chapter 18
Sera numbly accepted the peroxide, cotton balls, and bandages that David handed to her before he walked over to sit on the other couch. She fumbled with the peroxide, spilling some on her filthy jeans before finally managing to get it on a cotton ball. She winced as she gingerly cleaned the jagged tears in her chest. Her hands trembled as she ripped the plastic wrapping around the large bandage, and quickly taped it to her chest.
She closed her eyes as she took a deep, steadying breath, and tugged anxiously at her torn shirt. “He’s all right,” David said gently.
Sera nodded. “I know.”
“Can you sense him?”
She frowned. “Sense him?”
“Yes, can you sense him, feel him?”
“No. I just know that he’s all right, for now.”
“He’ll be fine. He’s strong.”
“Who were they?” she whispered.
“Probably some of Beth’s friends. I’m sure that she’s created a few others along the way, and that some of them have stayed with her. Or, she’s gathered some here to help. We’re not all the same Sera. Some of us are brutal killers. They relish in their power, thrill in it. The more you drink, and the more you kill, the stronger you are. They may be here just because Beth promised them a bloodbath.”
Sera’s hands trembled as she pulled anxiously at her shirt. Terror was beginning to claw its way up her throat. “Liam, Jack, Mike, and Doug aren’t killers. They won’t be as strong as them.”
“No they’re not, but they will be all right. Liam’s fury alone will be enough to overpower them. They just want the pleasure of the blood. He wants to keep you safe, that is a far stronger motivator.”
“Oh God,” she moaned. “He needs to come back.”
“He will. They’ll drive them away, but he won’t follow them. He won’t go far from you, not now.”
She nodded numbly as tears slid down her face. She had to believe that David was right. If Liam didn’t come back, if he got hurt, if he got killed... Her heart shattered at the thought as she began to tremble. ‘Please God,’ she prayed silently. ‘Please let him come back to me.’ “I can’t live without him,” she whispered.
David clasped his hands together and leaned forward. “No, you probably can’t.”
Sera choked on a sob as she bowed her head and fiddled with her shirt. “Can they come in here?”
“No, they weren’t invited. Only Beth can come in here. Sera...”
“You okay?” Sera jerked around as Mike appeared anxiously in the doorway.
She leapt instantly to her feet. “Where is he?” she demanded.
“In the kitchen, but...” Mike blocked her as she reached the doorway. She glared angrily at him as she tilted her chin defiantly. “You need to stay here.”
“I...”
“No Sera, not now.” His stance was so rigid that she knew arguing with him was useless.
“Is he all right?”
“He’s fine, he’s just a little, ah… he’s a little wild at the moment. Jack and Doug are with him.”
“Are you sure?” she asked anxiously.
“Yes, why don’t you sit down and relax.”
“What about you guys, are you all right?”
She scanned him quickly, but he seemed fine. “Yeah, we’re all fine. They took off when we went outside. I think they just wanted to let us know that they’re here. That they’re watching us.”
Sera’s gaze flickered toward the kitchen. She wanted to go to him; she needed to go to him. “I can calm him down,” she whispered.
“Not now you can’t,” David said. “Now, you will push him over the edge.”
“But he needs me!” she cried as she whirled to face him.
“Yes, he does, but not like you are. Not with what is going on. He will finish what he started earlier Sera; don’t doubt that for an instant.”
For a moment she didn’t care. But, it was only for a moment as she recalled the way that he had been earlier. He would never listen to reason now. He would only attack her again. He wouldn’t even give her the chance to offer herself to him. As much as she wanted to be with him, she knew that she couldn’t let it happen like that. He would hurt her, no matter how unintentional, he would. And he would hate himself for it.
She bowed her head as she turned and walked back to the couch. Her heart was breaking as tears rolled down her face. She slid limply onto the couch and hung her head in her hands. “Do you understand now that what I told was true?” David asked softly.
She lifted her head to look at him through blurry eyes. “I understood that earlier.”
David frowned as he glanced quickly over at Mike. “You want to be changed?”
“I won’t lose him. I can’t. It... It hurts to even think about it, to say it. You can’t imagine how much it hurts.”
“No, we can’t.”
“Why hasn’t he done it already?” Mike asked his voice filled with confusion.
She turned her eyes to him. “He said that I would need blood, and Kathleen and Danielle... I can’t. I just can’t.”
“Crap!” Mike muttered. “I never realized... I forgot.”
David dropped his head into his hands. “We need to get out of here.”
“Maybe the roads will be open tomorrow,” Mike said hopefully.
“I doubt it. We’re miles from the highway, on a bunch of back roads. I wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t get here for another week.”
“He doesn’t have a week, and neither does she.”
“I know that!” David snapped.
“What happens if I don’t have blood?” she asked quietly.
They both turned wary, troubled eyes on her. “If you don’t get it within the first day, the transformation won’t be complete. You’ll die.”
“Or turn into a creature stuck between the worlds. Something completely twisted; an utter monstrosity. You would have to be destroyed.”
“You could have left it at I’d die,” she said dryly.
“We’ll figure out something,” David said.
“What?” she muttered.
“I don’t know, but we’re going to have to do it soon. Very soon.”
***
The feathery touch on her cheek woke her slowly the next morning. She smiled as she nuzzled into Liam’s hand for a moment. Then, the events of the night crashed back over her and her eyes flew open. He was kneeling before her, his eyes dark and clouded, his face hard and impassive.
She sat up slowly. Her neck and back were stiff from sleeping on the couch, what little sleep she had managed to get. She had waited for him to come to her all night, but he hadn’t, and eventually exhaustion had won out and taken her under. She glanced quickly around the living room, but they were alone.
She returned her attention to him. He was gazing at her intently, his eyes narrowed and assessing. She had changed her shirt last night, but his gaze had settled upon where the bandage was. “Are you okay?” he asked hoarsely.
“Yes.”
“I hurt you.”
“No...”
“Yes, I did!”
Sera winced at the anger that radiated from his voice. “Liam...”
He seized hold of her arms and pulled them forward. Sera tried to jerk them back, but he was already shoving the sleeve’s up. Bruises marred her upper arms, and the delicate bones of her wrist. His breath rushed out of him as he gazed upon the ugly, dark marks. Marks that he had inflicted. He dropped his head as self loathing seized hold of him.
“You didn’t mean too,” she whispered as she brushed back his raven hair. “It wasn’t you.”
His eyes blazed with fury. “It was me!” he spat. “It is me!”
Her lower lip began to tremble as tears filled her eyes. He had thought that he had himself under control enough to see her, to come near her. He’d been wrong. His composure was quickly unraveling as he thought about what could have happened to her, what Beth could have done to her, what he could have done to her.
He dropped her arms and stood swiftly. “Liam please don’t shut me out.”
He couldn’t shut her out if he tried. He couldn’t get her out of his mind, out of his body, out of his soul. She was a part of him, and he needed her even more than the blood that kept him alive. “I have to go somewhere.”
“Where?”
“David and I are going to take the snowmobiles out.”
“You can’t!” she cried. “You can’t go out there! Those things are out there! She’s out there!”
Fury clouded his vision. He knew what was out there better than she did. He knew what they wanted, and that was her. “Liam,” he heard her stand, but he didn’t turn to face her.
“Sera stay away, just stay away.” She sat back on the couch. “I have to go. This is something that I have to do.”
“Why?”
He ground his teeth as he moved further away from her. He could smell her blood. The memory of what it tasted like caused his teeth to lengthen, and his mouth to water. “I have to find food,” he grated.
“You can just go into the woods!” she cried.
“For you. I have to find food for you.”
She gasped softly as her hand fluttered to her throat. “Oh,” she said dully as realization sank in. “I see.”
“When I come back...” he grated.
Sera bit into her bottom lip. “I know.”
“Good.” He turned and walked from the room. He had to get away from her, now.
“Liam.” He froze in the doorway as her voice drifted over him. “Please be careful.”
“I will be.”
“I love you.”
He closed his eyes, clenched his jaw, and forced himself to leave before he couldn’t.
***
Sera gazed out the window as dusk descended. She had long ago retired to her room, unable to face Kathleen’s enthusiasm, Danielle’s bright laughter, and Mike, Doug, and Jack’s silent, pitying glances. Her own thoughts were in such turmoil that she could barely understand what they were saying to her, let alone try to function.
She turned away from the window and moved stiffly toward the bed. These were her last hours as a human, her last hours as a person. Despair filled her as she slumped to the mattress. She wondered if it would hurt. It was a little uncomfortable when Liam bit her, but not really painful. But he hadn’t taken it all before. He would now. When he changed her, when she died, would it hurt? It had too, dying couldn’t be easy.
She shuddered as she wrapped her arms around herself. She was sitting here, waiting for death to come, for her death. She should run, she should flee into the night, and never look back. But she couldn’t move. She had nowhere to run too, and even if she did, she knew that she would return to him.
It was the waiting that was killing her. The creeping by of minutes that was making her so edgy and frightened. She wondered where he was. She knew that he was safe, she could feel that, but she still wondered where he was, and when he would return for her. And would it hurt?
She bit into her bottom lip as she clasped her hands tightly. She could leave. If she left now, then she would be able to put some distance between herself and the cabin. There was another snowmobile, she could take that and go. No one would even know until it was too late.
A soft knock at the door caused her to jump. “Sera, are you okay?” Mike asked.
“Yes,” she called back.
“Let me know if you need anything.”
“I will.”
He had come down at least twenty times since she had locked herself in over two hours ago. She knew that he was just worried, but he was driving her insane. Her nerves were frayed enough without being startled every ten minutes by him. She should have gotten used to expecting him, but her thoughts were too discombobulated to even try to remember that Mike would be coming by.
She stood back up and began to pace the room. Suddenly she stopped, her head tilted to the side as she looked at the night beyond the window. Liam was back. She knew it, felt it. She walked slowly over and closed the blinds. Her hand trembled slightly as she stepped back. A steel cord of resolve strengthened her spine. She knew what she had to do.
***
Liam and David stomped the snow off their shoes as they entered the back porch. He quickly shed his wet winter clothes. It had taken hours, and miles of snow, but they had eventually found an open rest area. It had taken almost as long to wait for enough people to stop there but eventually they had. He’d fed until he couldn’t feed anymore, and then fed again.
He needed to make sure that he had enough for Sera; that she would get enough blood for everything to go smoothly. He had seen the things that got stuck in between human and vampire, and they were horrendous monstrosities. He would die before he allowed that to happen to her.
“You going to be okay?” David asked worriedly.
“Yeah.”
Now that he had fed, and the moment was nearly upon him, he was much calmer and more relaxed. He had nearly gone insane on the ride to the rest area, and had driven like a bat out of hell all the way back with the monster clawing at his insides. But now, here, he actually felt somewhat in control of himself again. For the first time since yesterday afternoon, he actually had a firm grip upon himself.
His heart contracted when he saw that Sera wasn’t in the living room. “You’re back!” Kathleen greeted brightly.
“Where’s Sera?” he demanded.
“In her room,” Kathleen replied. “Taking a nap.”
His gaze swung wildly to Mike. “You left her alone?” he snapped. The idea of it rattled his newly found composure.
“She’s perfectly capable of taking care of herself!” Kathleen retorted.
Liam’s jaw clenched, but he refused to look at her. “She’s fine,” Mike said. “I’ve been checking on her, and don’t forget I can sense Beth’s presence too.”
“Who’s Beth?” Danielle asked.
“Oh crap,” Jack moaned in disgust. “Good going Mike. I’m not doing it this time!”
“Doing what?” Kathleen demanded haughtily.
David chuckled under his breath as he stepped into the room. “Be gentle,” he mumbled to Liam. “I’ll do it,” he volunteered.
“Do what?” Kathleen and Danielle asked in unison.
Liam couldn’t help but laugh as he turned on his heel and headed down the hall. He paused at the door, suddenly hesitant. He didn’t know what would happen when he saw her. Didn’t know what he would do. He only hoped that he could keep himself under control for as long as this took. He didn’t want to hurt her anymore than was necessary, anymore than he already had.
He took a deep breath and pushed the door open. The room was dark, the blinds closed against the night. His eyes instantly adjusted to it. “Sera,” he said softly.
She was sitting on the bed, the blanket wrapped around her as she gazed at him with wide eyes. “I knew you were back,” she whispered. “I felt it.”
He frowned as he stepped into the room and closed the door. “Are you okay?”
“Yes. Did you succeed?”
“Yes.”
“Good.” The word caused his entire body to tighten. “Does it hurt?”
He wanted to tell her that it didn’t, but he couldn’t. “Yes.”
“A lot?” she asked tremulously.
“Sera,” he breathed.
“I’m not changing my mind. I’m just scared.”
“I understand that.”
“I wanted to leave. I wanted to run. I don’t want to die. But I couldn’t leave you. I couldn’t make my legs go. I just couldn’t.”
Her words brought the beast surging forth. He inhaled deeply, trying to calm it as his hand tightened upon the door handle. “I’ll try to make it as easy as possible on you.”
She stood slowly and moved toward him. The shadows shifted and moved around her as she stepped from their embrace. “I know you will.”
His hands shook as he seized hold of her shoulders. She smiled softly as she released the blanket. It slipped smoothly down her body to puddle on the floor at her feet. The shadows hugged every inch of naked flesh as her hair cascaded freely down her back in thick, golden waves. Her full breasts heaved with her quick inhalations. The white bandage covered her delicate skin from her collarbone to mid breast plate. The sight of it was enough to nearly drive him mad. His hands tightened upon her. She was trembling, but she didn’t move away from him.
“Make love to me,” she whispered. “Do it then.”
He groaned as her soft words shoved the creature aside and brought the man forth. He scooped her into his arms and carried her easily across the room. Depositing her on the bed, he fell on top of her in a heedless rush as his mouth seized upon hers. She whimpered as her hands dug into his hair. She pulled him tighter against her as her tongue intertwined wildly with his.
His hands stroked her breasts until her nipples hardened. Now that he was here, with her, he suddenly wanted to go slow, to savor every moment, and to relish in the feel of her. He wanted to memorize every inch of her glorious, silken body.
He kissed her lovingly as he tasted the sweetness of her mouth. Somewhere along the way she managed to slip his sweater over his head. She ran her hands lightly along the hard muscles of his back. They shifted and bunched beneath her gentle touch as she kissed, explored, and tasted him. The hair on his chest was wiry against her cheek; the bristles on his chin rubbed her delicate skin. She teased his nipples, bringing them to life as he had brought hers.
He kissed and explored her as he made love to her slowly with his fingers and his mouth. There was no urgency, no rush as he moved gently over her. Although she was trembling with anticipation, wet with need, he didn’t take her, and she didn’t rush him to do so.
His jeans were somehow removed. He rubbed his hard head against her temptingly wet sheath, but still didn’t bury himself within her. He wanted to spend the whole night feeling her, tasting her, teasing her, but her body became too tempting to refuse.
Sera trembled as he rubbed against her, and slid a little way in before pulling back out. She arched against him, moaning her dismay, and letting her urgency be known with her writhing movements. She needed him now. She wanted him to fill her, to stretch her, to be a part of her. He slid slowly in again, going a little further this time before pulling back out. She tightened her legs around his waist as she nipped at his shoulder to show her displeasure.
He chuckled softly as he slipped back into her. “I intend to drive you wild with want,” he whispered in her ear.
“You already are!” she gasped.
He slid back into her and buried himself to the hilt with a low groan of possession. Her legs tightened around him as she arched into him. He moved slowly within her, his mouth on hers as he made love to her with deliberate tenderness. His lips slid over her neck, her shoulders, her delicate collarbone and trembling breasts.
He moved his hand between their bodies and gently rubbed the hardened nub between her thighs. He watched as her eyes clouded with passion, her lip began to tremble, and her body bucked beneath him. She cried out as her hands tightened upon his back, and her muscles contracted deliciously around him.
His smile was pure satisfaction as her legs loosened, and she fell limp, and trembling, to the bed. She gazed dazedly at him as a content smile curved her full lips. “We’re not done love,” he murmured. Her eyes widened in surprise as she gazed at him. “Not by a long shot.”
He took possession of her mouth again as he began to move slowly within her again, leisurely sparking the fire of passion back to life. Sera was amazed to find her body responding to his again. She hadn’t known it was possible to feel so completely sated, and still want more. Yet as his hands stroked her, and his body moved within hers, she found herself swept up with him again.
He waited until he knew that she was close and he knew he could push her over the edge any time he wanted. He wished that he could go on like this all night, but his restraint was slipping further away with every soft moan and gasp of pleasure. She felt so good that it took all he had not to end his own torment and spill into her. But he intended to wait for her. This time, he would go with her.
He smoothed the hair back from her neck and his eyes latched onto the marks. The animal did not burst free, but came leisurely, and at his command. “It’s time Sera,” he whispered.
Her eyes were glazed as she nodded slowly. “Yes.”
He bent his head to her neck as she turned her head to allow him better access. He bit into her. Sera cried out softly as her hands dug into his back. He drove hard into her as her blood filled his mouth and flowed down his throat. She moaned as her body ground against his. As her blood flowed, he brought her to the brink of the abyss and with a final, deep thrust, he drove them both over.
She cried out as she fell back against the bed, her body trembling, weak, and very sedated. Liam held her shaking body as he felt the weakening within her. He also felt her utter trust, blissful contentment, and the unconditional, shocking amount of love that she possessed for him. Her hands on his back began to slacken, her grip on his waist eased. He was strengthened and calmed as he was filled with her.
Finally, he pulled away. She lay upon the bed, pale, and unmoving. Her lashes curled against her slender, delicate cheek. A sense of urgency enveloped him as he reached for the dagger he had left by the bed. He quickly made a cut against the base of his throat and scooped her up. He seized hold of her head and pulled her forward. Her head lolled back, a whimper escaped her as he lifted her to the blood on his neck.
“Drink Sera,” he ordered briskly.
For a moment she didn’t respond. Panic flared through him as his hand clenched tighter on her head. Had he taken too much? He had never done this before, but the demon inside had instinctively withdrawn from her when he had reached a certain point. He knew that he had taken enough to kill her, more than enough. He could hear the soft flutter of her heart as it beat weakly within her delicate ribcage. It was getting weaker with each passing second and slowed with every beat.
“Sera drink!”
The butterfly brush of her lips against his neck tightened his body. And then her mouth enclosed on him. He sighed with relief as his hands dug into her thick hair and cradled her skull. At first she simply lay and allowed the blood to drain into her. He could feel it slipping inside, drifting into her veins, and burning through her body.
Then, her hands clenched tightly upon his back, and she clamped down. Liam groaned with ecstasy as her mouth sucked at him. He was filling her in every way, making her his in every way. He grew hard inside of her, but didn’t move. Suddenly her mind filled his. Pleasure swamped him, followed by an urgent longing for more. There was no fear anymore as she bit harder. Liam’s hands clenched on her head as he ground his teeth against the urge to begin moving within her, to take her in every way again.
He pulled out of her, and she bit harder as her displeasure radiated through him. He didn’t have to tell her that this was the easy part, he was certain that she already knew; that she could feel it in him. She was growing sated on him as she neared the end. Her heart fluttered and skipped a beat. A fierce stab of pain ripped through her and tore into his mind. He groaned as she whimpered and trembled.
She was gasping as she fell back. “Sera it’s going to hurt, but it doesn’t last long.”
Her eyes were clouded and hazy as they met his. Her lips were swollen from his kisses, and covered with his blood. His finger lingered upon her luscious mouth as he wiped the blood away. Her body arched off the bed as a cry of agony tore from her. He buried his face in her hair as she bucked and kicked beneath him. He wished that he could take all of her pain away, absorb it into himself, but he couldn’t.
They all had to go through the agony of dying, and being reborn.
A scream tore from her throat as she twisted away from him and drew her legs up against her chest. He allowed her to twist to the side, but kept his arms wrapped tightly around her. She buried her head in his chest as shivers wracked her body. Sweat began to pour from her as she moaned and whimpered in agony.
He tried to soothe her, but there was nothing that he could do. She screamed again as her body jackknifed off the bed. He seized hold of her shoulders and pinned her back down. A wail erupted from her, her fingernails ripped into his forearms as she attempted to jerk free. Her head whipped wildly back and forth as she arched and bucked and withered.
A soft cry escaped from her as she curled back into a ball. Tears streaked her face as she lay sweating and shivering. Liam grabbed the blanket and wrapped her securely within it before drawing her tight against his chest. He knew from experience that the worst of it was over, but it would be a long time before the spasms and shooting pains subsided.
He soothed her damp hair from her face and lay beside her as he encircled her protectively. “It will be all right,” he promised. “The worst is over.”
She whimpered in response as another shudder wracked through her and she trembled within his grasp. “Hold on Sera. It will be all right.”
He continued to soothe her with his words and gentle touch. It was after two in the morning before she finally drifted to sleep. He lay awake long after, fighting against waves of self hatred and exultation. He had hurt her deeply. Even now, in her sleep, she whimpered and moaned every once in awhile. But no matter how much he hated himself for it, she was his, she was finally all his. No one would ever take her from him. Ever.