He sat up, reaching for weapons that weren’t there. “What? What’s wrong?”
“You were shouting in your sleep. You woke me up.”
Alex rubbed a hand over his face and pushed sweaty hair out of his eyes. “Sorry.”
He heard Cass plop back on his bed. “Don’t worry about it. Go back to sleep. It’s way too early to run, even for you.”
Alex slowly lowered himself back down on the cot.
But he didn’t sleep.
14
SAGE WENT TO the sitting room before lessons, half hoping the queen hadn’t had a chance to present her idea to the king. Orianna looked up from her desk with a smile, then picked up the parchment she was writing on and waved it back and forth to dry the ink.
“I could’ve done that for you, Your Majesty,” Sage said. She couldn’t remember the queen writing anything since Sage had taken on duties as her secretary, not even personal letters.
“Not this time,” said Orianna smugly. “It’s a royal order designating you as Nicholas’s accompanying tutor. You couldn’t write that yourself.”
Sage’s mouth dropped open in shock. “His Majesty agreed?”
The queen shrugged. “Well, I didn’t specify whom I wanted to send.”
“You don’t think he’ll object when he learns?”
“I think he has weightier matters on his mind. I doubt he’ll notice.” Orianna set the parchment down and peered at her. “Don’t tell me you’re having second thoughts.”
“Well…” Truthfully, the anger that had driven Sage last night was gone, leaving only sorrow at the thought that Alex didn’t want her along. She should’ve returned to the garden and tried to talk to him again. Going behind his back like this was unforgivable. “What about Rose’s and Cara’s studies?” she said.
“Oh posh.” The queen set the note down and signed her name with a flourish. “They’ve advanced so much under you in the past year they can have a break. I’ll take them to Mondelea for a few weeks. We can visit Lady Gramwell—I’m impressed by how much Clare has learned under her. The girls could use some of the same lessons.”
Clare. Everything was nearly settled, and Sage hadn’t said anything to her best friend.
“Besides, I thought the plan was also to keep me informed as to what is really going on with this mission.” Orianna glanced back with raised eyebrows. “Yesterday we agreed that keeping me out of everything was both insulting and dangerous, didn’t we? You were particularly passionate about it last night.”
Sage nodded, but now the idea of working actively against Alex made her sick. Why hadn’t she thought this through?
Why hadn’t Alex just listened?
The queen pursed her lips at Sage’s silence. “If you’re thinking you’ve changed your mind, I’ll wait to send this order, but the girls and Nicholas already know. I told them at breakfast.” She rose and walked to stand in front of Sage, taking her shoulders in her hands. “But I’ve gotten very used to the idea of having your full and honest account of what is happening. Both Nicholas and Rose are old enough to be promised in marriage. I wasn’t concerned before, as there seemed to be no candidates or urgency, but opening talks with Casmun could change that.” Orianna’s blue-green eyes were pleading. “Don’t let this take me by surprise, Sage.”
Girls couldn’t be matched until they were sixteen, but anything without an official matchmaker was legal. Marriages outside the system were typically the very highest and lowest—either royalty or indentured peasantry. Rose was thirteen, and Sage often felt more like the princess’s older sister than her teacher. If that was what was at stake, there was no way she could abandon her.
“You may send the order, Your Majesty,” she said, then cringed that she’d just given a queen permission to do something.
Orianna kissed her on the forehead. “I won’t forget this, Sage.”
Now it was time to face Clare. Her friend was waiting for her in the schoolroom, idly flipping through a history book. Her posture told Sage she was angry, which meant she knew. Sage crossed the room and sat diagonally from her. Clare didn’t look up.
“I should have said something to you first,” Sage said timidly. “I’m sorry.”
“You should be. I came down here to be with you, and now you’re leaving.”
“I’m sorry,” Sage said again. “It happened so fast. I didn’t think it would really happen anyway.”
Clare shoved her book away. “I thought the one good thing about having to wait years to get married was being able to spend time with you, but apparently you’ll choose him over me even now.”
“That’s not true!” protested Sage. “This is about helping Her Majesty. I’d be going even if Alex wasn’t involved.”
Clare snorted. “Please, Sage. This is about proving yourself and getting back at him for lying to you last year.”
That was too close to yesterday’s thoughts for Sage’s comfort. She felt her cheeks redden.
“The thing is,” Clare continued, “you’re so busy trying to prove yourself to everyone, you don’t realize he’s the only one you don’t need to prove anything to.” She stood with quiet dignity. “The queen asked me to serve as her personal secretary in your absence, and there are all those documents to copy. So if you’ll excuse me, I have work to do.”
Sage stared at the empty chair. She’d never really had a friend until meeting Clare last year, and even then it had taken time for Clare to break through the walls Sage had erected around herself. Apparently, keeping a friend was as much work as making one. She put her head on her hands and sighed.
Rose and Carinthia arrived on time for lessons and pounced on Sage as soon as they came through the door. “We heard you’re leaving!” cried Carinthia, tears brimming in her wide hazel eyes.
“It’s only temporary,” Sage said wearily.
“What’s wrong?” said Rose, taking a nearby chair.
“Just tired. And actually wondering if I should go after all.”
Carinthia brightened. “Please stay! You’re the best teacher we’ve ever had!”
“Which is exactly why she should go.” Rose frowned at her younger sister. “Nicholas needs her more than we do right now. I think it’s wonderful.”
Sage shook her head. “I thought so, too, but…” She hesitated. Her arguments with Alex and Clare felt too raw and personal to share. “I just had so many plans for us,” she finished.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Rose said. Carinthia pouted from where she stood, but didn’t say anything.
“I know what you need,” said Rose, rising to her feet and tugging Sage’s hand.
15
THE PRINCESSES PRACTICALLY dragged Sage out of the schoolroom and down the passage and several flights of stairs. In one of the workshops on the lower levels, Eleanor Draper listened as Rose explained how Sage would be tutoring the prince while he was in the field with the army. When Rose finished, the seamstress ordered Sage to strip to her undergarments and stand on the small platform in the center of the room before disappearing.
Even Carinthia was getting into the spirit as she and Rose helped Sage undress. Rose leaned in to whisper while Cara laid Sage’s dress over a chair. “You must go, Sage, for my sake. I am trapped here at the palace, sewing and dancing and smiling sweetly when I want to scratch someone’s face, but you can have an adventure, just like in the storybooks.”
Sage looked at her student, realizing for the first time that Rose didn’t watch her in the tilting yards and constantly ask about Sage’s earlier life out of curiosity or boredom. She envied her, yet Sage had never seen a definite sign of it until now. She clasped the younger girl’s hands and nodded. “I will,” she said. “And when I get back I’ll talk to your parents about expanding your education outside of the schoolroom, if only a little.”