“Please, everyone, take a seat.” Roland speaks up while we all stand around awkwardly.
The following game of musical chairs is even more uncomfortable. Kennedy moves to her mom and they hug for a long time. The knot in the center of my chest pulls my eyes away and I focus on the task of finding a seat. Eden and Jonah sit next to each other on a couch, and Silas sits next to them. Bridgette places herself in the chair across from them and they engage in what I’m sure they mean to seem as casual conversation, but their eyes flickering toward me every few seconds gives me a hint of the subject of their conversation. Taking a deep breath, I run my hand over my head and move toward the food table. I’ll stand.
“Matt.” A soft hand on my shoulder fills me with warmth.
“K. Sawyer,” I turn around and offer her a playful smile.
She bites her lip, which looks bare without its ring -- even though I’ve only seen her wearing it once—and gives a tiny shrug. “So?” Her eyes lift and meet mine with a shocking amount of nerves.
I touch her upper arm for a second, before realizing all the eyes on me, and then shove that hand in my pocket. “You did good.” I smile and bite my lip, too.
She scrunches her nose like she smells something rotten and rises to her tiptoes, whispering in my ear. “Why are you being weird?”
I tilt my lips toward her ear. “This is all kind of weird, don’t you think? What are we doing here?”
“Oh!” She giggles nervously. “Right.”
With a deep pink overtaking her cheeks, Kennedy turns to the rest of the room, addressing them with a bold confidence returning to her voice
“Thank you guys for coming back here with us. Roland and I just wanted to have a chance to touch base with everyone once the service ended, and we knew the crowd might be a bit much today. So, we’re going to hang back here and have some lunch. If you need or want to leave at any point, feel free.”
A quick movement catches my attention out of the corner of my eye. Whipping my head toward a far exit of the room, I can’t believe what I see. Who I see.
My father, former pastor Joseph Wells. Buck Wells if you knew him before his ministering days. I still don’t know how Kennedy’s mom knew that was his nickname, but we’ve all been kind of busy since that revelation, so I’ve let it go for the time being.
He leans against the doorframe and crosses his arms in front of his chest. I don’t know what possessed him to show up. He didn’t bother to grace me with his presence when my mom came up for Parent’s Weekend. The back of my neck breaks into a sweat.
“Excuse me,” I mumble to Kennedy and whoever might be in earshot, and I walk toward his towering shadow. I’d say his presence, rather than shadow, but he hasn’t been present for quite some time. My breath quickens the closer I get to him, and my hands ball into fists inside my pockets.
“Matthew,” he clears his throat but speaks while barely moving his lips, his jaw set tight.
I draw a deep breath through my nose, exhaling my response. Careful that no one else hears me. “What the hell are you doing here?”
CHAPTER THREE
Cough Syrup
Matt.
The back of my throat burns as the curse flies out of my mouth toward my father. His eyes close in one long blink, as he seems to let the words wash over him while he takes a deep breath. His rigid jaw flexes before he speaks.
Under normal circumstances, words like this would have granted me an open-palmed slap across the face. I’m sure of it, though I’ve never had the gall until this very moment. A moment when I know there’s nothing he can do or say.
“Matthew,” his voice is raspier than usual, even in his whisper, “ I know you’re hurt, but that’s no excuse to forget the kind of man you are. Or where you are. I suggest you start that over again.”
I swallow hard, my hands, now at my sides fighting to bunch into fists. “Yes, sir.” I clear my throat. “What are you doing here?”
He tilts his chin toward the room. “Seems you’ve gotten yourself into something here.”
I shrug. “Kennedy’s a friend, Dad.”
“Girlfriend by the sound of things.” His tongue moves slowly over his lips as his eyes roam the room. I can tell by how they widen that they’ve settled on Kennedy.
I swallow hard and roll my eyes. “You above most people in this room know that we shouldn’t take rumors at face value.”
Screw him, I’m an adult.
“There’s so much you don’t know, Matthew.” He lowers his head, and for a second I see my dad. The real him. The one I know is buried deep in there somewhere.
“And just as much that you won’t tell me. Why didn’t you come to Parents’ Weekend?”
“Honestly, I wasn’t sure if I was ready to come … here.” He gestures behind him to where the sanctuary is located. “I’ve got a lot I’m working through, Son. You know that.”
“Yeah,” I snap. “We all know that.”