Help me! I want to live with you. I have absolutely nothing. I have two children. One son is two years old, and the other is five years old.
I was frantic; I didn’t have enough money to send to her at the rate I was working, so I immediately looked for another job and found one as a cleaner in a place near Tokyo Tower. I worked there for one month, long days from five a.m. to one a.m., and as soon as I received my pay, I went to the Tokyo post office to send her one hundred thousand yen. Later, I received a letter from Ho-son. He informed me that she had died of starvation. She was in her late twenties. The money I sent was too late to help her. I last heard from Ho-son in 1998; the last news he sent was that Ho-chol was looking for work in a coal-mining area with his four children. Then the letters abruptly stopped. I haven’t slept more than a few hours at a time since then. I still hope to rescue my remaining children. It is a terrible curse to not even know if they are still alive. But I believe they are. I have to believe so; otherwise, I couldn’t go on.
I often think about what would have become of me if I’d stayed in North Korea. I would probably have starved too. But at least I’d have died in someone’s arms with my family gathered around me. We’d have said our goodbyes. What chance of that now?
People talk about God. Although I can’t see him myself, I still pray for a happy ending.