There were many rules to surviving in a prison. The first, and the most important was keep all your holes shut. You didn’t see anything, you didn’t hear anything, and you sure as hell didn’t smell anything either. That was the easy part… What you had to do in order to keep the holes below the waist shut, now that was hard…often times dangerous. But I saw what happened to the girls who didn’t take that risk and I was not interested in being broken like them.
“Aww, aren’t you pretty? Wanna be friends?” Dallas, one of the bigger, newer female inmates, laughed like a wild hyena, grabbing another new girl’s chin. They had been processed together so I’m guessing that’s why she locked onto her so quickly. “Come on…it’ll be fun. Give me a little kiss.”
The girl tried to move from the cafeteria table, but Dallas grabbed her arm. I glanced over to the guards who, like always, pretended not to see anything.
It’s been thirty-seven days, they’re due for a reminder...but it’s mac and cheese day. I frowned back over at the golden dish that I could be happily eating, when Dallas’ voice reached me again.
“Believe you want to be my friend.” Dallas wasn’t looking at anyone else, which meant I’d catch her off guard. Thirty-seven days without an incident was pushing it, Ivy.
“Damn it!” I muttered then sighed stepping out of the lunch line bitterly. Walking over to their table and before Dallas could land her hot lips on the girl, I put my tray in between their faces.
“HEY!” Dallas smacked the tray.
“Leave her alone, Dallas. She’s just a kid.”
Dallas jumped onto the table, mostly because she needed to. Being four foot eight wasn’t going to even scare the cat in the yard, let alone me.
“What did you say to me?” she yelled at me.
“I said leave her alone—”
“Or you’ll do what, chica? Huh? You know who I am?”
I looked at the two other women…and I used that word sparingly…as they stepped up behind her. Rumor had it Dallas’ boyfriend was some real badass gangbanger on the streets. Good time to remember that one, Ivy.
“Yea, now you got nothing to say, do you, princess? You’re kinda cute. How’d you like to be my friend?”
The moment her short, stubby fingers pushed my head to the side, I grabbed her legs before she could blink and pulled her off the table, the back of her head hitting both the table and the seat. On the ground, I took my tray and shoved it into her mouth.
“Bitch!” One of the masculine two came at me, landing a kick right to my ribs, as I pulled the tray out of Dallas’ mouth and hit the chick’s eye, punching right into her throat and again into her nose.
“You…” A second one came at me, but I was so lucky she was as dumb as she looked because she tripped over one of Dallas’ shoes. When they came off I had no idea, but damn…old girl went down harder than a ton, her chin hitting the edge of the table…damn.
“You crazy ass—” Dallas jumped onto my back like a damn monkey, pulling my hair, so I did the only thing I could. I jumped and allowed myself to fall back right on top of her.
“Ahh…” she cried out, letting me go. Rolling off her for only a second before turning around, I punched my hands into her face, over and over and over again, until my knuckles hurt so badly I grabbed the tray on the floor beside me and shoved it right back between her lips.
“Dallas, you’re new here,” I said, blowing my blond hair out of my face before continuing on, “but people don’t call me princess. They call me Psycho Ivy. It’s not very creative, I’ll give you that, but it gets to the point. You touch me, you end up in Medway. You come at me the wrong way, you end up in Medway. You disturb my peace, you end up in Medway! We clear?”
She tried speaking against the tray, but I held it hard.
“I’m going to need a yes or no from you, Dallas, before the riot squad enters!”
“Uhghghs!” She struggled, but I pinned her down.
“What was that?”
“EVERYONE DOWN!” The cavalry came in with their damn black suits and everything. Letting go of her, I laid down on the ground with my hands over my head.
“You’re so fucking dead,” Dallas muttered to me. “You. Your whole family. Everybody gonna die.”
Turning my head to her, I smiled.
“I got no family, Dallas. I’m in here for a long time. So unless your boyfriend cuts off his dick, he ain’t touching me. And we both know he don’t have the balls for that.” When I leaned in she tried to lean in. “Should I write out instructions for him?”
“You’re sick in the head.”
“Yea, I told you that…a few times in solitary will do that to you.” I winked just as they zip tied my hands and feet like always.
“O’Davoren! I should have known!” Jimmy yelled as he lifted me up with some other guy.
“I want it noted I didn’t get to eat lunch, boys!” I yelled, relaxing. “And seriously, it doesn’t take two of you to pick me up.”
“SHUT UP, O’DAVOREN!”
“Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell the blood of a Dallas lass. Be alive, or be she dead, I’ll grind her bones to make my bread…hahaha! Dallas! Dallas!”
“That’s it! Shoot her up!” he yelled.
“No!” I screamed, struggling in their arms. “You can’t do that! No! No! Let go!”
They pinned me to something, rolling up my sleeves, and I tried to fight. Even knowing that it would do nothing, I tried to fight until I felt the heat of it as it entered my skin. It took a second until everything just became loose and I couldn’t even hold my body up anymore.
Before I knew it, I was back in the dark cell. They just dropped me…like I was trash. And because of that damn shot I couldn’t really move. It was the scariest thing in the world. To be in a dark room…and be completely paralyzed.
What little strength I did have I used it to watch the door.
Nothing had ever happened to me. But I heard the other girls.
And I knew it was only a matter of time…especially with that new one. But if he came I had something for him.
What good does it do if I can’t move?
Concentrate.
Breathe.
Calm yourself.
Concentrate.
Breathe.
Calm yourself.
“That’s…it.” I smiled when I felt my finger twitch.
I smiled. Though it was the most pathetic in smile the world. This is how I survived here. I wasn’t insane…well apparently that was debatable because not many of the other girls acted like me. But this was the only thing I knew how to do.
This wasn’t supposed to be my life.
Shaking my head clear, I did my best not to think like that. If I did, I’d get upset. If I got upset, I couldn’t think, and if I couldn’t think, I was as good as dead.
Act crazy. Act as if you aren’t capable of thinking logically. Insanity is your friend. Fight. That is how you survived. That’s how all the holes stayed closed. How you don’t break…
ETHAN