Slouch Witch (The Lazy Girl's Guide to Magic, #1)

‘We wait until Price comes out then we follow him at a safe distance.’

I considered this. ‘And what if he just goes home?’

‘Then we stake out his house until he makes another move.’

‘But that could be days.’

‘If that’s what it takes to bring this bastard down, Ivy, that’s what we’ll do.’

Winter might be happy to sit around waiting for Price to do something but I couldn’t be arsed. Deciding I had a much better idea – and that it probably wouldn’t appeal to my grumpy partner – I nodded my head. ‘Well, I think I’ll go grab a nap. I want to be fresh and alert for when he puts his newfound magic into action.’ I pointed towards the wine bar. ‘Unless he’s already persuaded the poor owner of this dump to jump to his every whim and we’re too late.’

Winter peered in through the windows. ‘He’s just having a drink. There’s hardly anyone else in there. I think we’re safe for now.’ He said all this with a completely straight face, as if it were possible that Price was going to take over England by subjugating one wine bar at a time. He looked back at me. ‘Do you seriously need to nap?’

‘Oh yes.’ I bobbed my head vigorously. ‘We can take turns. You can rest later.’ Before he could point out that this was a silly idea, I jogged back to my taxi and slid into the driver’s seat. I slumped down as if getting comfortable, aware that Winter was still watching me. It was touch and go whether I’d get away with this but, when he marched across the road to take up position in an alleyway, I reckoned I’d succeeded. It was for the best. I didn’t want to have to trail after Price for days. Or even hours. Winter would thank me later.

I didn’t have long to wait. I was just getting comfortable, with my eyes drifting closed, when Price’s weedy figure emerged from the bar. I sat bolt upright, hastily clipped on my seatbelt and flipped on my taxi-for-hire light. Price glanced one way up the street then the other, caught sight of me and raised his arm. I mentally high-fived myself.

‘Ivy,’ I whispered, ‘Winter was right. You are a sodding genius.’

I put the taxi into gear and indicated, driving the short distance to where Price was waiting. With the dark night and my bright headlights, he wouldn’t get the chance to see who I was until it was too late.

Price clambered in the back. ‘Willowbrook Lane,’ he grunted. ‘And I know the route like the back of my hand so don’t try the long way round.’

I waited a beat for him to recognise me. When all he did was settle into his seat and look out the window, my grin widened. ‘Absolutely, sir,’ I murmured. I caught sight of Winter’s pale face as he stepped out from the shadows and stared as I drove off. I gave him a tiny nod. Work smarter, not harder. He’d learn.

It didn’t appear that Price’s little sojourn and tipple had done anything to relax him. The bruises under his eyes were even more pronounced and he kept twisting his fingers in his lap. He was acting like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders – or a very guilty conscience.

I was debating my next move when Price’s phone rang. His expression contorted in a grimace but he still answered it. ‘Yeah?’

I kept my eyes on the road but my focus was on Price. Was he speaking to an accomplice? Maybe I’d get all the evidence I needed without having to do more than drive around for a bit. I might even get lucky and he’d give me a tip.

‘I can’t do that, Mother,’ Price hissed. ‘I don’t have time.’

He paused as whoever was speaking to him replied. Whatever they were saying, it didn’t please him in the slightest. ‘I’ve got people breathing down my neck in all directions. And no, not just the Ipsissimus. I’ve got a bunch of idiots working for me, all of whom make it very clear that they despise me. That Villeneuve fellow completely fucked up and sent some First Level to the back of beyond, causing no end of trouble that I got the blame for. It was hardly my fault that he messed up. No one understands the stress I’m under.’

His caller said something but, despite straining my ears, all I could hear was an indistinct murmur.

‘Don’t you think I’ve tried that?’ Price half yelled, half whined. ‘They won’t listen to anything I say! I’m at my wits’ end. Even the bloody receptionist throws daggers when she thinks I can’t see. She’s been letting almost anyone in through the door as if she doesn’t care, and she laughed in my face when I tried to talk to her about it this morning. They’re a bunch of lazy incompetents. I’ve had enough. I don’t want this any more. I’m thinking of quitting.’ There was a pause. ‘I don’t care if other witches don’t quit! I’ve had enough!’ He jabbed viciously at a button on the phone and tossed it down beside him.

I wrinkled my nose. Shrugging, I put plan B into action and indicated right when I should have gone left. Despite his earlier warning, it took Price a few moments to realise what I’d done. I was already down a darkened street and heading in the opposite direction out of town when it finally dawned on him that we weren’t going to his home.

‘Hey!’ he protested, sitting forward. ‘I told you, no funny business! Where are we?’

‘Taking a short cut,’ I said cheerfully, watching him in the mirror. On this road and at this time of night, it was unlikely I’d have to worry about oncoming traffic. I needed to keep my eyes on my new captive.

Price blinked. ‘You’re a woman?’

‘You only just noticed?’ Not that I should be surprised, given what I already knew of the man.

He stared at the back of my head then into the mirror at my reflection. ‘I know you,’ he said slowly.

‘Yes. You do.’ I smiled.

His eyes shifted and he started to reach into his pocket. Taking one hand off the steering wheel, I drew a rune that made his seatbelt tighten. It yanked him backwards, constricting his movements. ‘What the hell do you think you’re doing?’ he screamed. ‘Let me go!’ He jerked wildly against the belt, panic guiding his movements. With his hands still free, he belatedly realised that he could still cast a spell against me. The fingers on his right hand began to draw, a sluggish rune designed to hurt. I responded by magicking up a barrier, which his spell fell against uselessly. His mouth dropped open. ‘What the hell was that?’

‘Something I’ve been working on for a while,’ I told him. In truth, I hadn’t been sure it would work against higher-level spells. Price really had been promoted beyond his abilities. My barrier wouldn’t hold against another spell, though, regardless of how weak it was. He didn’t need to know that. ‘Try anything again,’ I threatened, ‘and you’ll be sorry.’

Fear flared in his eyes and he did nothing to disguise it. ‘Let me out! Stop this car and let me out, you bitch!’

‘What is it with the word bitch?’ I enquired.

Price was too busy screaming to hear me. ‘Let me out! Let me out! Let me out!’