“How do you know?”
“Because he told me. I stopped seeing him as soon as I found out about Lora but he kept finding me. When you appeared he tried to speak to me again and I told him I didn't want anything to do with him and if he didn't leave me alone I'd tell people the truth. He told me he'd kill you if I spoke a word to anyone. I didn't want that on my conscious as well. And he wouldn't stop there either. I swear, Jaz, I didn't know it would kill Lora. I didn't. I didn't know it was hemlock. I thought it was wolfsbane.”
“Wolfsbane?”
“It makes us Change. And I thought she'd Change. But then she got sick. When I found out, I threatened to tell Nik everything. He said he'd kill Carr and Nik and everyone else I care about. He doesn't know I suspect who he might be otherwise he'd kill everyone on that list and then me.
“I-I'm so sorry I was so awful to you. I saw Lora in you and it just freaked me out because it reminded me every day what I did. I still care about Nik, but I wasn't really jealous of you two; not like I had been before. Carr changed me. He means everything to me. Please don't do anything to him. I swear he didn't play any part in this.”
“Did he... did he know about Lora? Did he know how she died?”
Fraya froze and then with her eyes closed, tears escaping her eyelashes, she nodded. “But he doesn't know who got me to do it. I never told him anything about the Black Cloak. And he didn't have any hand in it. I swear.”
That wasn't enough, Jaz was certain. The fact Carr had known all this time what, and more importantly who, or at least partly who, had killed Lora- Nik's mate, the mother of his child, Jaz's twin sister- Carr was bound to pay.
And Jaz hated being right.
*
Nik couldn't even look Carr in the eye because of his disgust in him.
In one line he banished Carr from the Pack. Jaz didn't understand the seriousness and weight of such a punishment but the expression on Carr's face showed it meant a great deal. She remembered how she had felt, when she'd been taken away from her human life and got a glimpse of how it must be for him, to be driven away from his home. Only he didn't have anyone to leave with, or another home to go to.
Fraya's punishment was far worse.
Jaz still couldn't believe or understand why Nik allowed -in fact insisted- that she was present when Fraya was executed by hemlock poisoning.
She'd been given a lethal dose three hours before and Jaz had to stand and watch as Fraya gasped hungrily for air, vomited repeatedly, writhing and trembling as she lost control of her muscles.
Maria and Erica stood either side of Jaz; a firm, supportive grip on both her arms but Jaz shrugged them off, unable to stand the feel of the hands of a community who could allow such cruelty.
Just before death, Fraya smiled up at her Leader as if she was thanking him for finally being relieved and forgiven for her crimes. Nik stood in front of her with his arms folded, as she died in front of him.
In the silence that followed Fraya's death, Jaz swallowed a sob, which escaped her lips like the cry of a strangled animal. She pressed her hand to her mouth and left, turning her back on the man she didn't know if she loved anymore because of the immense hate and disgust and abhorrence she felt for him at that moment.
She'd seen enough death.
Fraya didn't deserve this death. She didn't deserve to die full stop.
Jaz didn't look back as she marched away from the corral. The sound of horses neighing in the stables pulled on the strings of her heart. She didn't know why, but the sound always made her want to cry; now more than ever. It was haunting, like the pining of restless spirits from the other world. Now Fraya would be amongst them.
Jaz had only been to the stables once or twice. Now she didn't know if she'd ever be able to go back.
This place would never be the same again.
~Chapter 42 - Grieve~
Monday July 4th, 8:27 a.m.
Deer Creek
For two days Jaz didn't speak to anyone. She didn't have the physical or mental energy to move her lips; to form a sentence. She kept seeing Alf's bloody, melted face. In her dreams. When she woke.
He was being treated at a special facility not far from the arena. It was the closest place they could take him in his critical condition.
That morning, Skye came into her bedroom. She didn't speak at first like she hadn't for the past two days she'd been there. Jaz thought she'd just sit with her in silence like before. This time, Edda was standing by the door. Jaz's gaze fell on her for a moment before Skye spoke.
“Alf is fine. He'll be back here by the end of the week.”
Jaz watched Skye, reading the hesitation and unease in her face. She then put up her emotional barriers, preparing herself for Skye's next words.
“He's badly scarred... And he lost his right hand.”
Jaz stared at her for one long minute without blinking before her entire body shook and she lost herself in a fit of racking, uncontrollable sobs. She began punching the bed and wailing.
Skye clasped her hands to Jaz's face, touching her forehead to hers and muttering soothing words that Jaz just couldn't absorb with her grieving mind. Edda wrapped her arms from behind Jaz's back, and after twenty minutes of full-blown weeping she slowly stopped, replacing her cries with heavy, exhausted breaths.
He had jumped in front of that fireball to save her.