***
The weeks drift by in a sea of mind-numbing schoolwork. I spend a lot of my free time with Callie, and during class, I pretend not to notice Greyson. His hot-as-hell presence torments me, but I don’t attempt to talk to him. I’m too mortified over my behavior at the restaurant and frustrated with myself for letting my past control me. Since life doesn’t offer mulligans, I do the only thing I can. I just go with the flow.
I’ve just about convinced myself that I’m over my crush on Greyson when he leans toward me right in the middle of the professor’s lecture. Just like that, I’m right back where I started. Completely obsessed.
“So, do you get anything he’s saying?” he whispers under his breath.
My initial instinct is to look around and see if anyone is watching us, but I get caught up in the delicious scent of his cologne and blank out. “Yeah, a little bit.”
His brow crooks. “You said you weren’t a fan of school.”
“Yeah, I’m not. It doesn’t mean that I suck at all my classes, though. I just prefer not to have my head crammed with mostly useless knowledge.”
His gaze drops to his open textbook then lands back at me. “Maybe you could tutor me, then. English isn’t really my forte.”
I question whether he’s being serious or just using tutoring as an excuse to hang out. “What is your forte? Because I’m really curious.” My flirty tone comes out and shocks me a little.
“Photography.” He pats his bag, where a camera strap is hanging out. “I actually got a scholarship. That’s part of the reason why I ended up here.”
The professor dismisses class and we start to gather our stuff.
“Seriously? That’s fucking cool.” I glance down at his bag as I stand to my feet and stretch out my arms. “Can I see some of your photos or is that too personal, like people with their journals?”
“No, it’s okay.” He gets to his feet, unzips his bag, and pulls out his camera.
“Are you sure? Sometimes I have issues with crossing the boundaries of personal space. Or so I’ve been told. Personally, I don’t see it.”
He chuckles as he taps a button, the screen lights up, and he hands it to me. “No, I promise you’re cool. A lot of my photos have been entered in contests, so tons of people have seen them.”
“Awesome.” I hold the camera in my hands and try to figure out how to get to the slideshow.
He leans over, pressing a button on the screen, and his fingers brush mine before he pulls away. My stomach spins like a disco ball, but I focus on flipping through the photos.
Scrolling through each one, I notice a few landscapes, but most are of people. In each shot, he manages to capture a passionate sense of emotion. “Wow, these are amazing.”
I’m a little stunned when I recognize the people in the next frame. I stop, staring down at a photo of me laughing with Callie outside on a bench. I tap to the next one and then the next, both of which are of me. In fact, the next twenty are all of me. Some I look happy in, but in a few, I see the pain I always carry with me.
I look over at Greyson. “When did you take these?”
With his brows furrowed, he leans over to see what I’m looking at. Then his eyes widen. “Fuck, I forgot those were on there.” He snatches the camera away from me, shuts it off, and stuffs it into his bag. “I swear I’m not a stalker. I just saw you on the first day of school and,” he slings his bag over his arm, and then fiddles with a leather bracelet on his wrist, “I don’t know, I just wanted to take pictures of you.”
He’s so embarrassed he’s actually blushing, which is quite possibly the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen.
“It’s okay,” I tease, falling right back into the flirty again, for a moment being the old Seth. “I know how irresistible I can be.”
A small smile rises on his lips as we head out of the classroom. “So, you’re not completely weirded out?”
I shake my head. “Oddly, I’m kind of flattered, but that’s probably the attention whore side of me speaking.”
He peers around the empty room and then stares at me.
“What?” I pause in the doorway, suddenly feeling self-conscious.
“It’s nothing. I just realized you never did answer me about the tutoring thing.”
“You really need a tutor?” Because I’m highly suspicious that this is his way of asking me out.
“A little bit.” The lie is written all over his face, but he doesn’t seem like he’s trying very hard to cover it up. “Maybe you could come over to my apartment tonight and help me with that stupid essay we’re supposed to be writing. We could get some pizza or takeout.”
As we step into the hallway, I open my mouth to answer, still unsure whether I’m going to reject or accept his offer. I never get to find out how brave I’m feeling today, because my phone goes nuts inside my pocket.
“Hold that thought.” I hold up my finger while I dig out my phone from my pocket.
Callie: Hey, you want to go to a carnival tonight? Luke and I are headed to one.
Me: Luke and you? WTF?!?!? I thought you were into Kayden?
Callie: It’s not like that. We’re just friends. I helped him out with something today. And FYI, Kayden and I are just friends, too.
Me: Sure u r ;)
Callie: Le sigh.
Me: Don’t le sigh me, baby girl.
Callie: So, will u come? It should be fun. Plus, I really need u there. I know Luke’s cool and everything, but I still get nervous sometimes and Kayden’s going to be there, too. I’ll be the only girl.
Me: U know I’ll always b there for u.
Callie: Thanks :) You’re the best.
Me: Well, duh. That’s kind of a given. I think I’ll text Kayden and see if he wants a ride. I know he doesn’t have a car.
Callie: Sounds good. Text me when u get there.
I send Kayden a text and we make plans to ride over together. Stuffing my phone back in my pocket, I offer Greyson an apologetic look as I squeeze past people crowding the hall. “Sorry, but I can’t make it tonight.” When his smile falters, I feel like the worst person in the entire universe. Well, besides Kayden’s girlfriend, Daisy. That bitch is seriously evil. “I’d love to help you, but that was one of my friends on the phone. She needs my help with stuff,” I stumble over my words as his frown deepens into a full-on pout. “Carnival stuff.” As soon as I say it, I realize how stupid it sounded. “I swear to God, I’m not blowing you off. I just have this friend who has a hard time around guys and needs me to be there for her when she hangs out with the guy she likes.”
“Is it that girl you were with in the photos?” he asks, relaxing a tad.
“Yeah, she’s been through a lot and is always there for me. If it were anyone else, I would’ve said no. I promise.”
“No, it’s cool. I get it.” He pauses, stopping near the exit doors. “I actually promised a couple of my friends I’d go to the carnival with them sometime this week, so maybe I’ll head down tonight and we can meet up and hang out. Maybe ride the Ferris Wheel or something.”
“Ferris Wheel?” I arch my brow at him. “Isn’t that the one that takes forever to go around in a full circle? Like, the boringest ride ever?”
“What? I find it relaxing,” he says with this sexy half-grin. “Besides, it’s probably one of the best date rides ever because you get to spend all your time talking during the slow circle.”
He waits for me to agree that we should meet up. I know what agreeing would mean, that I’m deciding to open myself up again, to love, to heartache, to pain.
My heart thrashes in my chest as I surprise myself and nod. “Okay, I’ll see you there.”
He grins as he takes out his phone. “What’s your number? I’ll text you when I get there.”
I give him my phone number and he punches it into his contacts. Moments later, my phone vibrates from inside my pocket and I take it out.