Affirmation by Sawyer Bennett
Things are off, and I can’t quite put my finger on it.
Ever since Marissa showed up this past weekend and took Gabe, Matt has been a little withdrawn. When I ask him what’s wrong, he gives me a bright smile and says ‘nothing’. When I try to talk about something personal, he deflects and gets me turned around in another direction.
Some things are the same. For example, the sex is still nuclear and consistent. We can’t get enough of each other and for that, I’m thankful. Still… I feel like I’m grasping onto Matt, like he’s on the verge of slipping away, and that is causing me a lot of anxiety.
“That smells fantastic,” Matt says as he comes up behind me while I stir the spaghetti sauce. He puts his hands on my hips and leans his chin on my shoulder to watch me cook. It’s a simple gesture, but one that gives me hope that maybe things will be okay.
“Why don’t you set the table? This will be done soon.”
“Sure. Will Macy be joining us?”
I shake my head. “She’s got a date, and by date, I mean she has a one-night stand.”
Chuckling, Matt grabs a few plates and silverware to take to the table. “I thought I used that service a lot, but Macy takes the cake.”
Turning to look at him, I try to keep the jealousy out of my voice. “Exactly how often were you using it before you met me?”
Setting the last fork down, he turns to gaze at me, with a knowing smile on his face. He walks up to me and holds my chin between his thumb and forefinger. Leaning down, he gives me a light kiss. “I used it a lot, Mac. But none of those one-night stands ever compared to you, and I don’t miss it in the slightest.”
And just like that, Matt has erased some of the uneasiness I had been feeling about our relationship.
After dinner, we both get comfy in my living room. I have to review a deposition transcript, and Matt is watching ESPN’s Sports Center. We sit beside each other companionably until I finish, which is indicated by the fact I throw the transcript on my coffee table and give a huge yawn.
Matt practically pounces on me. “About damn time you got done. I’ve been dying to fuck you.”
Giggling, I wrap my warms around his neck as he kisses me like his life depends on it. “You could have had me at any time,” I tell him when we come up for air.
“I was trying to be a gentleman,” he says as he lifts me from the couch and carries me back to my bedroom. “But I’m not feeling so gentlemanly now. Think you can take it a little rough?”
I slide down the front of him when we reach my bed, feeling how hard he is already, and a thrill of excitement goes through me. “I can take anything you’ve got.”
Eyes firing hot with desire, he pulls me back to him and crushes my mouth with his. It’s carnal, possessive, and I love it. Just as he’s pulling my shirt over my head, his phone starts ringing. The ringtone is Heart’s Barracuda, and Matt tenses up when he hears it.
“Fuck,” he says, stepping away from me and taking his phone out of his pocket.
Connecting the call, he holds it to his ear and snarls, “What do you want?”
I watch as he listens to, who I’m guessing is Marissa, on the other end. The ringtone sort of gave it away, but Matt’s demeanor pretty much solidifies it. He listens for several minutes, his face getting even tighter. He even clenches one hand in a fist until the skin on his knuckles pales to white.
“Absolutely not,” Matt says. “I won’t agree to it.”
He listens for a bit more, and I can practically hear him gritting his teeth. Then his face changes, softens slightly. His voice is warm and open. “Hey buddy. So what do you want to do this weekend?”
Again, Matt listens and his eyes close as if he’s in pain, causing my heart to lurch for him.