Eliza and Her Monsters

Wallace laughs.

“Who’s famous?” Wallace’s roommate, Tyler, walks into the room behind Wallace carrying a hamper of laundry. Wallace explains the conversation quickly; when he mentions Monstrous Sea, Tyler bends into the webcam’s sight.

“You made Monstrous Sea?” Then he looks back at Wallace. “Your girlfriend made Monstrous Sea?”

“Her name’s Eliza,” Wallace says.

“You have to be kidding.” Tyler drops his laundry basket and hustles out of the room. A minute later, he returns with a flock of college students chattering about Monstrous Sea.

Wallace handles them well. He blocks them from the computer at first, letting them work through their preliminary questions, then lets them see me. Lets me see them.

They’re not monsters. They’re people. We greet each other, and they’re polite, and they want to know how it feels to be me.

“A lot better than it used to,” I say.

I think this will be okay. I think it will be strange, and probably scary, and I think there will still be times where I think I am the worst person on the planet. But I think I will also love myself and what I’ve made, and I’ll know without doubt that those two things are separate.

I am Eliza Mirk, daughter and sister and friend.

I am Eliza Mirk, mother of a fandom.

I am Eliza Mirk.

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