The Girl Who Dared to Endure (The Girl Who Dared #6)

“Oh, that’s perfect,” I said with a sigh, relaxing further into his hands as he found a particularly sore spot and quickly removed the ache with a few strong rubs of his thumbs. This was okay—a distraction in the form of some much-needed pain relief. Besides, it didn’t hurt that he did it so well… Which made me wonder how he knew how to do it in the first place. “Is this Leo or Grey?” I asked, curious.

“One hundred percent human,” he replied, and I smiled, realizing I was talking to Grey.

“Hey,” I said with a smile. Then I frowned, realizing I hadn’t touched base with him once since everything had started to gain momentum. Undoubtedly, he was nervous, considering this would be the first time he and Leo were in a combat situation together since he woke up, and I felt bad that I hadn’t taken the time to make sure he was handling it okay. “I haven’t had a moment to ask how you were holding up with all of this. Everything came together really fast.”

“I’m… nervous,” he admitted. “But I know Leo can handle a fight if things get too crazy. Besides, I should be asking you how you’re holding up. You seem tense.”

He hit another stiff muscle, and I bit back a groan as his thumb stroked over it. “And the award for understatement of the year goes to…”

I trailed off and was rewarded by a soft chuckle from Grey. “I suppose you’re right. I feel like I was asleep for months, when in reality it was just a couple of weeks. A lot went down without me. And what’s worse, you had to do all of it alone. You have every right to be stressed.”

“I wasn’t alone,” I said immediately. “I had the others.”

He snorted. “That’s not the same, and you know it. You shoulder everything. The responsibility is enormous, and it’s all fallen squarely on you. I can only imagine how hard it’s been—every step back, every deviation, every loss…”

I sniffled, his words hitting too close to home, touching a nerve that I’d done my best to keep hidden from everyone. Pain flooded me, not only from the idea that I was going to lose the others, but from the sheer amount of stress I had been under for the past few weeks. Grey knew—he understood. I hadn’t been able to talk about it with anyone else because it didn’t seem fair. If I was frustrated with one of them, and started venting to someone else, then it would just create a bad environment. And if I was constantly expressing my doubts and fears to them, it would be toxic to our little group.

But holding it in had been toxic to me. Now Grey was back, and it was like he knew exactly what to say to draw the truth out of me.

“I feel out of my mind half the time,” I told him, giving my thoughts freedom. “I worry about everything and everyone, and… Scipio help me, I’ve gotten so paranoid not knowing who to trust. There’s this one Knight, an old friend of my mother’s. I’ve known her my entire life, and I have no idea whose side she’s on. I still don’t really know if I can trust her!”

I paused, taking a moment to realize what I had just said. Even with a potential end in sight, I was still doubting those around me. We had Sadie’s files. We had discovered her conspiracy with Plancett and had DNA evidence confirming Dreyfuss’s role in all this, as well as Eric witnessing the exchange between the two of them. I should have been more confident, but all I could feel was anxiety that I was missing someone, something, somewhere. And I couldn’t help it as the truth spilled out of me.

“Even now, I can’t help but feel like I’ve missed something or someone important, or that all of this is going to wind up to be a huge setup, somehow. The legacies have been ninety bajillion steps ahead of us the entire time. I just can’t seem to believe that this is going to work!”

“Hey,” he said, his arms coming around my side to pull me tight to his chest, tethering me to him. “It’s okay. I promise you, it’s going to be okay. Let’s think it through logically and see if maybe you did miss something. I don’t think that you did, but maybe it will make you feel better. Let’s see… You got all of the information from Sadie’s computer on how many were in her legacy group and about… half that group’s placements in various departments, right?”

“Right,” I agreed, curious as to where he was going. “The spy legacies.”

“Yes, well, Sadie could know that you took those, but her lack of action tells me that she bought your cover story. I mean, that was really sensitive information, but given the measures you and Leo took, she has no reason to believe it’s been stolen. If she thought it had, surely she would have reacted by now.”

I bit my lip. It was a fair point—unless, of course, they somehow knew what we were up to and were using it as a trap to lure us in. What better way to eliminate your enemy than by drawing them in to a fight that could get them killed?

“It could be a trick,” I said.

“Maybe, but this didn’t just come from Sadie’s files. You got the blood tests from both the Medica, and then later from Lacey and Strum. The location for the undoc side of the legacies came from Liam. I mean, it’s not like all of it came from Sadie’s files. A lot of it, yes, like Dr. Smiley, but you had to fit the pieces together to understand it in its entirety, and much of that information was given by multiple sources. If it’s a trick, then it’s one that required a lot more foresight then I think they had time for.”

My mouth tightened in automatic disbelief. He was right, but I couldn’t seem to get my nerves to agree. All I could think was that if we missed even one legacy—if we let one get away—then all of this could start again. He or she could try to rescue their people before they were executed, or finish whatever plan they had for Scipio before we had a chance to fix him. “I don’t know… It just feels like… It’s so much so fast. I don’t trust it.”

“Or it’s the result of your investigative work finally paying off,” he said, and I could hear a tinge of exasperation in his voice. “Look, I’m not going to lie. Is there a chance that you were noticed collecting the DNA, or that Sadie somehow figured out that you stole her files? Absolutely. Of course. But I don’t think so. I don’t think so, because every move that’s taken you closer to them has put them off balance, and forced them to react to you, instead of working on whatever it is they’re planning. Every step you’ve made has been logical, and the risks you took were calculated. There is no reason for you to doubt anything, and doing so is a waste of your beautiful mind.”

His words were like a balm to my ravaged soul, and it was only the tight confines of the shaft that prevented me from turning around in his arms and showing him exactly how much better he had made me feel. I was still scared, but finally giving voice to those fears helped tremendously.

“You always know the perfect thing to say,” I said, resting my arm over his and threading our fingers together.

“That’s because I’m perfect,” he shot back, and I bit back a laugh at the pained quality of his voice. “It’s my burden to bear.”

I snorted. “Scipio help me, I have no idea how you fit both your ego and Leo’s in that head of yours.”

“Well, it helps that we have similar interests,” he replied in a hungry voice, and pleasure curled through me when I realized he—they?—were referring to me. Heat bloomed in my cheeks, and I ducked my head, suddenly feeling weird. It was nice that Grey seemed to have a handle on sharing his body with Leo, but I still wasn’t as confident that this could work, even with him insisting that it could. Two minds in one body? It was a recipe for jealousy and pettiness, no matter what Grey or Leo said.

“I still can’t get over how at ease you are with all of this,” I told him, unable to keep it back. Maddox’s voice buzzed in my ear, notifying me that two more teams had gotten into position, and I paused to make sure we weren’t about to move.

We weren’t, much to my relief.

“If I were you, I’d be hurt and angry.”

“You’re not me,” he interjected softly. “Leo’s not me, either, and he’s just as confused as you are.”

“Well, I’m not confused, just… I have a lot of doubts,” I admitted. “How can you not feel betrayed?”