And when the guy did it, he did it to the extreme.
That was until the day he’d found his wife, Willow, and realized there were better things to be living for.
Ash pulled me in for a hug, clapping me on the back. “Fuck, man, you scared the shit out of me.”
I clapped him back. “All’s good, man.”
From over his shoulder, Anthony, Sunder’s manager, caught my eye. Worry was written across every line of his face, the guy brimming with questions and concern.
Because when something happened to one of us? It affected all of us.
Protecting us was Anthony’s job. The crazy thing was he didn’t do it out of obligation or for a paycheck. He did it because he cared. He was no less a member of this mismatched family than any one of us.
Back before Sunder had made it, when the band was only beginning and was still made up of Mark, Sebastian who everyone called Baz, Lyrik, and Ash, Anthony had been at a show and seen the raw talent they possessed.
He’d taken them on as their manager, and stood by them through thick and thin.
Through all the bullshit trouble Lyrik and Baz had gotten themselves into during the early days of the band.
Through the tragedy of the band finding my brother, Mark, OD’ed on their tour bus and me stepping in to take his place.
He’d been there when the brutal truth of Mark’s death had come out.
My guts clenched in regret and the gratitude I would always, always have for Anthony. Because Anthony was the only one who knew. He knew what I’d done. He knew what I had destroyed. He knew I was responsible.
Of course he’d tried to convince me everyone made mistakes. That everything was forgivable if you were truly sorry you committed the sin.
I knew better.
In the end, when I was adamant I was going through with it, he’d been the one who had facilitated the paperwork and the agreements so I could get away with my lies and live these two lives. Each of them flimsy and hinging on my ability to keep one from spilling into the other. Otherwise that dam would overflow and everything would go crashing down.
Which was why I did my best to lay low in a world where I’d always be in the limelight. Keeping quiet and behind the scenes. Keeping my actions on the straight and narrow so there’d be nothing to get the paps talking and digging.
Wasn’t all that hard for a drummer, anyway.
Ash stepped back, still hanging on to me by the outside of my shoulders and looking me up and down. Like he was making sure I was still in one piece.
Like I said, I didn’t exactly have the reputation of a fighter. Didn’t mean I couldn’t hold my own.
Ash looked me square. “What the fuck happened, man?”
I flexed my fists, stretching out my knuckles that were beat to hell. Scabs were beginning to form on the torn up skin. “I went to go visit an old friend. Was walking home and heard a girl calling for help. Just did what I had to do.”
Incredulous, his brow rose. “You went to visit an old friend…in the middle of the night…on the shittiest side of town? That’s some stupid shit, dude. You know better than that. And what friend was so important?”
This was the part I hated—misleading the guys. Making them believe I was someone I was not.
I kept my answers as vague and boring as possible. “Just someone I knew back in high school. It wasn’t a big deal until I walked up on the shit that was definitely a big deal.”
“So you jumped in.” Ash said it like he was proud.
“Yeah.” Like I’d do anything else.
A smirk kicked up on his mouth, the one the dude just loved to wear. “Look at that, our little Zee Kennedy, stepping into the ring. Never thought I’d see the day.”
There was nothing little about me, but it sure as hell was the stigma I’d always worn. Mark’s younger brother who’d stepped into his big brother’s shoes that never quite fit.
It was easier that way, pretending I didn’t want anything else.
Needing to get the attention off myself, I turned it on him and shot him a wry smile. “Watch yourself, asshole. At least it wasn’t me getting my ass kicked.”
Enough time had passed that I could tease him about the pack of assholes who’d attacked him and left him for dead more than a year ago back in Savannah.
“Ouch,” he inflected with about as much feigned offense as he could find. “That’s a low blow, man. A low, downright, dirty blow. That shit was five against one. Pussies. Every last one of them. But hey, what’s that they say? You’ve gotta wade through the shit to get to the good waiting on the other side? And I’d gladly wade through shit every day of my life if it brought me to my Willow.”
I lifted a brow. “I’m pretty sure no one said that except for you.”
He lifted his hulking, tattooed arms out to the side in that over-the-top, cocky way. “What can I say? I’m wise beyond my years. Quote that shit.”
My laughter was incredulous. “What you are is ridiculous.”
His phone rang from his pocket and he dug it out. “Speaking of Willow, I’d better take this. If you thought I was freaked out over this, wait until you see her. Just warning you, man, you’re in so much trouble. Prepare yourself to be mom’ed right after I convince her you are, in fact, okay.”
“Oh, shit,” I muttered, roughing a hand through my hair as a flash of affection pulsed at my chest.
All the girls were the best. Doting on us, covering us in all their love and support. Especially me, considering I was the only one not paired up, the permanent bachelor in this family that’d grown with each passing year.
Every single one of the guys had gotten damned lucky, that was for sure.
Ash grinned. “Tell me you don’t love my woman taking care of you.”
I widened my eyes. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”
Truth was, I loved Willow to pieces.
He was chuckling under his breath when he accepted her call and paced away to talk to her.
As soon as he did, Anthony closed the space between us, his head angled and his voice lowered to keep the conversation between us.
“What happened out there, Zee? This isn’t good. Paps are talking about it. Of course because they love to twist it to fit into whatever they want to see, they’re pegging it as some sort of brawl over a girl, claiming you have some secret lover.”
“Shit,” I hissed beneath my breath. I shook my head and fought against another rush of that rage that flooded my nerves.
I eyed Anthony seriously, gritting my teeth. “She sold the house, man. I went over there last night and found the new owner there instead of her. Now she’s living a half mile down the street from where we’d gotten her out of in the first place.”
He reared back an inch, anger tightening his jaw. “Goddamn it. And the money?”
I shrugged through the resentment. “Gone.”