A Mess of a Man (Cruel & Beautiful #2)

“Anyway, I thought if you could get the day off tomorrow, we could drive up to the hospital tonight.”


I don’t have to ponder her question as I finally focus on her. She’s putting on the white lacey bra I’d taken off her an hour earlier. My eyes drop and I’ll admit she has a great ass. It’s even still a little red from my earlier taps. But nothing, there’s nothing there but pretty window dressing.

When she glares at me, I finally answer her question with another question.

“Why?”

She stops and scowls at me. “Why what?”

Here we go. Her voice has already started to rise.

“Why would I take the day off? I barely know the woman.” The truth is, I hardly know Karen.

“Why?” Her face turns an angry shade of pink. “I would think after all this time together you’d want to get to know my family.”

I’m about to say the wrong thing, but I say it anyway. “Why’s that?”

Her hands go to her waist and she leans towards me in that school teacher about to discipline a student kind of way. She wants a reaction and I can’t seem to wipe the bored look off my face. My hope is she gets my meaning without me spelling it out.

“Why?” She stops and takes a deep breath as if that will calm her. But I know better. Three. Two. One. Bingo. I see the change when she finally gets it. Her face softens and her hand reaches out to stroke mine. If she’s trying to smooth out my annoyed expression, it’s too late.

“The cancer thing freaks you out, I understand that. But it’s been …” she pulls back and taps her fingers against the side of her face, “what, over a year now? Granted, it’s sad your best friend died. In fact, it’s tragic. But life moves on, Ben.” Then as an afterthought she adds, “Sometimes I wonder if you two were more than just friends.”

She had to go there, which only proves how little she knows me or wants to outside of the size of my bank account. I try to rein in my anger but fail as I slam my glass down on the side table causing her to jump and her face to pale.

“He was like a brother to me. And he was twenty-nine years old for God’s sake. He should be working on having a kid with Cate, not six fucking feet under the ground.”

She lifts a hand like she’s trying to calm a dragon and maybe I am one. “I’m just saying. We’ve been together for five months now.”

I cut her off. “No, Karen, that’s where you’re wrong. We’ve been fucking for five months.”

Her back straightens and her eyes narrow. She switches back to school teacher stance and her next words are slow and deliberate, like she’s teaching me a lesson or something.

“You fucking asshole. You’re a great big jerk who’s going to die alone if you don’t get your head out of your ass.”

Asshole and jerk are just a few of the names I’ve been called over the years and it rolls off me like water. There are a number of things I could say in response, starting with how I just finished fucking her ass. However, I stay tight-lipped because it appears she’s going to leave. Score. She pulls up her skirt and yanks her shirt over her head so fast her hair is practically standing on end from static electricity. I smirk because it’s somewhat amusing.

“Nothing’s funny. And don’t bother calling me when you realize what a mistake you’re making.”

I shrug.

She mutters several more curses as she exits my front door. The noise as it slams is just the punctuation I need to clarify that our relationship is at an end. I pick up the drink and take another deep swallow. Karen was a great piece of ass, but that was it. There had never been a moment when I wanted more.

She’s right about one thing. Cancer scares me shitless. I can’t go through that ever again with anyone. I’m grateful my family doesn’t have a history of cancer because one crushing blow is enough. Drew’s death shredded me and I’m still trying to piece myself back together. And he’s been gone over a year.

I pick up my phone and hit the number I want to dial.

It rings once and my little sister and only sibling, Jenna, picks up. “What’s up Benny boy? I thought you would be driving to North Carolina by now.”

Inwardly, I sigh because that’s where Karen is going alone.

“What gave you that idea?” I ask nonchalantly.

Karen is somewhat of a friend of hers. And I have to do damage control before Karen calls her.

“My phone’s ringing. Hold on.”

“Wait, Jenna, don’t answer. I need to talk to you first.”

There is a pause and sharp as a tack, she’s putting it together.

“What did you do?”

I bite the bullet and spit it out, knowing she’s going to be pissed. “I can’t be with her.”

Silence. I mark off the time in increments of five. By the time I’m up to fifteen, she finally speaks.

“Why?”

You’d think Jenna was older than me the way she says that word.

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