I fly up to Sunshine Meadows with wings on my feet. Well, I drive, in my clapped-out Mazda, but that doesn’t sound nearly as wonderful. It’s a glorious day. The sort of day that we should all stop what we’re doing and head to the beach. The sort of day where we should eat fish and chips and ice-cream and drink Pinot Grigio by the pint. Perhaps Joe and I can take the kids somewhere by the coast one weekend before the summer is over. It would be nice to get away for a few days together if we can. Finances are tight for both of us, but a couple of nights in a basic B&B shouldn’t break the bank. It’s a long time since I’ve felt sand in my toes and I can just visualise long romantic walks on the shore, hand-in-hand with Joe.
I’ve made an effort with my appearance today. A flippy, floaty summer dress in pastel shades, dainty sandals, a straw sunhat. I’m doing Earth Mother plus Felicity Kendal meets Festival Grunge and I feel fabulous, light of heart, mood sunny and bright. I’ll seriously frighten my colleagues if I turn up to work still feeling like this. Charlie won’t recognise me.
There’s no gardening going on today when I arrive, instead the residents are relaxing in the garden, chatting and reading. There are a few blankets spread out on the grass and it’s the perfect spot for a picnic lunch. It all looks so pretty here with an array of colourful flowers out in full force – I’ve no idea what as, by now, you know I’m totally not green-fingered, but they look great. If I had a garden this is the vibe I’d want.
Then I spot Joe over in a corner under the shade of a tree that’s out in white blossom. He’s lying stretched out on his side on the grass, sunglasses on his head, and looks hotter than hell. When I get closer, I can see that he’s showing two of the young women who live here how to make daisy chains and I get a rush of affection for him. I stand to one side where he can’t see me and watch for a moment as with his big, strong fingers he makes little holes in the stem of one daisy before threading through another. His pupils watch with rapt attention, tongues out in concentration as they follow his moves. He smiles paternally at them both, guiding their efforts and high-fiving them when they get it right. The women are happy, giggly and are clearly quite smitten with him. I know how they feel.
I step into the shade of the tree with them. ‘Hi, there. Can I join you?’
‘Take a seat,’ Joe says and I sit on the grass cross-legged with them. ‘This is Stella and Kate. Ladies, this is my friend Ruby.’
‘I like your dress,’ Kate says.
‘Thank you.’
‘We’ve made three chains,’ Stella says. ‘It’s not easy.’
‘Looks like you’ve made a great job, though.’
She beams with pride.
‘I haven’t done this for years.’ I pick some daisies and start to thread them myself.
‘Gently,’ Joe instructs. ‘You don’t want to crush the stems.’
I grin at him. ‘I have to say that I’m very impressed by your talent.’
‘You can’t have a daughter called Daisy and not be an expert in the art of making daisy chains. I am practically Jedi,’ he boasts.
The more I see of this man, the more I like him. I can just imagine him sitting patiently with Daisy as a toddler showing her how to do this. Sweet.
We make a few more chains and I fix circles of the flowers on Stella and Kate’s hair. I drape them round their necks and fasten them to their wrists. Now I’m getting into the swing of this, it’s all coming back to me.
‘We need to make more,’ Kate says. ‘For everyone.’
‘I’m not sure we have that many daisies,’ Joe says. ‘But you keep going. I need to leave you lovely ladies. Ruby and I want to have a chat.’
‘Aww.’ Stella and Kate pull faces.
‘I’ll be back later,’ he says. ‘You could show some of the others what to do now that you’re so good at it. I’m sure Maggie and Lou would like to learn.’
‘Yeah,’ Stella shouts enthusiastically. ‘Let’s show them, Kate.’
‘Ask them nicely,’ Joe says.
‘OK.’ And they bound off in search of willing pupils to show off their new skill.
‘You have some nice people here,’ I say when we’ve watched them go.
‘Stella and Kate came in about five years ago at more or less the same time. They’re inseparable. They do really well.’ Then he looks at me wryly. ‘With only the occasional meltdown.’ He takes my arm and even the touch of his hand on my skin thrills me. ‘Let’s get a drink.’
We go over to the terrace of the café where we went last time and, as it’s so hot, we eschew coffee and both have fruit smoothies. The hit of fresh berries is sharp on my tongue and, languidly, I wipe away the condensation that runs down the glass.
Away from the ladies and our daisy chains, there’s a change in Joe’s demeanour. He puts his sunglasses on and stares out into the garden, not looking at me. The sun goes behind a cloud for moment and it makes me shiver.
Then Joe turns towards me and I can tell by the expression on his face that something is terribly wrong.
Chapter Eighty
‘There’s no easy way to say this, Ruby.’ His hands grip the edge of the table and I feel my heartbeat thud in my chest. He blows out an unhappy breath. ‘After all that happened with Tom we’ve been in turmoil as a family.’
‘I can understand that,’ I say. ‘It’s perfectly normal. He must have been traumatised.’
Joe nods. ‘Thank you again for helping out. It was fantastic of you and I’m grateful that you had my back. I should have sent you flowers or something afterwards, but … well …’
‘That doesn’t matter. I did it for you, for Tom. I’m just glad that I could be there. In a weird way, I felt that it helped the children to see that I am actually a nice person. Hopefully, they’ll be happier that I’m in their lives now.’
‘That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.’ Suddenly, he looks as if he has the weight of the world on his shoulders and my stomach flips over. ‘Seeing Tom like that has made Gina re-think her priorities. She’s been round every day since.’ He’s uncomfortable when he continues. ‘Not just to see Tom, but to see me too.’ Joe is wrestling every word out. ‘She realises that she’s been missing the children.’
I’m too stunned to point out that she’s had a very funny way of showing it.
‘We’ve been talking a lot,’ he adds, flatly. ‘Some of it round in circles.’
My head is spinning too. I’m not liking the way this conversation is going and I don’t know why. But my anxiety is growing and I’m apprehensive about what Joe will say next. I wait for what feels like an aeon.
‘The upshot of it all is that she’d like to give it another go.’ He runs a hand over the shadow of stubble on his chin. ‘Give us another go.’
I feel as if I’ve been punched in the stomach. Out of all of the scenarios, this is the one that I could have least imagined. It’s only natural that Gina would be wanting to cling to her son after what had happened, but I thought she was too happy, too loved-up with her new man to return home. It seemed as if she’d flown the family nest for good. Try as I might, I can’t get my head round it. Does she think she can walk back in, just like that?
When I fail to speak, Joe pleads, ‘Say something.’
But I’m not sure that I have the power of speech. I open and close my mouth a few times but nothing comes out.