. Those are good things. You exist to fight evil. Bottom line.”
“Until I become it,” I said with a frown. “Lilah said the twin flame bond is a curse. The worst part is that even though I know she’s a liar, I agreed with her reasons why.”
Willow appeared thoughtful. Even as he downed drink after drink, he was barely drunk. I would have been on the floor after that many.
“Remember, she’s the dark half of her union. Your roles are not the same. There’s good and there’s evil. And, some creatures walk in both worlds. There is something powerful in being able to experience both the light and the dark. But ultimately, even you must choose a side.”
He delivered that heavy verbal blow by crashing his glass against mine in cheers. My drink splashed over the edge, spilling a few drops in my lap. He received my dirty look with a smile and shoved another shot of tequila in front of me.
His words reverberated in my ears as I mulled them over. Willow was wise. He had a way of breaking things down so they were clear where before they had been confused.
“Stop making me think. I’m trying to drink away my sorrows here.” I tossed a lime wedge at him, laughing when it struck him square on the chin. The newest Christina Aguilera song pounded out of the speakers, and I perked up. “I love this song. Come dance with me.”
I jumped off the stool. Dancing the night away with whiskey in my blood and sweaty humans at my side likely wasn’t the best way to spend my night, but I needed a break from reality. Jez’s Vegas vacation idea looked better all the time. Since I couldn’t skip town tonight with Lilah killing my wolves, dancing would have to do.
“Trust me. You don’t want to see me dance. My talents are better spent right here.” Willow waved me off, dismissing me when the bartender placed another half dozen shots in front of him.
I gravitated to the dance floor, watching as a tall redhead moved in on Willow within seconds of my absence. It didn’t surprise me; he was a looker.
A pleasant warmth spread through my limbs from the alcohol. It was such a predictably human way of numbing out. The more I thought about it, the more aware I became of the pounding heartbeats all around me. So much blood to spill. A kill like that could create a high that would last for days. I licked my lips and reminded myself I was here to unwind, to leave that world behind. I never could though; I carried the darkness with me always.
I suddenly wasn’t feeling so hot. Flushed with overwhelming heat, the bloodlust sprang forth. No way, I’d fed that hunger already.
I pushed through the crowd, seeking escape from the crush of lively human bodies. Every breath I took overwhelmed me with their heady aroma. I had to get out.
“I have to go before I slaughter these people,” I said, grabbing Willow’s arm. The redhead glared darkly and sauntered away. Willow took one look at my panic-stricken face and got to his feet.
The outside air was thankfully free of any strong human scent, overwhelmed by car exhaust and the faint aroma of summer rain in the distance. We stopped at a bench half a block away. I didn’t sit down. Instead, I paced back and forth in front of it, feeling uncomfortable inside my own skin. My wolf was restless.
That was another area of concern. Veryl’s files made it sound like the wolf was lost upon transformation to vampire. Kale said it was still there, trapped inside. I wasn’t sure which was worse, losing my wolf or having it caged within me. They both sounded like a form of hell.
Emotion surged, and I kicked a pop can in misplaced anger. It only served to infuriate me further.
“Think you can keep your shit together?” Willow lounged on the bench, regarding me with casual curiosity.
“I don’t know what happened in there. It came over me so fast. I feel a little better now.” Scowling at the pop can, I picked it up and tossed it in a nearby trashcan. “It could be Arys. Sometimes, we can feel each other without trying to. It can be disorienting.”
“Makes sense. How did that all go anyway?”
I watched a couple across the street walking hand in hand. They leaned into one another, talking animatedly. I envied them.
“Not so good. I told Arys I need some time apart. Things have been kind of strained between us lately. I don’t know where I end and he begins; it’s driving me crazy.”
I dug through my shoulder bag, seeking normalcy in going through the motions of using lip balm and checking my cell phone. I almost didn’t notice the weird look Willow gave me.
“It will drive you crazy,” he said. “Being apart. You’re not meant to be apart, not now that you’ve found each other.”
I groaned and sat heavily next to him on the bench. “Don’t tell me that.”
“Sorry to break it to you, but you can’t exist without him. You’re not meant to.”
“Maybe Lilah’s right. It does sound like a curse.”
Willow harrumphed and flicked my arm hard. “Don’t make me slap that attitude out of you. Do you have any idea how many lonely people would give anything to be bound to another? To share something so sacred despite the hardship that accompanies it. I’ve seen the depths of sorrow-filled loneliness. If anything is a curse, it’s that.”
I rubbed my arm, feeling deservedly rebuked. “I know. I sound like a spoiled a*shole. I wish I hadn’t said that. I’m just confused. I don’t know what purpose Arys and I share, and I’m afraid we’ll destroy each other before we figure it out.”
We sat there in quiet contemplation, watching the downtown traffic whiz by. In the distance, I heard sirens. A drunken whoop echoed from outside the club we’d just left. Typical sounds of the city engulfed us.
“Have a little faith, Alexa. These things tend to reveal themselves when the time is right. It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it.”
“Yeah, I’m sure you’re right.” I nodded, thinking about Arys. I hated myself for telling him I couldn’t handle it. He had waited so long for me. Bailing out when things got tough was cowardice. I was stronger than that.
Noticing the shift in my mood, Willow nudged me playfully. “Ready to get back in there and drink ourselves into total stupidity? I might even get on the dance floor.”
No sooner had the words left him than two black Escalades screeched to a stop at the curb in front of us. Several FPA agents spilled out like clowns tumbling from a polka-dotted coupe. Many of them pointed what appeared to be tranquilizer guns at me. Agent Thomas Briggs stepped out looking like a man with an agenda. I wasn’t going to like whatever happened next.
Briggs sauntered up flashing the gun at his hip. He held his badge ready like some TV cop. A tensor bandage was visible beneath his jacket sleeve. It wasn’t a cast though, so I must not have hurt his arm as badly as I’d hoped.
I stood up to face him, and all of the agents braced to fire their weapons. I held my hands up in a show of peace yet tapped my power. Being human, they couldn’t see the crackle and color of the energy. Only a human with a strong sixth sense would even feel it.
“Briggs,” I nodded curtly. “Are you tailing me?”
“I’m government, O’Brien. I tracked the GPS in your phone.” His steely gaze was unwavering, his stride purposeful. “We need to talk.”
“What do you want, Agent? Cut to the chase.” I crossed my arms, doing my best to appear unaffected with so many guns trained on me. It would take only seconds for a tranquilizer to take me down.
Willow rose slowly, standing ready beside me. If Briggs didn’t somehow know what he was, I’d like to ensure that it stayed that way. A few of the guns switched from me to him. I wondered briefly if a tranquilizer would have any effect on an immortal.
“I have a few questions for you. Bit of a delicate nature. I’m sure you understand.” Briggs studied Willow closely, sizing him up. We all knew how deceiving looks could be.
“And, if I refuse?” I challenged. I needed to know how far Briggs planned to take this.
“You’re the madam of a vampire whorehouse. That alone is reason enough for me to bring you in. You have ties to the headless body we found. You came uninvited into my facility. Your boyfriend roughed up one of my agents. Not to mention, you’re already on our watch list. Do I need to go on?”
So, Arys had followed through with his intent to beat some info out of Bianca. Couldn’t say I was sorry I missed it, though I was curious what, if anything, he’d gotten out of her.
Briggs had too much on me; I didn’t see a way to get out of this chat.
“I’m not going back to that building,” I said, visions of the FPA basement danced in my head. I hated that place. “We can talk in public. Right here.”
“Let’s take a drive.” Briggs nodded toward the trucks. “Alone.”
“By that, I assume you mean me alone and you surrounded by gun-toting morons.” I glanced around at the agents flanking Briggs. They were mostly men, just a few women. Juliet was not among them.
“You assume correctly, though, I promise you, I don’t work with morons.” Briggs was patient, awaiting my decision.
I looked to Willow, finding him characteristically calm and cool. I focused on opening my thoughts to him. It was best for him to leave me with Briggs. I could handle it. Willow shouldn’t be subjected to the FPA simply because he liked to get loaded in my company.
‘Just go, but walk away. Don’t let them see you poof. Check on Jez, if you don’t mind. Make sure she’s safe.’ I pushed the thought to him, hoping it worked. Aloud I said, “I’m going to take a ride with Briggs. If you don’t hear from me within an hour, tell Arys where I went.”
The mention of Arys was more for Briggs’s benefit than mine. I didn’t want Arys to come riding to my so-called rescue, but if Briggs thought he might, this conversation would go a lot smoother.
Willow made a show of checking the time on his phone. “Ok, one hour. Talk to you soon.”
He stood there with arms crossed, giving Briggs a guarded but invasive stare. He watched as I got into a vehicle with agents on every side of me. I managed to flash him a wave and an eye-roll before the doors closed and we pulled into traffic.
Right away, I had four guns in my face. Squeezed onto the seat between a male and female agent, I glowered at Briggs who turned in the front passenger seat to look at me.
“Alright, Briggs. You got your way,” I said, holding the wolf back. “Now, get those things out of my face and treat me with some respect. I’m not asking.”
“Is that a threat?” He asked, wary and stern.
“Does it have to be? If I wanted to taste that rich, arrogant blood, I would have done it last time we spoke.” I raised a brow and smirked. We all knew I was the monster here; if they forced me to act like it, I would.
Briggs regarded me with thinly veiled distaste. The feeling was mutual. After a minute, he waved a hand, and the agents withdrew their guns. I didn’t move a muscle, just beamed a sickly sweet smile at him.
“So, where’s Juliet?” I inquired expectantly. “Let me guess. She doesn’t know about this little meeting. Just like she didn’t know about the people you’re holding hostage in the basement of that scary ass hospital.”
“She took the night off. And, you don’t know jack shit about those people.”
“I know what I saw. Is that where you’d like to see me, Briggs? Locked in a cold little stone room, never again to see the light of day?”
A muscle twitched in his jaw. “It does have its appeal. However, I think you underestimate the respect I have for you, O’Brien. I knew your parents; I worked with them. I assure you, I have no ill intentions toward you.”
The driver guided the vehicle through the busy downtown core. The second Escalade followed, shadowing every turn and lane change. I wasn’t sure how to take advantage of the opportunity I faced.
“I’m aware of my parents’ involvement with you. I know you expected me to grow up to be a good little agent like my sister. Sorry about that.” I settled in against the seat. There was no telling how long this would take, so I might as well get comfortable.
“I’ll be honest,” Briggs nodded, tugging at his seat belt so he could turn more in his seat. “We’d hoped you would join the FPA, but we can’t force you. Although, we would certainly still be interested in working with you.”
He let that hang between us. I considered the many ways I could respond. My instant reaction was to tell him to shove it up his ass. Anger didn’t make wise choices though.
“If this is about Shya, you can save your breath. I told you already, I don’t know shit about his plans. I kill for him to keep a secret. That’s all.”
“A secret? Meaning the supernatural activity in this city?” Briggs’s dark eyes searched me. He was keenly observant, taking note of my every blink and breath.
“That’s right. I kill other supernaturals, the idiots that don’t know how to keep a low profile. There’s no more or less to it.”
“To avoid public exposure.”
“Obviously.” I knew he was trying to figure out how that could benefit Shya. I would certainly never tell Briggs about Shya’s belief that keeping the public in the dark about us gave us more power over them and kept us safe. It was a belief I shared.
“Sure, that’s your story,” he replied with skepticism. “We both know there’s more to it. You’re one of several unique, powerful types in Shya’s arsenal. I’m sure he doesn’t need that kind of power to police the idiots. But, who am I to say?”
I was growing increasingly uncomfortable. Somehow, I managed to sit still, giving Briggs a disaffected stare.
“Come on, Briggs. This can’t be why you tracked my phone and hauled my ass in here,” I said, trying to steer the conversation in a new direction. “What do you want?”
He appeared pensive, choosing his words. “I want you to replace Veryl Armstrong as our informant.”
I wasn’t sure what to think of that. Laughter was my initial reaction. Briggs glowered at me, waiting for me to get it out of my system.
“Now, why the hell would I want to do that?” I asked, sobering quickly.
“Well for one, it would make me a whole lot more likely to turn a blind eye toward your dirty little whorehouse and what goes on inside.” Raising a dark brow, Briggs pinned me with an arrogant sneer. “Besides, it seems only fitting, seeing as you’re the one who killed him.”
My lips twitched into a hint of a smirk. Briggs really thought he knew it all. I still wasn’t sure how I felt about killing Veryl. He had hidden so much from me. I still felt the bitter sting of betrayal. Yet, as I continued to uncover pieces of the puzzle, it became clear that there was more to Veryl’s actions than I’d first thought. I was starting to think he might have been trying to protect me all along.
“I sure did. I had my reasons. When it becomes illegal to kill a vampire, maybe I’ll share them with you. You might want to try something else. That tactic isn’t going to work.”
“I’m trying to protect this city, O’Brien. It would be nice if you’d like to do the same. Then, we could come to some kind of agreement.” Briggs spread his hands as if trying to appeal to my common sense. “I’m not your enemy. I have a job to do. For this city, this country. The world even. Supernatural shit isn’t contained by borders. You know that. You have an opportunity to play an important role here.”
“So, what are you saying? If I don’t I’ll be labelled some kind of supernatural terrorist threat? I bet you have some swanky government term for that. I’m not your enemy either, Agent. But, I have no interest in working for you.”
“Then work with us.” Briggs leaned forward, his voice rising in volume. “Look, Alexa, I have information on Shya. I think you have some, too. If you’re not on the inside with him, then I think it’s safe to assume you and I want the same things as far as he’s concerned.”
“And, what might that be?” My curiosity was piqued. If Briggs knew something about Shya that I didn’t, I wanted to know what it was.
“To stop him from tearing innocent lives apart. Freedom from the wait. Never knowing what he’s up to, but always knowing whatever it is, it’s gonna be big and f*cking bad.” Anger flickered through his eyes, and he clenched his fists. “Do you share that burden, or am I alone in that?”
I met his gaze steadily, repressing the flicker of hope that leapt in my chest. Could it be possible that I could trust the FPA regarding Shya? It seemed too good to be true. It would be so damn nice to have someone on the outside who understood how dangerous the demon was.
“Yeah,” I admitted. “I share that burden. More so these days than ever before.”
I glanced out the tinted window, watching the buildings pass by. I disliked Briggs immensely. He was near the top of my shit list after what he’d done to Kale. I held him responsible for Kale’s snap in sanity. Still, I needed someone on my side with this. It would be a risk to trust him but one that might be worth taking.
“I know he’s had a heavy hand in controlling your life since your parents died,” Briggs spoke softly. “I’m sorry about that. He’s not here by accident. He chose this city for a reason. And you. But, I’m not sure how much I can share. I need to know I can trust you.”
I swung my gaze back to Briggs, letting the wolf rise up to fill my eyes. He did a great job of maintaining his composure. Only the subtle increase of his pulse gave away his unease.
“Trust is a two way street, Briggs. How the hell am I supposed to trust a man who keeps people locked up like animals?”
“There’s more to it than that.” His response came fast, and for the first time, he couldn’t meet my eyes. “Those people are dangerous. They are a threat to the general public. Every single one of them. ”
“Then why not just kill them?” I countered, my suspicions growing.
“It’s not that simple. We need them.”
I nodded, my suspicions confirmed. “Right. Stop the vehicle and let me out. We’re done here.”
The driver looked to Briggs for direction. He shook his head and waved off my demand.
“I don’t call all the shots; I take orders from the top. What happens with those people is not my call. It’s irrelevant to this discussion. Can you honestly say your moral track record is squeaky clean? You’ve killed humans. You recently turned one. If we let our personal business stand in the way, we will never have a hope in hell of stopping Shya.”
The smell of so many humans was starting to get to me. Being confined in the Escalade with them was slowly becoming a true test. The hunger that struck me inside the dance club lurked, waiting for a chance to shatter my fragile control.
“So, if we put our heads together to figure out Shya, then you never get involved in my business or personal activity? Is that a guarantee?” I let my breath out slowly. My mind raced as I tried to think of anything to diminish the bloodlust’s hold. I would not lose it in a car full of FPA agents.
“As long as you keep your activity quiet and stay away from my agents. I don’t need a repeat of what happened with Bianca.” Briggs snorted in disgust.
“What exactly did happen with her? I wasn’t part of that.”
Briggs was almost fuming. His cell phone beeped, stealing his attention. When he looked back at me, he forced a fake nonchalance.
“Arys roughed her up pretty badly. He made her talk. She told him about an item we’ve been looking for. One that Shya is also seeking. I don’t know how much she told him, but it was enough. I had to kill her.” He shrugged, as if taking out one of his own was all in a day’s work.
Bianca was dead. That little bomb left me shaking on the inside. I should have been happy to hear the vampiress who had seduced my wolf mate was nothing but ash and dust, but I wasn’t. I felt cheated because I hadn’t been the one to do it.
“That’s another thing,” Briggs continued. “Arys Knight. Keep him away from my people. I can’t afford to lose anyone else, especially not to a vampire doing Shya’s dirty work.”
“Alright,” I said, my gaze narrowed and stern. “Same goes for you. Keep your agents out of my nightclub. Nobody touches another of my vampires or werewolves, either.”
The Escalade circled around the downtown district, heading toward The Wicked Kiss. It was time to wrap this up. There was a moment of silence that quickly grew awkward. I could feel Briggs staring at me while I peered out the window.
“What, Briggs? Just spit out whatever’s on your mind.”
“You and Arys. You’re not just lovers. I hear you’re very powerful together. How does that work?”
I chuckled. So, Mr. Big Time Government Agent didn’t know everything. “In order for me to tell you, I’d have to know the answer myself. Don’t worry about it. We’re none of your concern, I promise.”
He didn’t look convinced. “I guess I’ll have to take your word for it.”
We pulled to a stop in front of The Wicked Kiss. The doors opened, and the agents who were piled in next to me got out, moving so I could exit the vehicle. Briggs got out, too, waiting until every agent was back inside the Escalade.
“We need to share information. Somewhere private and safe.” He cast a critical look at the nightclub, watching the patrons lingering near the door.
“I’d suggest consecrated ground. Everywhere else is suspect. Besides, until I know you have something serious to share, I’m not going to be too eager to play nice with you.” I turned to go, dismissing him. Boldly, he grabbed my arm to stop me.
He quickly let go, but the heat from his hand lingered. “Shya stole information from us regarding an underworld artifact. It’s hidden in a sealed chamber that’s been closed off for over a thousand years. He wants to reopen it. If he gets his hands on that artifact, he’ll rise through the ranks of the demon hierarchy. He’ll be pretty much unstoppable.” Briggs opened the passenger door of the truck and glanced back at me over his shoulder. “Is that serious enough for you?”