In the shadows cast by her wings he took hold of her shoulders and pulled her back. “Isis. Isis, look at me.”
When she finally did, he said, “The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but we can’t. I can’t. No matter what I feel. No matter how strong our bond. It isn’t allowed.”
Tears filled her eyes. “You . . . you don’t, then.”
He held her face in his hands, using his thumbs to wipe away her tears, and cursed under his breath. “I’m sorry. You don’t know how much I wish . . . Look. You won’t be alone. I’ll always be with you. I promise you.”
“It won’t be the same.”
“No, it won’t.”
“I didn’t know how painful this would be.”
“Then I’ll stop talking about what I can’t be and tell you what I can be, okay?”
Isis nodded slightly, tears still spilling down her cheeks.
“I can be your friend,” he said as he trailed his fingers down a lock of her hair. “I can be your protector.” Hugging her close, he murmured in her ear, “I will be your confidant and secret keeper.” He kissed her wet cheek. “I’ll be your ally.” Moving to her other cheek, he added, “I’ll be your advocate.”
Touching his forehead to hers, he was about to add something else when she interrupted, “But you won’t be my beloved.”
He froze and stepped back. She lifted her stormy eyes to his, pinning him in place. “We won’t seek out stolen moments in your garden or laugh together about memories only the two of us share. We won’t tumble in each other’s arms as we roll down a hillside. We won’t discover together what it truly means to devote ourselves entirely to the well-being of one another. Or understand a love so powerful we’re willing to cling to it by our fingertips like Geb and Nut.
“You won’t comfort me with kisses or soothing caresses when I’m sad or tired. I won’t know that you seek out my face above all others. Or be able to claim you as my own. But worst of all, you won’t hold me in your arms every night as we retire together after a long day, a long decade, or a long century of work. You’re relegating me, us, to a very long life of limited potential, of not knowing, of undiscovering. So I ask you again, my love, are you sure this half-life is what you want?”
Isis gazed into his troubled eyes and slid her hands around his broad shoulders, threading her fingers together around his neck. Never in her life had she wanted something so badly. Being on the verge of obtaining it, and knowing that it could at any moment be lost to her forever, was a heady, frightening experience—one she’d never had before—and one she wouldn’t trade for anything.
Shaking his head slightly, he began, “Isis, I want—” but he cut himself off and just looked at her. What Isis saw in the depths of his eyes made her pulse quicken. Their bodies were locked together. His lips were tantalizingly close to hers.
Held captive by the soft press of her wings against his back and the allure of her lips, he lowered his head to hers and nuzzled her ear, trying desperately to convince himself that he could stop at any time. That he still hadn’t gone so far he couldn’t pull back. But once he’d caught the scent of her hair, caressed the softness of her skin, and felt the supple length of her body against his, he was lost.
His lips branded a fiery trail from her temple down the curve of her jaw. Isis moaned softly and rocked against him, tilting her head back to grant him access to her throat, closing her eyes to savor the sensation of his lips on her skin. This was what she’d wanted. This was what she craved. A man who would love her wholly and completely. One who would be her companion forever. A man who would share in her sorrow as well as in her joy.
Slowly, achingly, he made his way from her neck back up the side of her face, and just as she was anticipating his kiss, he drew away. The hands that held her trembled. His jaw was set at a hard angle, his mouth in a grim line.
Finally, he opened his eyes. They were filled with pain and regret. “I’m sorry, Little One. You don’t know how sorry I am.” With that, he spun and disappeared, leaving a cold emptiness where his body had just been.
Isis drew her wings around herself, trying to contain the heat of this passionate moment, but it trickled away until she was left with nothing but loss.
The next morning he was gone.
It had been a year since she’d seen him, a short time by godly standards, but she’d felt each day of separation as if it were a tiny ache carved into her soul. And now he’d returned, and despite everything that had happened, Isis was more certain than ever that the love she felt was real and true. It was a gift from the stars, not to be refuted or squandered.
Isis touched down lightly on the marble balcony and tucked her wings behind her. She raced through the halls and porticoes, searching but not finding, until at last she discovered him. He stood in a room, alone, his back to her as he glanced through Amun-Ra’s latest list of concerns and duties.
The sight of him filled her with a strange giddiness coupled with anxiety. She’d waited for him for a long year—the longest one in her memory. And she wouldn’t be denied this moment, this reunion. Isis had tamped down the flames of her love until it smoldered slowly, quietly, like hot embers. But seeing him again stoked the fire, reigniting it until it burned hotly in her breast, threatening to incinerate anything that dared to stand in its way.
He must not have heard her approach because he didn’t turn, not until she said his name, the name she’d whispered in her dreams.
Osiris.
Chapter 2
Cultivating
Osiris spun toward her. The papyrus he’d been looking at crackled in his hand from the weight of his fingers tightening around it. “Isis,” he said simply.
She took a step toward him but he backed up.
His long legs hit the table, causing it to shift noisily, the grating sound a reflection of the slightly pained expression that crossed his face.
The glow that had come naturally from the happiness she felt upon seeing him slowly melted along with her hope. Clearing her throat, Isis said, “You’ve returned. Will you be home for long?”
“No,” he answered, moving away from her and smoothing the wrinkled papers on the table. “My plan is to leave as soon as Amun-Ra approves the new plans I’ve designed.”
“May I see them?” Isis asked. Her interest was piqued despite the fact that he appeared to be uncomfortable within her presence.
“Surely the great goddess Isis has better things to do than to muck about in the affairs of mortals.”
Isis stiffened, her wings rustling in response to her irritation. “And just what is it that you think I do with my time exactly?”