“I heard that,” Bailey called out as she cut the grapes in half to make it easier for a sleepy Maddy to chew.
“Anyway,” Tawny continued, “I just want to get married and play poker and the slots and goof around. I don’t want it all serious and pretentious like when Farah got married.”
Smiling sweetly, Farah swiped a dab of peanut butter on Tawny’s nose. “Be nice or I’ll have the dogs lick it off. You’ll be trapped under their tongues for hours.”
“I prefer to be trapped under Judd’s tongue.”
“Are you two having a ‘who gets fucked more’ competition?” I asked.
“Yep,” Tawny said, cleaning off her nose. “The guys started it. You know, right after they whipped out their dicks and measured.”
“Man, too bad I missed that.”
“Need to pee,” Maddy announced and the Johansson sisters helped her to her feet. “I can waddle on my own, but thanks.”
Bailey watched her go then joined us in the kitchen while Sawyer tried to convince a dog to let her do his nails.
“I’m going to be a great mom one day,” Bailey said. “I just have this natural way with children. Like this morning when Sawyer got her hair stuck in the door, I opened it and freed her. I did that without anyone asking me to. Natural talent.”
A part of me figured Bailey knew she was full of shit. Yet, another part wondered if she had a clue. It was always tricky to tell.
“Hey, guys,” Maddy muttered, waddling back into the room. “I think those were real contractions.”
“Ew, did your water break?” Bailey asked. “Gross.”
“No, but I’m bleeding. When the mucus plug falls out and lining thins for delivery, bleeding happens. This is it.”
Bailey patted Maddy’s cheek. “I’m really excited for you, but that’s so gross and I never want children. At the very least, I’m buying them on the black market so I don’t have to do that gross delivery shit.”
Farah and Tawny rushed over to help Maddy to the car while I grabbed the hospital bag she took with her everywhere. Bailey called the Johanssons while Sawyer spun around and got her hair caught in a few things. I freed the child without anyone telling me to, so based on Bailey’s way of thinking, I would be a great mom one day.
Soon, we were on the road. In the backseat, Farah sat with Bailey and Maddy. I was up front with Tawny who showed off the evasive driving tricks Judd taught her. Sawyer sat between us and chewed on gum that I sensed would end up in her hair.
Chapter Forty One - Aaron
Tucker had created the Thunderdome in Ellsberg. Well, except no one died. Otherwise, the dunce had come up with an idea, executed it, and found success. I hadn’t been so proud of Cooper’s stupid little brother since that time he figured out the slot on the front of the jeans was for pissing.
Cooper was impressed too, but he tried not to show it. Tucker tended to get too big for his britches from any compliment. Bad enough his girl was having a baby before Cooper’s. The Thunderdome was bound to make the idiot unbearable cocky.
“I love this fucking place,” Vaughn said, ignoring the pact to avoid complimenting Tucker. “I heard you’re adding girl on girl fights. Man, I’ll pay extra to see that.”
“Oh, and you will,” Tucker yelled over the crowd of people cheering for the next fight.
“How rough will you let the chicks get?” Judd asked, sitting down in the box seats for us important fucks. “I don’t know how sexy it’ll be to see them spitting up teeth.”
“They’ll wear teeth guards and shit. It’s more for fun. The guys know not to beat each other too badly. I mean, they want to come back and fight again, not sit in a hospital.”
Cooper nodded. “I’d so do this shit, if Farah let me.”
Vaughn made the sound of a snapping whip and the whipped guys frowned at him. He just smiled. “Ah, having control over my balls is so wonderful. You boys should beg your women to let you have them back for the night. Maybe if you promise to do the dishes or wash the floor or some other shit job, they’ll agree.”
“Vaughn,” Cooper said, giving his enforcer a dark glare, “when you meet a girl and lose your mind over her, we’re going to enjoy mocking you. I mean, it’ll be a fucking sport and we’ll trip over each other to be the next one to screw with you.”
“Hell, if I ever lose my mind over a girl, I’ll be too fucking stupid to care what you assholes say. Likely, I’ll have suffered a brain injury or some shit. In that case, you’ll be mocking a disabled man and that’s not cool.”
“He has a point,” Tucker said like he was sensitive now.
“You’re all idiots,” I muttered. “It’s rather frightening how any of you will carry on your defective genetic material into the future generation.”
“Said the guy who got his girlfriend pregnant on accident,” Vaughn said and high fived Tucker. “Yeah, I’m sick of listening to all the crap about babies and weddings and other ballfree shit. Just shut up so we can watch the fight.”