I want to be able to set down my backpack without fear of a shopkeeper yelling at me for stealing a loaf of bread. I want to change my clothes in a room other than a public bathroom. I want to take off my shoes and know I am home.
Instead, I am in alone. In Alaska. In the fucking wilderness.
Finding a clearing, I sit down on a boulder and rest. Reaching for a bottle of water, I try to remain calm. Drinking half of it, I roll my shoulders back—trying to focus on the fact I’m alive and intelligent. I’ve gotten this far— I can do the next part too. Whatever that is.
Through the trees, I see a flash of fur. For a moment I think maybe the guys have shifted to wolves and have come for me. I’m preparing myself to go off on them again when the bear from last night crashes through the clearing.
Immediately, my entire body is charged. Shoulders, legs, feet, fists. There’s no way in hell this beast is going to get another chance to bite me. No way in hell.
I crouch down, ready to take her on. The fire in my belly grows and the ground seems to quake. The forest rumbles, matching the way I feel inside, the same way I felt before I lashed out against Ray. Angry and alone and threatened. I feel like the orphan girl I’ve never forgotten—me against the world. This bear is not going to win. Hell no.
Instead of retreating, I’m compelled to lunge for her. I want to attack a big ass bear. What the hell is going on with me?
I leap forward and as I do my skin begins to morph, change before my eyes, my legs begin to shake as they transform. Grey fur emerges as I whip my fists toward the bear, my fingers change too, claws come out and my face morphs, my nose suddenly keenly aware of the animals around me, and my eyes zoom in on the bear’s presence. My body… it shifts.
I am a wolf.
And I am fucking furious.
Growling with all my might at the bear, I rip at her, wanting her to feel the pain I’ve always carried. The trauma of having no one and being forgotten. For being pushed aside and left out. I lash at the bear, directing all my anger, all my rage at her.
Maybe it’s misplaced—but she started this fight.
Now I will finish it. My claws rip at her.
Blood coats her black coat, glistening in the midday sun as I pounce. She seems to have stopped fighting back. Instead, she whimpers, not a growl. She pulls back, practically running away. And I run after her, wanting her to know exactly how I feel—but she is gone, moving faster and knowing this forest better than I.
I look around, having found myself near a river, and I dip my head into the stream of water.
And that’s when I begin to hyperventilate. For the record, when you’re a wolf and you hyperventilate, it’s displayed in a strange way. One second I’m drinking water from the river—lapping it up with my actual tongue— and the next I’m on my belly, head buried in my paws.
Yes, paws. Because I’m a wolf.
Or something.
What did those motherfuckers do to me last night?
I don’t know how to get out of this form and return to Remedy.
I lift my head, trying to slow my breathing, and from this low spot on the forest floor, I see sunlight trickling through the branches, the water burbling down the river, the birds overhead taking flight—and I feel and hear it all. Everything around me is heightened. And for a moment I wonder if maybe it’s better this way. Maybe living as a wolf is better than being Remedy, girl on the run. Maybe this shift solves all my problems. Like every single one of them. Except you know, the no longer being human part.
Alone in my thoughts, I don’t notice at first that I’m surrounded.
This time though, it isn’t the mama bear coming after me.
It’s the wolves. All three of them.
And they stare at me, and deep inside I can sense that something has changed. Something vital.
They look at me, in wolf form, and I know what I am.
Theirs.
Chapter 10
Callum
With my eyes on hers, I communicate for all of us men. If we all start talking at once it will overwhelm her.
Don’t freak out.
Are you nuts? Look at me, I’m a wolf. What did you do to me?
You can shift back. Just listen.
I didn’t ask for this. What did you do to me?
It wasn’t something we did. It was fate.
Fate had a role in this? Because from the looks of things you did this to me. Why?
Calm down, Rem. You can shift by closing your eyes and imagining yourself in human form.
It’s not working. My eyes are closed and, yet I still have a fucking tail.
Your tail’s cute, by the way.
No, no flirting, Callum. I’m not doing that.
Doing what?
I just want to be…
I step closer to her, not wanting to scare her away.
You just want to be what, Rem?
She looks into my eyes, her dark fur so beautiful, with a red streak starting between her eyes, running the length of her, down her tail. Her eyes are the same fiery dark pools as in human form. But as a wolf, she seems more vulnerable; she doesn’t know how to protect herself in animal form. As a woman, she knows what it means to survive—but as a predator in the wild, it’s an entirely different game. And she must sense the change.
We need to get her someplace safe. Now it’s more urgent than ever.
I just want to feel safe. Like I did in the cave, with you guys. Before you got here now, the bear came back. We fought, and I remembered how alone I felt in the tent last night. How I am tired of feeling like that. And I don’t know what’s happening, but Callum, don’t leave me alone. Don’t let me run. I need… I need…
Us.
She nods.
Close your eyes, Rem, and focus on your mates keeping you safe.
She closes her eyes, and so do the guys and I. Then, as a breeze passes overhead, we move from animal to man. Standing on our own two feet.
She collapses, tears on her cheeks. “What the fuck is happening?”
We step toward her, knowing if the other information sent her running, what we need to tell her now might scare her off completely.
“Listen,” I say, taking her hands in mine. The fact that she lets me, eases the tension building between my shoulder blades. “I know we just met. But like we told you this morning, wolves mate for life.”
“Right,” she says, looking us over warily. “And that made me turn into a wolf?”
I shake my head. “No, that didn’t.”
Her eyes cloud over with confusion and East steps forward, taking one of her hands in his own. “Human women who mate with wolf-shifters are given the power to shift themselves, when they…” he exhales, squinting, and looking at River for backup.
River nods, and with a raised brow tell Remedy the truth. “When they get pregnant.”
Remedy snorts. “Pregnant?” She raises her hands in defense, clearly in flight mode. “Not possible. We had sex less than twenty-four hours ago. It’s too early.”
I speak up, “Maybe it’s too early for a human child but, Rem, you aren’t carrying a human baby. And since you slept with all of us last night, your child is one part of all of us.”
She shakes her head, pressing her hands to her flat stomach. Tears in her eyes. “Not possible. I can’t… I’m not…”