My fellows in magery.
And my very first student.
I might have lost my magic, but I hadn’t lost my place in their world after all.
Then the closest troll—a troll I thought I recognized from my first day here—turned and lifted one foot high behind Lord Ihlmere.
A beam of white light flashed out from the elf’s hands...
...And that massive foot stepped down on him with a bone-splitting CRUNCH.
I swallowed down bile as the white light vanished, quenched at the same moment as its owner.
A sigh rippled through the company of elves. I heard retching noises from a few of the humans around me.
The elven king looked on calmly as the troll stepped back, leaving a crumpled white pile before him on the snowy ground.
“Rest in peace, my old enemy,” the king said in ancient Densk.
Then he looked up with a cool, diplomatic smile.
“Well,” he said to Lady Cosgrave in perfect Anglish. “Shall we begin our ceremony?”
15
The rest of the ceremony passed without incident. As the clouds above us gradually parted and the snowfall outside our bubble slowed from a thick flurry to a mist, the representatives of the Boudiccate and the elven court traded and received their traditional greetings and reassurances in the sing-song tones of ancient ritual.
When the solstice sun hit its highest point, shining weakly from a pale blue sky, the very last snowflakes fell with a sigh outside our protected gathering.
The storm was over at long last.
“May we tempt Your Majesty to stay and join us for a Solstice Feast?” Lady Cosgrave asked at the very end, as the elves stepped back to take their leave. “It may not measure up to the famous delicacies of your own court, but...”
“We thank you,” said the elven king, “but we must return. It has been too long since we partook of a great hunt.” His silver eyes glittered as he spoke those words, and a hiss of anticipation sounded from his gathered courtiers.
It sparked something primeval in my spine—something that remembered a time, not so long ago, when humans had been favored elven prey.
I fought the sudden, cowardly urge to sidle backwards.
The elven king’s icy gaze passed over our assembled company and landed with the weight of inevitability upon me. “There is,” he murmured, “still the question of a new ambassadress from your nation. Perhaps we might finally agree upon one who is accustomed to speaking freely to elves...and understanding our own words even in the most perilous of circumstances.”
My stomach clenched.
“Why, yes,” said Lady Cosgrave brightly, taking another step toward him. “In fact, my own young cousin, Miss Fennell, has developed quite an interest in your court, as you may have gathered from her earlier contributions! She would make an excellent addition to your company. Or—”
“Forgive me, ma’am.” Miss Fennell gave an apologetic smile to her cousin and a deep, respectful bow to the elven king. “Under other circumstances, I would be honored beyond words by such an appointment...but I’m afraid I’m rather urgently needed here at the moment.”
Her hand closed around Miss Banks’s arm, and the two of them leaned into each other in a moment of perfect harmony.
But I couldn’t enjoy it even for their sake as the elven king’s lips curved into a smile of dangerous satisfaction...and his gaze remained firmly fixed on me.
“I am no diplomat.” My voice came out half-strangled. “I would be a terrible ambassadress, Your Highness.”
“And yet,” purred the elven king, “I do see why Lord Ihlmere found you intriguing.” His eyes narrowed, and his voice dropped to a silken croon that tugged underneath my skin. “You’ve lost your own magic, haven’t you? I can see it locked into your bones, unreachable...at least, as long as you remain in this outer world.” His smile deepened. “Our magic works differently than yours, you know...and so do the forces of nature within our hills. If you tasted the mysteries of our hidden court, you might yet be surprised by what possibilities you could discover...but only while you remained with us.”
My magic. The possibility shot through me like a jolt of lightning, every inch of me from the nape of my neck to my gloved fingertips suddenly tingling with alertness.
It was the impossible dream that had consumed me for the last four months, even after I’d told myself that I had given up hope. It was the single, overriding goal that I had spent my entire life fighting to achieve.
I could almost taste the power flowing through me once again. It was so amazing—so miraculous—I felt a sob of pure wonder try to break its way out from my throat.
I’d have to give up everything to achieve it—but when had I not happily sacrificed everything else in my life for the pursuit of magic?
As my head whirled, I wrenched my gaze away from the elven king, taking one last look at the human semicircles around me before I gave my answer.
Amy’s eyes were huge with shock, but her lips curved into a wobbling smile as I met her gaze, and her chin dipped into a tiny nod of acceptance.
Jonathan frowned, folding his arms across his chest, but he didn’t speak.
Wrexham’s dark eyes held all his heart...and then he took a deep, shuddering breath and took a firm step backwards, away from me.
...Letting me go at last.
My family and my lover had always allowed me to make my own choices in the end. And I had never hidden from anyone in my life the truth of where my priorities lay.
So I stood on my own for the first time that day as I gave the elven king a deep and heartfelt bow. “I am truly honored by your invitation, Your Majesty,” I said, “but I cannot—no,” I corrected myself firmly, “I will not accept it.”
I wouldn’t use anyone else as a shield for me this time. This was my decision, mine alone, and my moment: the moment, after all those months of pain and despair, to finally step away for good from the wreckage of my past dreams and stride into a new and different future.
I’d thought I’d lost everything four months ago. But in the months since then, I’d discovered even deeper priorities after all...and shining new possibilities.
The elven king’s eyebrows rose. The elf-lords around him stiffened.
“I have important work to do here,” I explained, keeping my chin raised and my gaze unyielding, “and people I love far too dearly to leave behind.”
“Ah.” The elven king let out a hissing sigh and gave an infinitesimal shrug. “A pity, that. But if the Boudiccate has no other appropriate candidates to suggest...”
“Ahem.” Standing in the inner semicircle, old Mrs. Seabury planted her walking stick in the snow before her like a statement of its own. “Your Majesty.” Her wrinkled brown face creased into a wicked smile. “I believe you’ll find I can speak my mind...and I have a reasonable understanding, too.”